No sleep after 1am

[Sophieandtiger]

Dd is 3 weeks old, we have had bad nights and better nights and just going with the flow.

Lately though we are getting into a pattern of no sleep from 1am to 6am so would love some thoughts on how I can try to improve the situation slightly. I have a toddler DD who wakes at 6am, so it's a bit of a nightmare!

The baby goes down at 9pm and sleeps peacefully in crib till 1am. Then I feed, change, burp and settle her back in crib where she will sleep exactly 20 minutes then wake up loudly grunting/squirming/groaning.

After that it's just hours of an unsettled grunting baby that won't sleep and managing 20 minutes here and there at best.

Thought the grunting that keeps her awake was wind but she is burping a lot better lately and farting/pooing without crying. Thought it could be reflux too but she doesn't do it at any other time in the day.

Thought it could be that she doesn't want to be put down in her crib and co sleeping helped with that before but even if I co sleep she starts grunting and getting upset. Won't even settle on us at that time, she can be cuddled to sleep easily at any other time.

She is also not hungry, she takes huge feeds and always goes a few hours in-between. I keep offering (BF) but she is not interested.

Not sure what to do :(. I guess part of the problem is that she sleeps all day long, so maybe that's just her awake window. I've tried extending her awake times in the day or waking her more often but she is actually unwakeable, I get nowhere.

Any ideas? Thank you!!

To be honest with you, she's still a newborn. Newborns tend to sleep the majority of the day and be awake at the night. This is because they don't know the difference between night and day as of yet. It's one of those things that you have to ride out as your baby will soon start sleeping longer throughout the night and less throughout the day. It's also difficult to try and extend their awake period as many newborns can only stay awake from around 45mins to maybe 1.5/2hrs.

My daughter started sleeping through the night at 8 weeks however a lot of babies start to sleep throughout the night around 4-6 months. Give your daughter a bit of time and you'll slowly see her sleep patterns adjusting but as for now there really isn't much you can do as they're far too young to try and sleep train or anything along those lines

Thanks! Definitely understand it's just what newborns do but was wondering if I was missing something and could help somehow, for example if it sounded like reflux. Am a bit clueless about what the grunting means!

My first slept through every night from 3 months and I never had an issue settling her at night but she was a screaming colicky baby all day, so feel quite luck to have a chilled baby by day this time!

Hopefully we'll start seeing a shift soon as I'm starting to feel a bit ill from the 2.5 hours sleep a night but will keep plodding on!

Ah it definitely is hard having barely any sleep then having to look after a newborn and a toddler! I don't miss those days at all!!

As for the reflux, has she been bringing up milk shortly after feeds or between feeds because that's normally what reflux is? I think you said you don't think she has wind as she brings up burps quite easily but it wouldn't hurt to try her on infacol/gripe water for a week or so to see if it makes a difference? I used gripe water with my daughter and worked a treat! However we stopped her sleeping on her back and turned her around to her front which somehow helped her wind massively!

I hope she settles down soon and you're able to get a bit of sleep

I tried infacol briefly but it seemed to make her poo loads which increased the night wakings so I dropped it. Could have just been a coincidence though so maybe I will persist and once she reaches one month old try gripe water too.

I don't think she has reflux as she never spits up milk but was wondering about silent reflux. She does hiccup a lot, pretty much after every feed and there have been times where she seems to be chewing and swallowing something back down. We have had a bit of gagging too. My first never had reflux so don't have much experience.

So interesting you say about sleeping on her front as that's what I ended up doing in the early hours and she calmed down and fell asleep instantly. But as it's against the guidelines now I had to stay awake and watch her sleep!

Ah it's not easy is it! Don't want to wish those squishy cuddly days away though!

Ah no that doesn't sound great. Yeah definitely try gripe water if you feel she needs it as it's really good but of course all babies are different.

My daughter is 5 months now but what you're saying sounds so similar to what my little one had. Mine was formula fed so we'd constantly take the bottle out after she'd drank a little to burp her and keep her sitting up for a little while once she'd finished. However I'm sure you're probably doing the same with burping often but in case you're not, you can try doing that and see if it makes a difference.

It's hard and I definitely won't tell you what to do with your child or go against the guidelines but I would advise you do what's best for you and your baby. Mine had such bad wind we could see she was in physical pain having to lie on her back, she was always tossing, turning and doing little grunts throughout the night. As soon as we put her on her back she calmed down and her wind improved so much more too!
When I did start putting her on her front I was the same, I didn't sleep for two nights because I'd watch her to see how strong her neck was and if she was able to lift it and turn her head over if she wanted too. Luckily she had a strong neck so was fine but it's definitely scary to start off with!

I know the recommendation is to not have babies on their side or front until they're able to roll over by themselves but again, do what's best for you and baby!
Wishing you guys all the best

Thank you so much @hereforfun it helps so much to talk it through.

I'm a bit rubbish at burping so been watching videos and trying new techniques! Will definitely consider the front sleeping too if it comes to it, she has a strong neck too from breastfeeding in various positions.

But yesterday I tried being consistent with Infacol and also tilted her crib more and we actually had an amazing night! She settled back in her crib after every feed, just fed at 11pm and 3am and was still in her crib at 6.30! After several days of no sleep after 1am I felt like a new woman this morning!

I know newborns like to change it up every few days so I'm sure this bliss won't last but I really enjoyed it!

No worries! Nighttime was such a difficult time for me in the first couple of months so I definitely sympathise. It's hard as hell.
Feel free to pm at anytime if you just need someone to rant too

Yeah burping frequently helps so so much! Makes a massive difference so that's good you're watching videos to find out different techniques to try.

Aw yay that's so good to hear🥳 amazing how much difference Infacol made for the day. And a new position for her bed haha.
Please enjoy these hours of sleep and I hope it lasts for the rest of the week at least:)