Baby not sleeping unless latched

[ExcitingTimes2021]

Hi.

I was wondering if anyone is in the same boat, or has been in the same boat.

LO is 16 weeks. She has taken to only sleeping if she has my nipple in her mouth. If it falls out or if I try to roll away she seams to wake up minutes later. She will not accept a dummy. Tried multiple times, with multiple brands and shapes.
I’m getting so tired coz I’m dealing with very frequent wake ups (at least hourly) and back ache from the co sleeping position.
Even when she (rarely) unlatches herself she starts searching for the nipple a very short amount of time later. It’s like she never goes into that deep sleep and spends most of the night attached to me or thrashing around.

Any advise for a tired mum? X

Can’t offer any advice just sympathy as this was/is me :(

How often does she feed during the day?

It might be worth trying different dummies. The mam one is most like a nipple. You could try coating it in breast milk and putting something nearby that smells of you- I kept Muslins in my bra (don't forget to take them out before popping to the shops 😬) This worked eventually altho 10mo still feeds every 2h through the night. You could look into cosleeping and rolling away too but this isn't for me! I can't relax enough to sleep when she's in the bed.

No guaranteed any of that will help but fingers crossed. It's exhausting I know. I find following IBCLCs on Instagram who talk about how normal it is really helps me stay sane

Oh OP, I share your pain. I have definitely been there. My DD completely rejected any pacifier or bottles. For the initial 6 months I co-slept and firmly built an after-feed routine. Once the regular feeding suckle and swallow rhythm stops (usually by 20 to 30min) and becomes intermittent, I know she's had enough. I then position her to burp (lays upright 45 deg on her front on my chest) for 15min then I put her down. If she cries, burp position again, and put her down again when she settles. Can be tiring, but keep doing it, she will get it soon. Have your partner help too otherwise she won't sleep without you!

Your baby waking hourly sounds too frequent for a 16 week old. Even day time?Do you feed her hourly then? Maybe she has gotten used to hourly feeds hence the regular awakenings?

Another thing that hugely helped for me was when she went into her own crib. I did that when she turned 6 months and I wished I had done it sooner. Still only wants the breast for milk and bedtime, but goes down no bother. I then wondered if I was the one waking her up with my snoring and rustling in bed! She's now 14mo and still a light sleeper but no bother as long as all quiet and peaceful in her room.

Hope things improve for you and baby soon! xx

@seaborgium I would say probably every 2-3 hours during the day. Sometimes a little more, sometimes a little less.

@kitkatsky we are currently co sleeping. I have even dragged her big cot through, taken the side off abs attached it to the bed and tried to nurse her on there then roll away, but a few minutes after unlatching her she becomes insettled and wakes up!

@Doggywoof no during the day it’s 2/3 hourly I would say. But the same happens during the day. If I put her down I only get a 10 min nap if that where as if I hold her I get at least an hour. I’m thinking of getting a sleep consultant opinion when she is a few more weeks older. But they are so expensive and no guarantee it will work. I just don’t know what to do for the best really x

I can relate, OP. I remember when she used to nap it meant me sitting on the couch for an hour not daring to move. It does get better with time, tho. At some point I did just plonk her in the crib for daytime naps and let her cry it out. Eventually she got it. Hope you get your sleep soon!