Melatonin for sleep/MH issue?

[23Elfie]

Hi All x
I have a 7 Yr old DC who has never slept through the night. DC seems to have some kind of severe separation anxiety at night and cannot sleep without me being near. When they do finally fall asleep, which is usually around 2hrs after originally being put to bed, and me having to sit on the floor by the bed, the sleep only lasts about 2-3hrs then awake again. The only way to get them to sleep is to let them get in my bed so we can both sleep.

DC is fine during the day and will go to school happily, join in, makes friends easily but its like a switch is flipped at night. Panic attacks, screaming and crying for hours if I try to leave before asleep.

We've seen the family support worker, school nurse and CAHMS therapist for CBT. Nothing works. I've begged for a sleep clinic referral to see if we can try melatonin but told no every time as DC does not show any signs of ADHD or autism.

I've spoken to a private health care clinic and the secretary told me that the consultant has prescribed melatonin for children like mine before. However, it's £450 for the consultation plus £150 for an appointment with the psychotherapy doctor. This is way beyond my reach as a single parent working part time.

My question is (and thanks if you've made it this far) has anyone else had this sort of issue and it finally be sorted? What I think DC needs is a short term prescription of Melatonin to help them learn that they can sleep on their own and stay asleep. Has anyone successfully managed to get a paediatrian appointment and if so how?
My doctor is very dismissive and I had to beg her for the mental health referral to CAHMS.

We really need some help as it's now effecting my mental health too. I dread the evenings and want some kind of life back in the evenings to wind down and chill. I can't even think about a relationship as id never be able to have someone over in the evenings.
I thought this would happen by the time DC was about 2... Anyone got any advice?

Thank you x

You can buy it online biovea. Been a life changer for ds. He still can’t get
To sleep on his own, even after using it a while but he’s asleep within half an hour of lowest dose. Been amazing.

Oh wow! I've looked online but never came across this! Does it help him to stay asleep all night?

We got some from iherb, didn't work for my DS sadly but it does for DH, 1mg is all he needs.
Hope it works for your son.

*hope it works for your DC

I have no advice other than Melatonin won't necessarily guarantee a full night sleep (not trying to take away any hope of a full night sleep but just wanted you to know it isn't a magic bullet). My dd2 is on melatonin and has been for 6 months (prescribed by a paediatrician - she has autism) as like your child she was unable to fall asleep without distress - I was sat with her for 2+ hours until she slept but she was exhausted, was waking during the night 3+ times a night. She now falls asleep quickly (takes melatonin an hour before bedtime and then only takes 15/20 minutes to fall asleep) but she is still waking in the night- our days often start at 3.30/4.00.

Again, not saying don't try it - it may well work - but know it might not offer fully what you are looking for.

Thank you for all your replies 😊 for those of you using it may I ask how old your child is and what dosage they have? I'm thinking of giving the Biovea a go x

There is some research coming out about synthetic melatonin may interfere with puberty

example here

A good magnesium helps sleep a lot, and most people are deficient in magnesium as our soil is so poor these days.

Something like this Magnesium Supplement,... [[https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B073WZ9SM3?ref=ppx_pop_mob_ap_shar&tag=mumsnetforu03-21e]]

Info on magnesium and sleep www.chandramd.com/blog/magnesium-supplements-anxiety

@23Elfie

Thank you for all your replies 😊 for those of you using it may I ask how old your child is and what dosage they have? I'm thinking of giving the Biovea a go x

My dd is on 2mg of slow release circadian (melatonin) a night - she is 6 almost 7.

[quote hamstersarse]There is some research coming out about synthetic melatonin may interfere with puberty

example here

A good magnesium helps sleep a lot, and most people are deficient in magnesium as our soil is so poor these days.

Something like this Magnesium Supplement,... e]]

Info on magnesium and sleep www.chandramd.com/blog/magnesium-supplements-anxiety[/quote]
Thanks for that @hamstersarse. That is interesting, going to have a read through that research later. My dd2 has a very restricted diet so I may have a chat woth her dietitian at the next appointment and see if we need to add in extra supplements

My 14 year dd is on 2mg of slow release circadian (melatonin) a night
we got it through the GP who wrote for advice from psychiatry because referral takes for ever. She is not diagnosed with any conditions and the information passed over was only the symptoms -stress, anxiety and insomnia. They recommended 3mg but it comes packaged as 2mg and that was enough for her. It worked wonders for her and she is now getting to sleep easily and staying asleep. for her it works very quickly. If your GP is unhelpful ask for a different one next appt and keep changing until you find one that understands.

Thank you everyone for replying, it really is appreciated. I'm going to find some quiet time on my lunch break tomorrow to have a read of the links you've all sent x

Sillydoggy I've emailed the surgery today and asked how I go about changing doctor, I was so surprised reading your post how you managed to obtain the medication, my current doctor is so 'no' all the time I didn't even know writing to psychiatry was an option!
Thank you ❤️

I tried melatonin myself this summer, after a period of chronic insomnia — it did nothing at all for me. However, a friend’s ten year old has had wonderful results with it.

I'm reading this and considering melatonin for my own peri menopausal insomnia. I didn't realise you could buy it from herbalists.

If your child goes to sleep fine when in the bed with you then I don’t think melatonin is the answer. I used to be that child- I was petrified at night, I don’t know why and I don’t know what of but it was a truly horrific feeling- I needed my parents in the same room as me. If your child settles with you the please give them what they need instead of looking to medicine, they will grow out of it eventually- I started to settle at around 13 or 14 but wouldn’t stay away from home without a parent until around 16

Hi haventhadanegg, thanks for your reply. I feel with my DC it is partly what you described feeling as a child, scared and needing someone with you. The other part is the fact that if she does fall asleep she can't stay asleep. She's 7 and it's also affecting my mental health now. I'm also a single parent so either get 1 or 2 nights off a week depending which week it is. I've not had a relationship since I split with her dad when she was 5 months old. I don't think it would work as I never get a second to myself. I know that's all a bit boo hoo and she absolutely comes first but I need to look after myself too and I feel like I'm running on a low battery most of the time x

@23Elfie

Hi haventhadanegg, thanks for your reply. I feel with my DC it is partly what you described feeling as a child, scared and needing someone with you. The other part is the fact that if she does fall asleep she can't stay asleep. She's 7 and it's also affecting my mental health now. I'm also a single parent so either get 1 or 2 nights off a week depending which week it is. I've not had a relationship since I split with her dad when she was 5 months old. I don't think it would work as I never get a second to myself. I know that's all a bit boo hoo and she absolutely comes first but I need to look after myself too and I feel like I'm running on a low battery most of the time x

Hi Elfie how did you get on?? My Daughter is 7 and exactly the same as what you are describing, Iv never had a good night sleep, she won’t sleep without the comfort of me, but like you I can be lay with her for 3 hours before she even goes to sleep, im sick of people telling me I’m too soft when they haven’t a clue how hard bedtime is and if that was the case my son would be the same. I was nearly at the point of insanity. My daughter was ref to CAHMs in May through school. She has sensory issues, smells, noises and with only ear beige food. She can’t keep still and really can’t control her emotions. She is very bright and sociable and has lots of friends. I always had an idea something was going on but never done anything about it as I never wanted to put that label on, but when school asked for a meeting and I sat and said it all out loud I knew something had to be done to get the support she needs. School said she’s so clever they don’t want her falling behind because of her concentration. Anyway my point, she was seen by a paediatrician psychologist and had a QB test with measures the levels of concentration on her brain compared to other 7 yr old she was diagnosed with ADHD on Monday and has been referred for her sensory issues. The psychologist told me that ADHD shows up very different in girls and they usually mask it. It’s normally not picked up u til 9-11. Maybe your daughter could be masking it?? I decided against day time medication and we are having the Behavioral therapy but I took him up on the melatonin she doesn’t know she’s having it, and we started Monday night she has it at 7 and she has been asleep every night for 8.30. She has been waking up and the first time in yrs getting herself dressed! I know exactly how you are feeling as I am the same. Maybe you should speak to the gp again and possibly have a ref to CAHMS. X

Hi StaceyLouise thanks for your reply. Since my post my daughter has now had a screening test for ADHD. We are waiting on the result of that to see if she needs the full assessment.
Thank you so much for your reply, its made me feel like we're not the only ones, and you totally understand what it's like. I'm so pleased your daughter got the help she needed, I've got my fingers tightly crossed that we will get there soon enough one way or another xx

Just a little update on this (if anyone is interested 😆) we FINALLY got a paediatrian appointment and went on Wednesday. I wrote down every single appointment with healthcare professionals we've had, apps I've tried, books we've read etc etc.. Poor guy looked a bit shocked when I pulled out two sides of A4 with details on lol. Anyway we spoke through that DC will be 8 in a couple of weeks and needs to take ownership of this for themselves it is their problem not mine. After a good long chat about that DC has been prescribed 2mg Melatonin and she's been asleep within 20mins and slept 10.5 hours both nights!! Wahoo! We're both so much happier these last couple of days than we have been in a long long time! Hopefully this will help DC to settle into a routine and then we can lower the dose and eventually go to sleep with no help at all. 🤞🤞🤞