13m old sleep is worse than ever - please come in and tell my your stories

[Marghe87]

I posted a similar thread a few weeks ago but as things are not getting much better am keen to hear more stories and tips from other mnetters.

DD has never been a good sleeper, went through different sleep regressions and often wakes up shortly after being out down. There have periods where she has slept longer stretches, leading us to believe we were reaching the light at the end of the tunnel but then it always went back to hell. She had improved a lot at around 10 months but then started nursery before turning 1 and it has been a nightmare ever since. She has also been ill quite frequently plus has been teething too, which doesn't help, but she seems to be breastfeeding ALL NIGHT LONG most nights and wakes up continously. Is this mostly separation anxiety due to me returning to work?

We always cosleep but she starts the night in her own cot. I move her in our bed when she wakes up after we are also in the room and she has always been breastfed to sleep. I am against sleep trainings and letting them cry methods but am open to ideas on how I can improve this as it's becoming really tiring and none of us are getting any sleep.
Is it just a phase and a matter of powering through it? If you have been through something similar, do you remember when things improved for good?
Should I night wean her? She is so reliant on the breast and I fear with the current separation anxiety it would be too much on her so I am keen to wait a few more months to do that. Any tips?

White noise saved my life at 14 months.
Worth a try.
Still use it now at 3.

@RainyDayzs we have been using it ever since she was born, doesn't make much of a difference to her unfortunately.

Have you tried changing the noise?
I have to go between a Hoover, fan and rain 😂

I hate to say it but cry it out was the only thing that worked for my two...a couple of nights of pain for a lot of gain. Both sleep 11/12 hour stretches now. My 12 month old is no longer breastfed though and just has one bottle of cows milk before bed now. It sounds as if yours is feeding for comfort as assuming they wouldn't need that amount at 13 months? So maybe night weaning might be the key now. Sending hugs it's so hard when sleep deprived especially now back at work.

My sympathies! Neither of mine have been good sleepers.

You say you co-sleep, are you doing that with DH/DP in the bed too? If so have you tried sleeping with her just the two of you?

I have a super king bed, bed guard on each side and end up with both DS in my bed, one on each side. It's not ideal but we all get some sleep, and I figure it won't last forever!

Hey OP. Goodness, we had an almost identical situation when DS (now 17 months) was the same age. Best sleep of his first year at roughly 10 months, before having a dreadful sleep regression at ~12 months that lasted for about 8 weeks (sorry). It came at the same time as starting nursery and teething but I think it was mostly developmental. He changed massively at about 14 months of age. Sleep also improved dramatically and, apart from when he is unwell, he sleeps through (although usually starts the day at 5:30 )

I wouldn’t night wean now if I was you. Night weaning in an acute phase of bad sleep usually doesn’t work. I’d let the teething settle and nursery bed in and wait until she’s better. Then do it. You will need to decide the level of crying you can tolerate though. Unless she’s ready to night wean herself, there likely will be tears. For us it wasn’t actually much. Husband did bedtime and all wakes (he was never left crying alone) and it was fine within a night or two. We loosely based it on the Jay Gordon night weaning method, which you can google.

I hope things get better for you.

Have you read any sleep training books? Maybe Elizabeth Pantley for you and your family.

The No Cry Sleep Solution might solve it for you.