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Sleep

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Original poster

6 week old wont nap unless held.. help!

25 replies

SundayTwizzle · 23/09/2021 10:16

My baby is almost 6 weeks old and we are really struggling to get her to nap during the day. She will fall asleep while feeding or after being rocked but the minute I put her down in her bedside cot or moses basket her eyes ping open and within a few minutes she is screaming. The frustrating thing is I know she is tired because in the few minutes between her waking and crying she yawns and scrunches her face up.

She will sleep for ages in the sling or car but only if we are moving. DH is back at work now after paternity leave and I'm finding it really hard to do basic things like get washed/dressed, feed the dog, brush my teeth, go the loo. My days just seem to consist of me holding her.

Once she gets really worked up the only thing that really soothes her is breastfeeding so I was wondering if perhaps a bottle of formula once a day might get her to sleep a bit longer? Or any other tips would be hugely appreciated!

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Original poster

SundayTwizzle · 23/09/2021 10:18

I dont even get breakfast anymore as I havent time to make anything

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BebesChamber · 23/09/2021 10:18

This is completely normal and I was in the same position 6 weeks ago. Formula won't change this.
Just ride out the contact naps, soon they will have more hours of awake time where you can get housework bits done.
Make the most of it!

Himawarigirl · 23/09/2021 10:24

This is normal, some babies are just like this. My eldest was. Naps were on me in a carrier and she had to have movement or she woke up. So that was lots of walking or I would bounce on a gymnastics/birthing ball so that I could at least sit down and eat and relax a bit while she napped. Probably not what you want to hear as it is very hard. She did get better and would go in a pushchair around 3 months but it still had to be moving for the whole nap. Eventually she was able to sleep in her Moses basket around 4 months. But in the early weeks I was so envious of mums meeting for coffee and just parking up their buggies with sleeping babies. That was a world away from my experience. It will get better but there may not be much you can do at this point. The type of milk she has won’t have much influence on her need for movement and contact with you while sleeping.

Babamamananarama · 23/09/2021 10:24

This is completely normal - hard but normal! Moses baskets are bloody useful in my opinion, I've never managed to get a baby to sleep in one. They want and need to be close to you at that age.

One thing that helped with my daughter was swaddling her in a blanket - have you tried that?

Otherwise, using a sling means baby can nap and you can be up doing something else.

Or just accept that you are going to spend an amount of time every day snuggling a sleeping baby on the sofa. Make sure you have drinks/snacks/Netflix and enjoy the cuddles.

Himawarigirl · 23/09/2021 10:25

As pp said, naps will space out and it will pass and get easier.

Babamamananarama · 23/09/2021 10:28

Have you got a bouncy chair? I used to put my babies in the bouncy chair in the bathroom awake while I had a shower. They were fine as long as I was chatting to them. Ditto in the kitchen while you are making breakfast.
It is so hard at the start but it really does get easier week by week as they start being more alert and happy to be in the world.

Italiandreams · 23/09/2021 10:29

No many ideas but sympathy! I also have a six week old who wants to be held all the time , and a toddler! Constant feeling of guilt and very low standards when it comes to housework and personal care. Having been through it with my eldest I know it will get better, just hang in there and enjoy the baby cuddles.

mynameiscalypso · 23/09/2021 10:30

Bouncy chair saved my sanity at the same age.

CallMeRisley · 23/09/2021 10:31

Normal. Definitely try a sling or wrap.

Tibtab · 23/09/2021 10:32

I got a soft sling wrap and wore DD around the house at that age. They are still super young and obviously need a bit more contact.
It’s frustrating when all you want to do is sleep too!

FusciasBright21 · 23/09/2021 10:33

Yeah totally normal.
Get partner to make you up a sandwich before he leaves for work and keep snacky bits handy.
Park yourself on the sofa with the remote and phone handy and make the most of nap time.

I used to put DC bouncy chair in the bathroom and shower regardless of whether they were alseep or not. Crying for ten minutes wasn't going to hurt her, and I needed a shower to feel human.

I ignored cleaning/dishes etc. As DH would do them in the evenings. Would often manage to get the washing machine loaded but not unloaded.

It gets better although my DC didn't ever do long naps until starting at nursery at 11 months.

DGFB · 23/09/2021 11:20

Thus is normal, get a bouncy chair but don’t expect her to nap in it much. They just like to be held at this stage for naps, usually until about six months old.
There’s nothing wrong with your baby, as they get older they learn to nap

olympicsrock · 23/09/2021 11:35

It’s often babies with reflux that hate to be put down. Try making sure they are propped up.

IncyWincySpiderOnRepeat · 23/09/2021 12:08

Totally normal for the first couple of months, a soft sling carrier might help, I loved our Caboo at that age.

Another thing to try is a baby swing? You can often pick these up really reasonably on buy & sell sites.

Bouncy chair in the bathroom whilst you shower is also a very good call, mine often used to grizzle a bit and then fall asleep to the noise of the water. Definitely worth a try, I always felt so much more human for showering every day.

Read up on the fourth trimester, it explained a lot to me. It does get easier!

Pickle2021 · 23/09/2021 12:15

Yep very normal. Look up 4th trimester. My LO didn't have contact naps from about 4/4.5 months old and that was hard work to get.

Packed lunch at the ready would be my advice. Netflix and chill

In mornings before oh goes to work. Do basic stuff like shower and feed dog make lunch night before. It doesn't last promise.

Try bouncy chair or pram moving. But I couldn't get these until as mentioned above.

It doesn't last I promise x

EnidFrighten · 23/09/2021 12:18

With the exception of dressing, you could do everything you mention with your baby in a sling. You can even cook at arm's length!

Formula won't make a difference. Babies evolved to want to be held - imagine in prehistoric times, a baby left on the floor was vulnerable to predators. We evolved to want to be held.

EL1984 · 23/09/2021 14:31

Check out the parent and baby coach online course for newborns ... she covers this kind of thing.
Also has free podcast

Pickle2021 · 23/09/2021 16:50

Oh and i just remembered. She goes in her bouncer upstairs while I have a shower, she is very happy to do that 🤦🏼‍♀️ though initially I gave my LO to oh.

I didn't take long in shower at that point but now I take as long as I like and she couldn't care less x

Pickle2021 · 23/09/2021 16:52

Make sure you go toilet before nap. And sorry to say once or twice I was desperate and have gone while holding her asleep 😳😳

firstimemamma · 23/09/2021 16:56

Mine napped on me until ten months. 6 weeks is tiny! Just been born.

Margo34 · 23/09/2021 16:58

Ahhh, I miss those 4th trimester snuggles. Get snacks within reach and a flask/water bottle, phone charger, and the TV remote. Stick your feet up, watch This Morning and Homes Under the Hammer.....or a series on Prime or Netflix.

Shower in the evening and just chuck some clean clothes on in the morning as soon as you get up. Or, stick baby in a bouncy chair in the bathroom as someone above suggested while you shower, the running water will be like white noise!

But most importantly, lower your expectations. Achieve one thing in a day (one of which could be....getting showered during the day).

Relax and cuddle that baby. Congratulations!! ❤️

EmmaInParis · 23/09/2021 20:32

If she likes motion have you thought about a swing? I used a Graco Glider Lite with mine and it was my absolute saviour. She’d nap for hours in it when nothing else worked. Not recommended for unsupervised naps but it meant I could potter about and get stuff done without being nap trapped on the sofa x

Goosey345 · 23/09/2021 22:30

My baby is 9 weeks old and pretty similar. Though now she will stay asleep in sling when I'm sat still or sometimes in car seat after car stopped so there has been progress! Definitely getting gradually slightly easier each week as she can stay awake a bit longer between naps and happier to be put down when not asleep.

As suggested by another poster I've got a close caboo sling which she'll snooze for ages in and means I can walk around and do stuff. Essential as I have a toddler too.

My eldest one was completely different and would never settle when held and only wanted to sleep in a crib in a dark room! To be honest that could brought its own stress too because I felt trapped at home. So frustrating as it can feel, I really think this is a totally normal phase and will be a distant memory before long. It's really hard though I agree.

GotToGoBye · 23/09/2021 22:55

Can you breastfeed her with you lying down on your bed and creep away?

Original poster

SundayTwizzle · 24/09/2021 09:58

Thank you for the suggestions- going to attempt the shower bouncer one shortly!

Seems like I'm not alone in this - all the people who gave me the old 'sleep when she sleeps' advice clearly didnt have the same problem though

Swaddling works well at night but less so in the day. I'm looking into a swing as well. In the mean time I will pop her in the carrier around the house today so i can hopefully get a few more things done.

@GotToGoBye I dont have enough boob for this unfortunately!

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