Breastfeeding to sleep

[M24L]

DD is 8 weeks old and has been fed to sleep since day one I'm a first time BF so I thought this was normal until a visit with the HV the other day. I was telling her how our BF journey is going as we had a very rocky start and one of her comments was "its OK to feed to sleep sometimes" it never really sunk in until she had left and it's played on my mind since.

So a few Google searches to find out if "it's OK to breastfeed your baby to sleep" the information is so mixed in opinions.

So I'm looking for some real life experiences, who's fed to sleep and has it been OK when did it stop, how did it stop etc?

As mentioned my DD is 8 weeks old she wakes for a feed between 5am and 6am and she will feed to sleep then throughout the day she cluster feeds she will be on the boob for about an hour then come off coo and smile away then back on feed and sleep her nap will last no more than 20 mins and then we sort of repeat the process of feed, play, feed and sleep. DH jokes and says she's never got the tit out her mouth. This carrys on until around 8.30pm when she's settling for the night, she will feed to sleep normally sleeps for 9-9.30pm and thats her right through the night.

I enjoy feeding her to sleep as I wasnt aware there was any "issue" with it and to me it gives her the security but with the HV mentioning it I would be grateful to hear other people's experiences.

@staffieslobber oh no that mustve been quite draining, how did the self settling get on? This was what made me want to find out a bit more about feeding to sleep as I didn't know it was even a thing I just assumed all babies who are BF fall asleep while feeding and that it was the "normal" I can't seem to think of any other way especially if your waiting for the baby to unlatch themselves.

BF both of mine to sleep (one to 14 months) and the other 8 months in. They are only tiny once and are seeking the comfort and closeness of mum at bedtime.

Eldest Dc transitioned to a bedtime bottle fine when the time came and is a great sleeper now. DC 2 still gets bf during any night wakes (just started some gentle sleep training). There is something so satisfying about seeing their eyes roll back, them snuggling in and instant calm at a bedtime feed.

Follow mum instinct.

@M24L we discovered that she can be patted to sleep (lie her in her front, pat bottom and sing silent night 😂). Still sleeps terribly over night though so we're working on a gradual retreat method to see if that helps. I think part of the problem with teaching a small baby to self settle is that you can't put them on their front to sleep - I'm my (very limited!) experience they fall asleep much more easily on their front but of course it's not safe.

Sorry, I'm waffling and I don't have any very useful advice!

My little girl slept through at 7 weeks and 8 weeks and then stopped doing it for 8 months, sorry.
I always fed to sleep but with the second tried to always unlatch as he fell asleep (with your little finger in the corner of the mouth).

@thesplashing it's an amazing feeling isn't it 😍

@staffieslobber no I completely get what you mean my LO automatically tries to roll on to her side if I bring her into bed for a cuddle and she crashes out so quickly if I move her onto her side for cuddles.

@DressedUpAtAnIvy this is why I won't get my hopes up I believe this is just another phase 🙃 did your little one go back to getting up a few times?

Unfortunately, yes, don’t remember how many times at 3–4 months but she was waking up 12 times a night at 7 months (so we did gentle no-cry sleep training and it worked straight away).

I fed to sleep until it stopped working at about 8 or 9 months. So that was quite a number of months of easy bedtimes!

She also slept pretty well, despite the argument that if you feed to sleep they can't self-settle so you'll have poor sleep. From about 3 months she was on 2-3 wakes a night, by 8 months it was normally one wake. She did start sleeping through when I stopped feeding to sleep, but that might have been co-incidence.

@DressedUpAtAnIvy oh no, 12 times a night you must have been exhausted.

@110APiccadilly I don't think the whole self settle situation even came into my mind I was just going to go with the flow and see what happens.

Hi, my son is now 13 months. I fed him to sleep for the first 5 months as I hadn't looked into sleep at all until the 4 month regression hit. He needed boob in his mouth to get back to sleep all through the night and would only nap 30mins if I wasn't holding him. I was so broken. He was addicted to boobs.
I used habit stacking to gradually shift to settling him with shushing and patting his bum. Then got him attached to a comforter then it was a fairly easy transition to self settling at 6 months.

Take a look at parent and baby coach, she has lots of podcasts and a newborn sleep course that I'll be purchasing if I have another baby! Millie poppins also has lots of info and an info pack on transitioning from breastfeeding to sleep which I used.

If its not an issue for you then go with it but perhaps try and introduce another way of settling now whilst baby is still really young. Could dad try walking her around or patting? Is good to have another option up your sleeve, especially if they become really reliant on boob. The older they are the harder it is to change. Xx

Sounds like you're doing great. The only worry I would have is if the 4 month sleep regression hits, like pp have said, and the baby won't be able to go back asleep when they wake after a sleep cycle without a feed if that's they're sleep association.

*their

@EL1984 thank you for all the information I'll be sure to keep it handy, at the moment I enjoy the feeding to sleep and see no issues with it as I'm feeding until DD unlatches and that seems to be when she's sleeping. I didn't know it could cause issues down the line but at least I'll be a bit more prepared and have a few things up my sleeve to try should any issues arise.

@whatwillbetheendofus thank you 😊 I've never heard of the 4 month sleep regression either, feel like a whole new mum lol I either haven't heard of this or I did and have forgotten since DD1 was born 8 years ago. I'll be having a look into that as well.

I haven't read the full thread but I BF to sleep 100% of the time until DS was 4mo (when he stopped falling asleep at the breast on his own), then started again when he was about 7mo but DH could also put him down with cuddles.

DS is 19mo now and is still breastfed at bedtime has just stopped being BF to sleep (as we will wean soon), but until recently he was BF to sleep at bedtime 2-3 nights a week then would sleep through.

It can become a sleep association, and if it becomes a problem for you there are lots of things you can do to gradually move away from it (google habit stacking), but for now keep on BF to sleep; it is by far the easiest thing to do if baby goes for it!

“DH jokes and says she's never got the tit out her mouth”. What a lovely gent. Seriously though, I have never met a mother yet who has been given more reassurance than new concerns from a HV. Don’t pay any attention.

@pregnantncnc it works great so we're going to keep at it until DD stops thanks for the info on habit stacking it's always good to feel ready should any problems arise.

@sweetbabycheeses99 yeah I suppose that's true, HVs just seem to appear with a list of don'ts and no other alternatives or anything

I'm currently struggling with trying to stop breastfeeding my 5 month old to sleep. Have been trying for about a week to stop feeding her to sleep but it is not getting any easier. While I love feeding her to sleep I am going back to work next month and worrying about how the childminder will get her over to sleep. Maybe she is still to young to learn this?

@cpmumof3 it's such an comfort isn't it. I'm not sure if this helps but I find with DD that if shes with me she will feed to sleep but with DH he will walk her about over his shoulder and she eventually falls over. Your LO might settle ok with the childminder if she only associates the feed to sleep with yourself.