6 week old barely sleeps

[Fourleafclover93]

My 6 week old baby barely sleeps. He sleeps for 2x 3 hour sleeps during the night then around 4x half hour naps during the day. So around 8 hours in 24 hours.

The rest of the day he is awake. Some of it he cries as he has colic but most of the time he just sits looking about. If I leave his sight he cries and I'm finding it impossible to get anything done.

I'd really like to get a nap during the day but with him only sleeping the odd half hour I can't do that.

I hear people saying babies sleep 16 hours a day and I think surely hes not sleeping enough. Is anyone else's baby like this? How do you get stuff done? Do you do things with your baby when hes awake? I feel hes still too young for classes etc.

DH does help when he can but he works 12 hour shifts 4 days a week.

Hes also stopped sleeping in his pram and in the car when we go out

That's a long way off the amount of sleep your newborn should be having. To the point where you could probably do with making a conscious and concerted effort to get baby sleeping more.

I wonder if you are under estimating the amount of help baby needs to go to sleep? Your baby is likely to need all of these to sleep (4S's)

● Sucking (dummy or feed to sleep)
● Swaddle (reduces stimulation)
● Swaying (bouncy chair, pram, rocking)
● Shushing (or white noise)

Also - limited awake time. Around 40-60 minutes is plenty awake at this age. After that, work on sleep.

Hate to say it but some babies just don't need sleep. I had a newborn like this who is now a 15 year old night owl and I have realised he just doesn't need much sleep.

Was great when he was a toddler because we could get late night / early morning cheap flights and he'd cope just fine and works for him now because he can do homework and still have plenty of time to relax too.

I think as long as your baby doesn't seem tired and cranky between naps then you might just have a non sleeper. Sorry!

Obviously if he is cranky then maybe try and find ways to get more sleep in even if that means sitting on the sofa watching box sets and cuddling him while he naps

And maybe get a sling?

The sling is entirely how I got everything done. Also white noise really helped. Good luck, it's miserable but it doesn't last forever.

Yep sling for sure! My baby does sleep a lot but only on me during the day. if I put him down while asleep, he'll wake after 45 mins. If he's in the sling, he'll sleep for hours and can get on with my day and not be stuck under a sleeping baby!! He's 9nweeks now and honestly it's my biggest mum hack!

Also you really have to help them sleep at this age. They don't know how to just go to sleep when they're tired and stay asleep until they're rested. 45-60 Mins awake then sleep. My baby at 9 weeks will be awake for an hour to 1.5 hours, sleep for 45 mins-2.5 hours all day from 8am - 8pm then wake 3-4 hourly for breastfeed overnight.

When you say get anything done, are you able to adjust your expectations for the fourth trimester and see keeping you and this baby alive as your full time (plus!) job?

In terms of sleep my baby would be suckling but also sleeping and that counts towards hours of sleep. In the first few weeks I had to learn how to help my baby stay asleep after the first sleep cycle. I am breastfeeding now and certainly don't feed on any schedule. I feed on demand which means baby can go several hours in between some feeds and only 15 mins at other times, with varying length of naps in between. I found that walking baby in the sling helped ensure she got enough sleep. I also still do shifts with her dad to make sure I get some sleep as she contact naps (on me or in the sling) so I can't sleep when she does in the day.

You could literally have been discribing my baby 12 years ago except mine slept even less - only around 6 hours in every 24. A couple at night in 1 hour bursts and then a few 40 min naps in the day.
Even someone pushing for an hour in a pram did no good.
It took an hour of rocking to even get that couple of hours in the night and then an hour of sucking on the boob to get the second hour.
We tried everything. Went to the gp who just laughed us out of the room.
By 8 weeks my husband and I were shells. I was hallucinating with lack of sleep and had lost so much weight as I couldn’t even eat due to the stress. Was in a very bad way.
I decided to do controlled crying in the end as a last resort which isn’t for everyone but I was absolutely desperate.
Well fed baby. Burped and clean. Put down when sleepy with white noise. Cries as soon as put down in crib. Leave 5 mins. Go and comfort, rock, offer more milk. Put down and leave 10 mins. Comfort rock offer more milk. Put down and leave for 15 mins. Then repeat every 15 mins.
Took 3 very hard nights and then boom. Slept for 4 hours.
A few nights later slept for 4 hours, wake for food and then 2 hours
Felt like a miracle at the time.
Still only napped for 30-40 mins until 6 months but I could take that if it meant 4 hours at least at night

Leave 5 mins. Go and comfort, rock, offer more milk. Put down and leave 10 mins. Comfort rock offer more milk. Put down and leave for 15 mins. Then repeat every 15 mins.

I completely understand how this was your last resort PP, but this is absolutely terrible advice for a fourth trimester baby.

Have you read up on where he's at developmentally and what he needs from you?
If you can take it in turns to sit up with baby so one of you gets some sleep. I didn't get anything done except feed my baby, change my baby, interact with baby etc. My husband did all the food shopping and cooking and family helped with cleaning and taking the baby for pram or carrier walks so I could rest. It will get better but baby is still tiny and it's totally normal to want to be on you all day and night. A sling will absolutely help!

Thanks for the replies. Im not replying individually but I'll cover some things that have came up a few times.

At midnight and 3am he will feed to sleep (I'm bottle feeding) or the feed will make him drowsy that I can cuddle/rock him to sleep. And I use white noise and keep it on once I put him down for a bit.

During the day no amount of feeding, dummy, cuddling, rocking, shushing, white noise works. He hates being swaddled and cries, screams and wriggles till he manages to get his arms free. I swaddle him with arms free or use a sleeping bag.

Doesn't sleep in the pram anymore or if he does it's just dozing on and off and he wakes as soon as it stops moving. Walk for around an hour with the dog so it's not like it's just a quick walk and he isn't getting a chance to fall asleep properly. Doesn't sleep in the car either, just seems to look about. The very occasional time he falls asleep he wakes when it stops where as when he was only a few weeks I could transfer him into moses basket.

I've gave up on the idea I'd manage any housework unless DH is off and we share it. Even just getting food, a bath, ready to go out is hard work on my own. Need to put him in a vibrating bouncy chair and move him round my house with me so he can watch.

I'm not prepared to do controlled crying.

I have a sling/carrier which I use to go out walking when the weather is okay (in Scotland so rarely 😂) so think I'll need to use that in the house. I was reluctant to do it because I thought I might be making a rod for my own back and he would expect to be attached to me for alot of the day. Seems like the done thing tho from reading the replies.

To the people who said their baby didn't need much sleep my parents said it's karma because I only slept 5 hours out of 24. So maybe he gets it from me. Thankfully parents are sympathetic having gone through it and help out when they can.

Annoyingly the one time he sleeps a week is when the health visitor comes to weigh him. Im sure she thinks im making it up lol

I have a sling/carrier which I use to go out walking when the weather is okay (in Scotland so rarely 😂) so think I'll need to use that in the house. I was reluctant to do it because I thought I might be making a rod for my own back and he would expect to be attached to me for alot of the day. Seems like the done thing tho from reading the replies

Yes use it in the house!! You are NOT making a rod for your own back, you're doing what's necessary to get you both more sleep now. Sleep begets sleep, as well; it's mad but babies sometimes get too tired to sleep. The more your baby sleeps, the easier he'll find it to fall asleep, if that makes sense, as he'll get used to how it feels. Right now you both need rest. Use the sling as much as you need, if he sleeps in it!

If you have a buckled carrier, you might find a stretchy cotton sling comfier for you both at home. I was able to get mine to sleep in that and then carefully sit down and get comfy on the sofa for some solid hours of Netflix eventually. Kept me sane.

Read up on sleep regressions. Six weeks is the first one.

@apricotshandy thanks, definitely going to try using it in the house

Honestly I can't tell you how much the sling has changed my life. This stage of newborn doesn't last that long and they won't always need carried in the sling, they will change and grow and develop but you do what makes everything easier at each stage. I am still dragging my bouncer from kitchen, to bathroom to bedroom and back so I can have breakfast, shower and get ready before putting him in the sling for nao times and he's 9 weeks. Do what you need to do! Babies need sleep.

Hi @Fourleafclover93 this sounds a lot like my baby: at around this age (more like 8 weeks with mine to be fair) I had to make a conscious effort to put him to sleep. You might be making the same "mistake" as me. When they're first born they sleep all the time as you know, but gradually they will be awake for longer periods of time and they will need a bit of help getting back to sleep - took me a while to realise that.

As someone else mentioned on here, think of the four Ss.

at first, be very conscious of when they should be sleeping, so after 60 mins of awake time, consciously try and get them to sleep, eg rocking them.

I remember going mad wondering why my baby didn't sleep, then realised they needed help.

Remember the older they get though they need less awake time, so don't do the 60 min sleep thing for Long as it will stop working after a week or so! Google awake periods and take it from there. Good luck and you're doing really well x