toddler nightmares - can anyone advise?

[NorthLondonMum72]

second daughter, now 20 months has always been a very self-contained little girl both awake and asleep, but in the last few weeks started waking every night, 3 or 4 times, screaming. I think it's from terror, there doesn't seem to be anything physically wrong. She shares a room with her sister (nearly 5) and so I've taken to bringing her in to sleep with me so not to wake the other but it's killing me - she's awake distressed off and on thru the night and then up permanently from around 5. I'm working full time at the moment too and temporarily a single parent (husband working away). How can I work out what's frightening her and get her back to sleep? Sanity is hanging by a thread! Has anyone any advice?

I just used to let DS come into bed with us when this happened....
But it is very disturbing of sleep.
Sorry I can't help. Just letting you know that you are probably in good company.

any minute soon you will find you're in good company (lots)
mine all did this, DD (almost two) still doing it sometimes. I think it's when they first start dreaming about 'nasties' like giants and monsters or something. mine have also had a brief re-visit at 4-ish. i did the same as you, put them in bed with me, lots of cuddles. the only way to stay sane!!
good luck, it will pass. hope someone else has something really useful though, i have no good ideas i'm sorry!!

Hi im in just the same boat! Ds 2.6, is adamant there are gorillas in his room and refuses to sleep in there.
He has now come into out bed for nearly two weeks. It cant go on, really need some advice on how to get him back in there! Im worried that he'll still be getting into our bed when hes 16! Seriously though need some help please.

thing that works best is for you to show him how to get rid of the gorillas. Scare them away with your special mummy spell and then show him that all ways into the room are blocked. Then teach him the spell as well. They won't be convinced that gorillas (or dragons or wolves are not there) but they can be convinced that they can go away with magical spells or saying "boo" or waving hands.

Night terrors are often not linked to any one thing in particular and can just be a sleep disorder. We had this with ds and it can be very distressing not to mention exhausting when you get a run of them. You're always advised not to disturb them and let them be as waking/moving can make it worse. That's easier said than done - but sometimes we did just have to let ds cry it out because no matter what we did he wouldn't settle. If you think there is something that could be bothering here then try and avoid that scenario. Soothing bedtime routine etc. It does get better and sooner or later they will subside. Ds's did not last long at all and now he simply has bad dreams which he can tell us about and we can work through with him. Has this started happening since your husband began working away or before?

thanks, i thought about doing that but wasn't sure if it would make him think about it even more. Ill give it try though!

No imo dreams are about teaching them to deal with fear and learn to control their imaginations. Magic spells are not denial are the way to go

This happened to a friend of my and they stopped giving their dd milk before bed and the nightmares stopped almost at once.

We've got this at the mo but I put it down to illness/teething/being cold/being hot. DS2 is 18 months. At the same time DS1 (4) has been waking once a night complaining of being too hot or too cold or having a dream. We're all over the place but fortunately there are two of us.

Sympathies to you and not sure if this helps at all but tonight remember there are lots of us awake with you so you're not alone.

Thanks all for such sound advice. Nice to hear that there are others in the same boat (or is this a bit shauden-whatsit?)! Just when I thought I couldn't cope anymore - the evening I posted the message - we had a full night's sleep, thank God. But since then it's started again and I'm beginning to think that perhaps it's 'night terrors' rather than bad dreams as she's thrashing about and sometime has eyes open but doesn't seem awake - doesn't appear to recognise me even and certainly doesn't want hugs or comforting. But when I read about N terrors they say that it would occur at around the same time in the sleep pattern every night. That's not the case with us - does anyone have any experience with terrors?
Re: Count To Ten's question - they started before husband left but have definately got worse since. Perhaps there is a link there. Back together as a family in a couple of days so hopefully that'll help.