Dealing with split nights

[IcedCoffeeAlways]

DS is 11months. Usually sleeps 7.30pm-6/6.30am with a few wake ups (about 3 per night on average). Wakes are usually either self settle or a quick cuddle and he’s back asleep - maximum of about 10 mins each time.

The last 5 nights he’s been wide awake from 2am-5am on top of his normal wakes and I am completely exhausted. During this awake time he’s not fussy at all, he literally just wants to cuddle - he just lays there wide awake. He occasionally chatters away. He’s not hungry - I’ve tried offering a bottle and he takes about 1oz then just pushes it away. He’s perfectly content - unless I lay him down, then he gets really upset.
He eventually drifts off back to sleep about 5am and then wakes as usual at about 6.30am.

Daytime sleep is normally 2 naps totalling about 2-2.5hours and he’s awake by 3pm at the latest from his second nap so that he’s ready for bed at 7.30.

I’m sure it’s just another phase - but how on earth do people deal with the practicalities of so little sleep and function normally. Between his wakes and this big awake stretch I’m probably getting about 3hours of broken sleep per night this week. I start back at work tomorrow after Maternity Leave and I’m honestly like the walking dead at this point 😓

Any helpful advice? Or anyone else in the same boat?

Hi @IcedCoffeeAlways, Im in the same boat, so no helpful advice, just solidarity!

My little one has just turned one, but for the last month she has been having mainly spilt nights, and I'm also due back to work next week and wondering how I will cope with working 12 hour days along with this. I think her dad will have to share out the weekdays with me. She's the same in that she's not hungry/ thirsty and just wants to either cuddle or chatter.

Ive taken to giving her a comfort toy, which is great and she will lie quietly and fuss it, but sometimes it takes 2 hours+ for her to go back to sleep by which time I'm wide awake and can't get back off. I don't really know when its safe to leave her with it, I do worry that she will suffocate (its just a small square of material with an animal head on it) so I feel I have to sit awake until she drops off and then I can try and take it off her.

Im clinging to the hope that its just a long phase and maybe that its a growth stage as she seems to be doing new things all the time?

@NightlyBye

Hi *@IcedCoffeeAlways*, Im in the same boat, so no helpful advice, just solidarity!

My little one has just turned one, but for the last month she has been having mainly spilt nights, and I'm also due back to work next week and wondering how I will cope with working 12 hour days along with this. I think her dad will have to share out the weekdays with me. She's the same in that she's not hungry/ thirsty and just wants to either cuddle or chatter.

Ive taken to giving her a comfort toy, which is great and she will lie quietly and fuss it, but sometimes it takes 2 hours+ for her to go back to sleep by which time I'm wide awake and can't get back off. I don't really know when its safe to leave her with it, I do worry that she will suffocate (its just a small square of material with an animal head on it) so I feel I have to sit awake until she drops off and then I can try and take it off her.

Im clinging to the hope that its just a long phase and maybe that its a growth stage as she seems to be doing new things all the time?

@NightlyBye Sorry you’re going through the same 😓 it’s pretty rough isn’t it? I’m hoping it’s related to a growth phase too. My DS started walking at about 10.5m and the split nights started not long after. He’s also like a little sponge at the moment, learning new things all the time!

Mine isn’t interested in a comfort toy at all - he just stands up and throws them out the cot 😅 but I’d be worried to leave him with one like you.

My DH is great and does is fair share of nights, but he works offshore and is home for 4 weeks then away for 4 weeks so if these rough patches start when he’s away then I’m on my own to deal with the sleepless nights. He’s not due home for another 2 weeks so still a while to go 😴 we had hoped to have me starting back at work just as he got home to give us 4 weeks to settle in to me working again but my work wouldn’t accommodate it so I’m having to start back while he’s away.

Hopefully it passes quickly for us both 🤞🏼

I don't have an answer, though I do have an 18 month old sleep thief who is doing the same. All the chat, and high fives, and kisses, and cuteness from 4-6am 😵‍💫

I have older children who were all the same at some point. So I do know that the phase passes eventually. I am not sure you're ever the same again even when they start sleeping better though.

I'd try cutting back on naps and putting him to bed earlier.

I researched this quite a bit as it happened a lot with my LO.

I was told make sure enough calories in the day and the other one was simply developmental 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️ it's meant to be on the verge of developing a new skill from what I remember. Another one too much day sleep 🤷🏼‍♀️ x

Tbh I think for my LO it was developmental 🤷🏼‍♀️ she's grown out of it but I expect it to be back 😴

@HappyAsASandboy Yeah I’m sure it is just a phase 😅 hopefully it passes sooner rather than later.

@crazyguineapiglady I tried cutting back his naps at the start of the week and it was a disaster! He’s really not ready to lose any of his daytime sleep just yet. He’s always in bed by 7/7.30 at the latest. With being back at work I can’t get him to bed any earlier unfortunately!

@Fancyties

I researched this quite a bit as it happened a lot with my LO.

I was told make sure enough calories in the day and the other one was simply developmental 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️ it's meant to be on the verge of developing a new skill from what I remember. Another one too much day sleep 🤷🏼‍♀️ x

Tbh I think for my LO it was developmental 🤷🏼‍♀️ she's grown out of it but I expect it to be back 😴

@Fancyties Yeah that’s all the reasons that I’ve seen too when I researched! He did start walking a few weeks ago so he’s working really hard on that and working lots on his talking so could be that 🤞🏼 I really don’t think it’s calories for him - he eats 3 good meals a day and is still taking more formula than he’s “meant to” at this stage - although I don’t tend to go buy the guidelines - he just gets fed when he’s hungry and stops when he’s had enough.

Perhaps it's developmental then? Lo is working on it in their brain at night Started walking working on talking x

My little one did/sometimes does this. It started at about 9m. At times it was ever night, other times just a couple of nights a week. The worst of it was over by 18m. It's always a 3hr awake block. We now get a couple of them a month, at 2.5, so it's rare, but still definitely a thing. Its knackering, and i don't know the solution, but I hear you.

Sounds developmental. I used to put mine in the pram and rock until he fell back to asleep. Could take about an hour but better than 3 hours…

@Fancyties I’m thinking it probably is. They learn so much so quickly, it’s no wonder it causes a bit of sleep really!

@Babyboomtastic yeah he’s done it a few times before but only seems to have become a regular thing just now! It makes me feel a bit better knowing it’s a normal thing - and I’m glad to hear the worst of it passed by 18m. Fingers crossed the same happens here 😬 and I hope you don’t have too many more to deal with 🤞🏼

@Wnikat I haven’t tried the pram yet so I’ll keep that in mind! 1h is definitely better than 3 😅

No advice but solidarity - my 13 month old does exactly the same! Hoping we can all find an answer xxx it’s not easy! Keep going mama you’re doing amazing

It's so nice to hear that others have gone through/ are going through the same.. definitely makes you feel less alone. I might try feeding her a bit more and see if that helps @Fancyties, its worth a shot!

I forgot to mention it could also mean not enough daytime sleep 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️

Worth a shot with anything tbh 🤷🏼‍♀️🤷🏼‍♀️

@PocketRocket12 sorry you’re dealing with the same ❤️ We’ll get through it!

@Fancyties he slept through the night last night bar 2x 15minute wake ups 😭🙌🏻 I’m sitting here SHOWERED and dressed still waiting for him to wake 👏🏼 He napped 15 minutes longer in total yesterday and had his dinner about 30 minutes later so we’ll attempt the same again today and see if it was a fluke or not 🤣

😂 😂 Good luck. Knew I jinxed myself when I said my LO wasn't doing it anymore. Last night 3am got 1.5 hours awake. She wasn't crying etc, fed changed cuddle and left her too it 😂

@Fancyties we shouldn’t mention it when they do good sleep should we?! 🤣🤣 fingers crossed your LO is back to normal tonight 🤞🏼

Thanks. Hope your lo continues to do good 🥰

I don’t want to jinx it, but I’ve had 2 good nights now with no long waking! More food seems to have done the trick!

My lo is 15 months and does this every night, I’m so exhausted. My partner is also offshore so I’m on my own. Her older sister is an early riser so I can’t even sleep in a bit later. I look and feel like crap

@Littleelffriend

My lo is 15 months and does this every night, I’m so exhausted. My partner is also offshore so I’m on my own. Her older sister is an early riser so I can’t even sleep in a bit later. I look and feel like crap

@Littleelffriend Hats off to you for managing the offshore life with more than one DC!! I’m struggling with just the one! I’ve just gone back to work too (although only PT) and I can already tell that I’m going to struggle more than I thought! Does your partner do long trips?

@IcedCoffeeAlways it varies can be a week in the North Sea or 6 weeks abroad somewhere. I’m only part time as well, thank goodness. Hopefully someone will come on with a miracle cure

Another post of solidarity - we had this at 10-11 months and it was dire. I’d just got back into my stride returning to work and being up half the night set that back a lot!

It just resolved itself suddenly. I think we had a couple of snotty colds and teething incidents and the Calpol effect meant we got a few full nights.

[quote Littleelffriend]@IcedCoffeeAlways it varies can be a week in the North Sea or 6 weeks abroad somewhere. I’m only part time as well, thank goodness. Hopefully someone will come on with a miracle cure[/quote]
@Littleelffriend Yeah, my DH is all over the place too. Thankfully usually UK and Europe at the moment but Middle East isn’t unusual. Trying to keep trips shorter where possible now that we have DC. Nice when he’s home and has quality time with DC though rather than being home just in time for bed time and leaving early in the morning like a lot of parents have to!