Do we need to sleep train?

[Nix99]

Pretty sure dd is going through the 4 month sleep regression (turned 4 months yesterday) At the moment we are rocking/ feeding to sleep and tbh I dont really have a problem doing this. The issue I have is she is taking 30 minute naps and then getting overtired come evening because she's not had enough sleep. Do we need to sleep train for her to be able to connect sleep cycles or will this just come as she gets older? Also did anyone find their DC started putting themselves to sleep without sleep training; basically if we don't sleep train are we going to have to help her to sleep for years?

No idea but following as LO about to be 4 months!

I'm not against sleep training (did it with my 1st at 13months, tried it with my 2nd too) but 4 months is far far too small to even think about it

I think 4 months is too little to sleep train hardcore so to speak. I did encourage independent sleep though. Putting lo into cot fully awake and getting them to sleep that way. I was there the entire time hand in chest while tapping dummy, which teaches self soothing. Advice I got from MN

4 month sleep regression. This is utterly normal and will have a developmental root.

4 months is far too young to sleep train in any way.

I'm not too bothered about sleep training at all let alone with her this young but is she likely to start sleeping for longer (as only naps for 30 minutes and sleeps at night for 2 hours at a time) once the regression is over on her own or do I need to do anything to help with extending the sleep cycles at this point? Thank you

I would start trying to encourage her to fall asleep independently- so into cot awake with a dummy to soothe and do all settling in the cot. Sleep training I would consider closer to 6 months if you’re still having problems.

Oh and neither of mine did naps longer than 45 minutes until nearly 6 months, the youngest still only does longer naps for nursery. Both really good sleepers overnight though so I’m not sure there’s a connection at that age.

I'm getting myself confused now. I thought getting baby to fall asleep independently was sleep training. Is sleep training something different? Sorry getting in a pickle with it all

Waking isn’t a problem, it’s perfectly normal baby behaviour. There’s nothing wrong with her and you’re doing the right thing by meeting her needs.

Linking sleep cycles and sleeping longer are as developmental as eating solids, walking, talking. If your one year old was stumbling while trying to walk you’d comfort and support them, not leave them to get upset, struggle and try to get stronger legs or better balance straight away.

At 4 months you’re best off doing whatever makes life easier for you and your baby, cuddle her, rock her, feed to sleep, think about cosleeping if it means you’ll get more rest.

You’re doing great! She’s being a completely normal 4 month old, you’re caring for and comforting her which is what a good mum does and is what she needs

@Nix99 yes she's definitely going to need to some help learning to connect sleep cycles I did it at 6 months as I couldn't take it anymore I stayed with her the whole time
Til she fell asleep but didn't lift her out of the cot or spoke I just shushed her and gentle rubbed her tummy or back

@Nix99

I'm getting myself confused now. I thought getting baby to fall asleep independently was sleep training. Is sleep training something different? Sorry getting in a pickle with it all

They do that in their own time, you can’t make them sleep independently, it’s just one of those things they get better at by themselves. It’s like eating, crawling, potty training. They’re all steps along the way to your child becoming independent. It’s not something you can make them do. Least of all so tiny.

As pp said, I encouraged longer sleep cycles every single time and now my LO has generally got hang of it, can always have an off period etc. We can't get past 2 sleep cycles but better then nothing 🤷🏼‍♀️

Sit back, relax, stop worrying and accept your lo for who they are. My first needed movement for sleep and my second has his thumb. They're all totally different so I suggest you sit back and go with the flow.

I personally think there is a difference between gently encouraging them to link a sleep cycle and actually sleep training which doesn’t have to, but more often than not, involves crying. But I suppose gentle encouragement could be considered gentle training… Gahhh now I’m in a pickle! But my point was that I wouldn’t do anything like Ferber or CC before 6 months.

How are you getting her down for naps? Mine needed either sling or to be walked to sleep in the pram (and then would sleep in the garden)

If she sleeps in the sling or on me I can get her to sleep a bit longer and I'm happy to do this for now but obviously not forever. If I put her in the pram I try to push her back and forth just before the 30 minutes but she will still wake at the 30 minute mark. A few people have said not to sleep train but to encourage falling asleep independently but what do you do if dc starts to cry and get upset? Also with the comments about encouraging them to link sleep cycles how have people tried to do this? Ive tried shhing and patting when she gets to the end of the cycle but she can never seem to push into the next one or stay in it enough to get in to sleep sleep again.

My DD didn’t learn to link sleep cycles until she was almost 7 months. I didn’t do anything special, I’d always go in at the 30 minute mark, give her her dummy and pat and shush. It rarely worked but then one day it did and she started napping for 90+ minutes.

Love this! As a FTM I’m constantly fearful I’m going to still be feeding, rocking, shusshing & patting to sleep at 5yo. Currently doing all the above & co-sleeping, both DD & I are much happier but I really miss my SO as he’s in our bedroom & we’re in the nursery. I have to believe one day we’ll get there so thank you!

With both of mine, they went through a 30 (45 max) minutes naps until they were a bit older (7/8 months) and then they naturally started napping longer. I read that's very normal so never questioned it, although I always wished for longer naps! I just kept to wake windows any made sure they had multiple naps a day so they didn't get overtired. I think at 4 months they'd have been on 4/5 naps a day. I personally wouldn't sleep train at that age, IMO it's too young.