As I lie here dreading the night ahead, does anyone have any advice? Should I handle it differently?

[HelloItsMel]

I went away for a week and DS (2 years old) was a bit thrown by it. DH went against the one rule we've always maintained that toddler does not come into our bed, I don't blame him it was the only way they got sleep, when I got back he woke up that night again crying to come into our bed, I'd missed him so thought screw it, one night of cuddles then back to routine.

The next night he slept until 5am, DH out of habit went and got him in our bed and he fell back asleep until 8am. We didn't mind that, we actually got a longer lie in than normal as he usually wants breakfast at 6.30. This carried on for a few days but it's gotten worse.

He's waking up at 12 now crying for our bed. We've been saying no the last few nights and resettling him in his room, it's taking an hour or so to get him back to sleep and we're finding within 10 minutes of us being back in our bed he's awake at his door crying again to come in with us. We kept it up until 4am then gave in and he came in with us and slept until 8.30. We're all shattered and I'm lying here full of dread about tonight.

What do I do? He's always slept so well, I've been spoiled but I just feel like I don't know how to fix this!

Does your DS have a big enough bed for you or your DP to sleep in beside him?

@DragonDoor

Does your DS have a big enough bed for you or your DP to sleep in beside him?

No, we have slept on the floor on a duvet beside him but again it's not something we want to keep up and we didn't sleep well. We just want to get back to him sleeping in his own bed overnight, or atleast til 5/6am I don't mind a morning cuddle!

I will note, he always fell asleep on his own in his cot but since moving to a toddler bed we have to stay until he's asleep or he gets out of bed and gets upset and we have to repeat bedtime all over again

Would he accept a Gro Clock? As in, when the sun is up he can come into your bed?

We got one at around 18 months for our DD1, and she immediately took to it and knows not to shout for us to get her up (unless there’s an issue, obviously) until the sun comes up at 6am. She’s 2.10 now and I can see us keeping this thing until she can tell the time!

Just let him sleep in your bed?

From the perspective of emotional intelligence, 2 is too young to be in a bed. Cot sides give a sence of safety and security. Also they don't develop the emotional maturity to rationalise staying in bed and self comforting as a better option that safety and security - which he now gets from cuddles rather than cot sides.

So my advice would be bring the cot back.

If that's not possible, then accept he needs you for that safe/secure feeling - until he matures a bit more. Find a way that accepts this and works for you all - room sharing in his room or bed sharing in yours. But set it up more perminanly so you all get better sleep.

I feel you. My son was exactly the same, he will go off to sleep in his cot no problem but most nights he's waking looking to get in the bed since being back from holidays. He's also been quite sick so haven't minded putting him in the bed. But I end up getting no sleep after a few nights of it.

I think it must be a 2 year regression or something and they just want to he next to us. What I've started to do is lying him next to me in the bed and then carrying him into his cot and he sleeps rest of the night in there, you could try this?

Is he also looking for bottles all the time now too, which he never had a dependency of because we never fed him to sleep.

Any advice welcome!

What we did with ours was that they could get to our bed if if was early in the morning but in the middle of the night they get put back to bed 6am ok, 3am not!

Just let him sleep with you.