How/who does the nights?

[ThePoliceOfficer]

Lying here awake on yet another night waiting for DD2 to go to sleep so that I can finally sleep too and it’s making me wonder, how do you split the ‘night shift’ in your household?.

DD2 is 4 months old now and I can’t take much more of this. She is a terrible sleeper at night, taking ages to settle, waking up multiple times or waking up the second she’s put in her crib. First time round I did it all but DD started sleeping through at 11 weeks. This time I am doing Mon-Thur & Sunday with DH doing Fri & Sat.

I go to bed at 9, baby given a bottle at 10/11, then I do the rest (breast). That way I usually get at least a 3/4 hour chunk at the start.

She with the boobs does all the night feeds. Thankfully both my babies slept through from fairly early on. Both are ill right now and I have a poor sad wee man asleep on my chest. DH has actually been helpful cleaning up projectile milk spew the last few nights but that is very much the exception. Other than that I think he's probably done one nighttime bum change in the last 6 months.

I do the baby, DH does the toddler. Before that I always did the toddler. We’ve split nights before (him doing until midnight and mr doing after) but I always wake up anyway unless I put headphones on. Baby currently wakes a billion times to be breastfed so we’re co-sleeping. Also 4months. Worst time for sleep I think!

We just play it night by night really, I do the majority of the re settling through the night and then he gets up with him in the morning and I sleep for an extra hour or two. We used to split it same as you but now my partner does some in the week too as my baby is still up some times a couple of times a night (8 months ) .

I'm breastfeeding and we do shifts still here and baby is same age as yours. So I express some milk during the day for my partner to cup feed at some point in the night.

We don't have a set routine. Some nights he does the first shift (ie that could be 10-2am or 11-3 depending on when baby goes to sleep, does one feed then stays with baby, waking me up for the next feed).

Other nights like tonight, we all went to bed together, I'm awake doing the second feed of the night and settling baby but once baby has had next feed I'll ask to swap. So I'll probably have been on shift 11-4ish tonight.

There's no way I could do all nights every night but that's mainly because baby has to be kept upright for at least 30 mins still due to reflux and can need quote a bit of settling and wakes up about 3-4 times a night. I need to have at least one 4 hour stretch a night to function and shifts allow this. If baby was just up twice I would probably do more nights rather than our shift system.

I think I might have to start going to bed early then problem is if I hear here crying I won’t sleep, bloody mum brain. Tbh I think DDs sleep is getting worse, came up at 10.30 tonight and madam slept in her cot for all of 15 minutes. She wakes up a lot usually but this is a new one on me….school run will be fun tomorrow!

We split them. I'd go to bed early and husband did til 1, then I'd take over. First was a crap sleeper so we barely saw each other for 2 years!

Fortunately second usually slept through from 4 months.

I have a 4 month old and he is BF so I do all the feeds. He wakes up every 2-3 hours.

I bath him at around 7:30-8 then feed him in bed and he's currently going to sleep around 9. I go to bed as well when he does.

His sleep isn't great atm - four month sleep regression?

He was sleeping around 3-3.5 hours and I could put him in his cot and he would sleep. Now he's up every 2-2.5 hours and tonight isn't settling as well when I put him down.

We are on wake up 3 but there have also been times in between when I put him down and he wakes up again. Not usual for him...

I find that I usually feel ok in the daytime apart from the odd night of really little sleep.

I did them. My first slept pretty well. My second didn't until three months. I bf my first until five months and my second for a year. My husband worked long hours. But I don't recall it being that bad, just a period to get through. I found never having a lie in worse- my oldest was up at 5.30 and ready for action. He's 18 now and still an early riser.

She is a terrible sleeper at night, taking ages to settle, waking up multiple times or waking up the second she’s put in her crib

She will need to learn to go from fully awake to asleep in the crib/cot.

Have you considered a sidecar cot?

Oh does 7pm till 12/1. In early days I was sleep by 7/730pm. He still does till 12/1 and I do rest of night. I'm still asleep by 9 now 😂

I used to put ear phones in, still do occasionally (for my other half snoring) and I still hear her. But it's on a muted basis, my Oh would take them out when he went to bed as I was initially worried I wouldn't hear her, but always do even with ear phones. Helps you sleep through it when you know oh is with lo x

@FATEdestiny

She is a terrible sleeper at night, taking ages to settle, waking up multiple times or waking up the second she’s put in her crib

She will need to learn to go from fully awake to asleep in the crib/cot.

Have you considered a sidecar cot?

We have a next2me crib so life should be made but…I ended up with literally no sleep last night so running on empty right now. I didn’t think she could have a sleep regression when she hardly sleeps to begin with!

In the early days, I used to go to sleep after the 7pm / 8ish feed and sleep through until about 2 or 3 or whenever they woke, and dh looked after them after I'd gone to bed until 11pm / midnightish feed then he'd sleep through until morning.
As they got older, we'd take turns so each of us go one good night's sleep every other night.