Early rising

[IDontLikeMondays88]

My 13 month old sleeps through the night but since he started nursery gets up very early. Today he was up at 4.50. He will not go back down even with a feed. This whole week he’s been up at 5/5.30. The latest tea been up recently is 5.45.

What can I do? I have someone coming out to measure for better black out blinds in case that is the issue.

We have a record 3.30 today… follow isn’g for advice. 😂

I Am so frustrated by it

Feel like I am starting off the weekend on minimal sleep and look like shit

My daughter is 7, the only thing that worked for me is going to bed earlier myself! She sleeps past 6am most days now but doesn't go to bed until 8.30/9ish so I have to choose between having an evening or getting enough sleep.

My husband is saying we just need to be in bed earlier but inevitably we aren’t!

My friend send me a text book that says if your baby wakes early you stand outside their room and tel them to go back to sleep until they calm down. Can assure you my son would not be calmed by this! So have discounted that

What do you do when he wakes?

My DD 2.5 is exactly the same. Hasn't slept later than 6PM since the beginning of the year. It's usually somewhere between 5-5:30. Going to bed later doesn't help, still wakes up at the same time. I'm starting to get used to it now although some days I really struggle to get up. She doesn't nap anymore either so it's such a long day.

You probably aren't going to want to hear this but it could be a coincidence and your LO might just an early riser.... 5am isn't unusual. Their sleep does develop and progress towards adult sleep so it's not unfeasible that this is just the next developmental step.

But I do also recognise that 5am is early to an adult, I would adjust your bedtime x

Forgot to say I have to pretty much make my DH go to bed early some days and it is really annoying but has to been done otherwise I am grumpy the next day

Sounds counter-intuitive but have you tried waking him briefly earlier and then letting him go back to sleep? My daughter went through a phase of this, but if she woke briefly an hour or so before her getting up time, she then tended to go back to sleep for longer. It's called the Wake to Sleep method I believe.

I really don't think standing out their room and telling them to go back to sleep is going to work, that's basically just CIO sleep training which I don't agree with but also seems a bit pointless if your LO has had all the sleep they need for the night.

Should also say am not criticising you as I know you aren't going to do that, more passing comment on the book

My children all woke early until teens, sorry!

I just started going to bed earlier when the kids were little, because it is a losing battle trying to force them to sleep. So I agree with your DH.

Either switch to a later bedtime for them, or an earlier rising for you. If they need 10 hours sleep, that is 7-5, 8-6, 9-7. If you have a child who needs less, you can't change that really.

I had one child who always needed two hours less than the others .

When he wakes I leave him for a little bit to see if he’ll resettle. Maybe ten mins or something. Today I then went through to rub his back which seemed to settle him. Went back to bed and then 5 mins later he was up again 🤷🏼‍♀️🤷🏼‍♀️
Sometimes I will feed him (still breastfeeding) - did that this morning and he didn’t seem hugely hungry
Sometimes we bring him into bed with us but again he will seem tired for a bit but then get up and crawl around the bed.
Nothing works.
I feel frustrated that I just need to go to bed at 9 or something - we have no time to ourselves.
I also wonder if he can be possibly getting enough sleep as he is getting 9/10 hours rather than 11/2 hours. He does still nap during the day. If at nursery he will nap for a maximum of 2 hours over 2 naps (but often less at nursery). When he’s with us he might do 3 hours over two naps)

@Mattieandmummy I completely agree - I read it and thought what a stupid suggestion

And yes DD would have responded one way to me standing outside and telling her go to back to sleep: the phrase air raid siren comes to mind!

It does get better, she's still an early riser now but more of the 6am variety than 4:45 and that extra hour or so makes all the difference!

Let me know if you find out!

My eldest is 3 and stays in bed with a groclock, which might be an option for you when your baby is older. My 2 year old wouldn't give a groclock any attention and is up at 5.30am. We take it in turns on the weekend, so at least one day there's a lie in (till about 7.30 )

I feel frustrated that I just need to go to bed at 9 or something - we have no time to ourselves. Unfortunately, this is normal for parents of young children.

3 out of 4 of my children are like this. The 11 month old is the biggest culprit at the moment! Only my oldest (who is only nearly 5) has never done this! We've tried everything : blackout blinds, white noise, leaving them, less naps, more naps, later bedtime etc etc.
We have never found the solution. Sometime after age 2, they seem to get better and sleep until at least 6!
I've just got used to lack of sleep 😆

My 3.5 year old is a permanent early riser. Most mornings between 5-5.30, the occasional spell of 4.30 (ish) and very very rarely 6am. He has only ever slept past 6.30 if he is ill. The time he goes to bed has no influence on it. It’s just how he’s made. I do think that for some children it can be a phase but for many more it’s just who they are until they grow up a little bit. All you can do is accept it and adapt your plan to suit- I always make sure I’m in bed and generally asleep by 10/1030 at the latest, often earlier. I also never do housework/jobs etc in the evening- I accept that I’m too tired. I am incredibly productive in the mornings though. I’ve tried everything to move his wake up time later and that’s far more stressful than acceptance. You have my sympathies though, it is hard but you do and will adapt if it is prolonged.

I suspect you may need to drop to one nap? Or cut the naps short. 13-15 months is prime time to start dropping to one nap for most kids. It's a longish process - takes a week or so to see a difference usually.

So I suppose my comment about having no time for ourselves comes from the fact that we are often doing chores in the evening. So we get him to bed at 7 have dinner ourselves tidy up etc and suddenly it’s 9pm and basically I might just need to them go to bed as I will be getting up at 5 😩

DD17 used to wake up at 4 every day when she was a baby/younger toddler. Eventually, as she got older, she started waking up at 5. By the time she started school it has become 6. She is still an early riser now. She gets up at 6:30 on school days even though she doesn't need to get up til 7 or even 7:10.

I think for many children it is just in their nature to get up at silly o'clock. For teenagers it is the opposite.

As others have said, OP, I think your only option is to go to bed earlier .

For me yes it’s the chores that make a difference. I work PT (3days) so the dining table becomes a dumping ground and I sort it on my days off. Washing/housework etc gets done in the mornings or before I go to work if possible. I also often pre cook dinners in the day- for example last night I made a curry in the day and then all we had to do was reheat it and boil rice. The washing up gets done and left to dry and I’ve then put it away this morning. I do a quick wipe of kitchen surfaces with wipes in the evening and a proper clean in the morning. I also do a mix of quick dinners/meals previously cooked and defrosted and meals I can cook in the morning for work days. It just means my whole day has shifted forward. Equally, I absolutely accept that for some people the early morning is just not their time- I don’t mind it too much but DH can’t cope with it at all. Organisation is key in our home- packed lunches made the evening before, bags packed for pre school/work etc. No running around looking for shoes/keys etc.

Oh and the ability to say no- for example if DH says “let’s watch another episode” or similar and it’s already 9.30, I’ll usually decline, even when I want too- because I know it will make me going to bed later but 5 am will still be there. On the occasions I ‘stay up’ until 11 or so with DH I know that I will struggle more the next day because at 5-5.30 I’ll still hear “Morning mummy”

My DD wakes at 5 and goes to bed at 7, DP does bedtime whilst I cook then we eat at 7, watch TV til 9 then one or both of us goes to bed for 9.30 and we alternate who gets up with her. It is a bit shit but I've kind of learnt to be grateful for that 2 hour bit of evening and adjust my expectations accordingly! I tend to use her early wake time to do household chores as she's happier to entertain herself that time of the day.

Not a very Mumsnet thing to admit but I would go downstairs with my son put fireman Sam etc on the tv and nap on the sofa. I obviously didn't get "proper" sleep but even the dozing half asleep naps helped.