2 year old wakes at 4 30am every day. How do I get him out of this habit and sleeping later?

[DarkGreen]

It is killing me I just feel so tired all the time. He's has done this for over a year every single day. I just don't know how to change his body clock effectively to not think 4am is wake up time??

What do you do at 4am when he wakes up? Can you just ignore him or silently put him back to bed each time, not engaging with him at all (even if it takes a few nights of multiple times going in a resettling him with no engagement with him)?

Does he have blackout blinds?
Is he going to bed with a full tummy?
What do you do when he wakes at 4am?

Run us through your daily routine and maybe we can help.

I was going to blame the dawn chorus (bloody birds wake DS up every day at 4.30 at the moment). But I see it’s been all year so it can’t be that.

My dd was also an early riser and still is at 4 (sorry). I set a rule no leaving the bedroom til 5.30 so they can read stories or play quietly if they really can’t get back to sleep but cannot start the day til at least 5.30

Will he come into bed with you and go back to sleep?

I have one too who is up between 5am and 6am every day. It's exhausting.

What’s his daily routine?
Does he by any chance go for an early nap?

We bought a groclock to help our DD (1.5) understand the difference between day and night. She still wakes early occasionally (and I go to check the problem) but she is starting to understand that she will not leave her cot until “Ollie wakes up” (7am).

My guess is a later bedtime is needed.

Later bedtime doesn't work in my experience. Tried and tested. Often they wake even earlier.

Groclock doesn't work for my two either, they just try and unplug it.

What time does he go to bed? DD slept for a total of 11 hours at that age, 9 hours at night and 2 in the day. Let's just say she didn't go to bed at 7.....

The attached pic is what I was given ages ago by a friend who used a sleep consultant. All three of mine don't wake before 6:30am and sleep through (unless unwell), and go to bed between 7 and half past.
We do however, follow this routine to the letter, despite how monotonous it is.... and now my 2.5yr old only naps for 45mins during the day

When he wakes at 4 he is wide awake, he comes into my bed and says morning mummy. If I try to return him him his bed or even bedroom he has a really big tantrum so I'm in the habit of letting him in my bed and watches my ipad after about 20 mins of cuddles. I do this so he doesn't tantrum and wake the neighbours up.

He naps 1-2.30 and he is in bed for 7 but takes 30 mins to go to sleep but lies chatting to himself

I hear you OP ,my daughter is an early riser too. No routines work as she is nursery 5 days a week, all day. She wakes between 430-530am every day. No other words than it does get better with time. My DS was the same- clicked out of it at about 3.5, he’s a 6am riser, and for us that is fine no issues with that at all

If he sleeps 7.30 - 4.30 plus 1-2.30, that's 10.5 hours, which may be all he needs - have you tried shifting when you put him to bed?

I'd work on a gradually shorter lunch nap.
As PP said 10.5 hrs in 24 is reasonable.
This is only based on our lad who's on a strict 30min max, for the same reason!

I agree with dropping the nap. We had the exact same thing and were told to limit nap to 45 mins. It worked after a month or so.

Sorry not dropping nap but shortening - similar to what @mumjustmum said. It's utterly awful, I really sympathise!

We follow @mumjustmum's routine almost exactly, except for the wake up time - my DD still wakes at 4.30am 😭 No advice OP, just solidarity, it's horrendous and will be even worse as the mornings get darker, at least now it's light at that time.

Is he closer to 2 than 3? Exact age is important - we dropped the nap slowly from 2.5 and it was gone by 3 apart from the occasional nap in the car. I’d bring the nap earlier slightly and shorten to an hour, especially if 2.5 or older. Also, we were advised that screen time after waking was something that was likely to reinforce the early waking and to avoid it first thing and after around 4pm at that age.

Looking at that sheet I agree with everything on it, especially the fresh air. Get them out the house morning and afternoon. It's the only thing that worked for all of our children consistently.

Have you tried lightly rousing him at 3am? I know you’d have to get up to do it but if you do that for a few nights then you might reset his sleep cycles?

My 3yr old is the same, can't keep him awake past 7.30pm, no naps in the day now and he wakes between 4 and 5 everyday. I thought full time nursery would help but no he slept in until 6 a couple of days a week the first 3-4 weeks and back to the early starts. He is completely awake in the morning too often singing or talking at full volume before he wanders in our room.

The last week he's got into our bed for cuddles most mornings and lasted to 6am (whoop whoop).

I'm dreading the school holidays when he's not as active in the day.

If you find a solution let me know but just know you're not alone in sleep deprivation.

I think the key is routine here 100% and putting child back to bed/your bed and dare i say, give kiddo a bottle/drink of milk and back to sleep. Not ideal but worked for me to re-arrange the routine then eventually drop said bottle/cup

i agree with the 7-7 routine, be super strict and it will work, also cut the naps down a lot