Hi everyone,
Subject title says it all really - we have an almost 11 month old (few days off of), and he has never slept through. I don’t even really know where to begin to explain his patterns but lack of sleep is affecting us badly. He had a good run of 4-6 hours straight each night from around the 5 month mark and then teething and his first cold hit and since then all has went downhill. We’ve stayed consistent with bedtime routines and times etc and read all the advice from the books. For example, trying to put him down awake but drowsy…impossible for us as he flips over onto his tummy, then stands up at the bars of his cot and cries to be picked up again. He has a bedtime bottle but sometimes he doesn’t even touch this as he’s lost almost all interest in formula (fully weaned and great eater) so I can’t say that the nighttime bottle is a crutch as it’s not consistent. Some nights he will want a feed, well, some nights it’s all that will settle him - varies between 11pm-4:30am. He sleeps better if he’s brought into our bed, and I feel stupid for giving in but in the wee hours when we’re shattered, it’s a move of desperation! If he wakes up we have to jump up and pick him up as even giving him back his dummy rarely settles him and he needs loud shooshing , back patting, rocking and cuddles etc to fall back asleep. Sometimes he doesn’t and can be awake for a few hours. We’ve used all tog variations of sleep bags, nightlights, white noise, cot mobiles etc and nothing works. Our situation is a bit strange at the moment, we’re roomsharing with him as due to repair issues with our private let property, we had to move back into my parents house. This was way back in July though and he’s perfectly content in his grandparent’s house so it’s not the change of location. We’re at our wits end and would appreciate any advice. He’s a loving, lively and comical wee boy and naps average during the day I’d say. But I’m a first time mum and questioning absolutely everything, worrying what I’ve done or am doing wrong.
This is an example of what a typical 24hours may look like for us :-
Wake for the day - 6:30/6:45am
Breakfast (solids) - 7/7:30am
Teeth brushed and dressed
4oz bottle (picks at this unless offered before a sleep)
Nap - 9:30/10am for anywhere between 30-60mins
Lunch (solids) - 12-1pm
4oz bottle (same as before)
Nap - 2:30/3pm (roughly 60-90mins)
Dinner (solids) - 4:30-5:30pm
Bath (not every night and separated from bedtime routine)
Up to bed - 7pm, for nappy change, into pjs, bottle, songs and cuddles in the rocking chair.
7:30m put into cot.
Wakes anywhere between 8-10pm frequently. Needs picked up and resettled. One night he woke 4 times between 7:30 and 9:45pm.
If he sleeps from 7:30pm without waking in that first stretch he’ll normally wake around 12am, then 2/3am and stirs at 5am. The 5am stirring I can understand as my husbands alarm goes off at this time (although he’s normally up before it actually rings if you understand, but the movement as he leaves the bed/room might be disturbing our son, I figure?). If I get him resettled properly at 5am, then he normally carries on till his usual wake up time.
However, every night is VERY different to the last and in general he’s awake every 2-4hours, give or take. It’s around the 1/2am mark that I buckle under sleep deprivation and allow him into bed with us which can buy us a few extra hours.
I’m so sorry for rambling but felt I needed to give the bigger picture. Please can someone tell me what I’m doing wrong and how can I fix this?