How to get 8 month old to sleep on his own?

[YoungMummy97]

Hi very tired mummy here.

My DS is 8 months old, such an active boy. Climbs everything and has my house wrecked😂 He is very sucked on me, he’s usually never far from me, e.g if I’m doing the dishes he will come sit at my feet or if I’m hoovering get will crawl around behind me.

It makes bed time a nightmare.. I made the terrible mistake of letting him into my bed one night when he wasn’t feeling well and now he doesn’t want to leave. He put himself to sleep and would sleep an 8 hour stretch every night up until 4 months old, now that he is in my bed he is up 4-5 times a night. I’ve tried controlled crying (putting him down half-asleep and leaving the room but not letting him cry for longer than 5 minutes at a time) however this wasn’t for me.. (think it broke my heart more than his😔). He has a set routine of bath, book, bottle then bed at the same time every night but if I move the slightest bit when he is sleeping then his eyes open. Sometimes I can get him down and he will sleep by himself for around an hour then he is up crying for me to come cuddle him. I hate it when he cries because he is usually a very happy smiley boy until bed time😔

It means I’m in bed for 7:30pm every night and never really get anytime to myself or time with my partner alone to even watch a movie.. he wakes around every 2.5 hours sometimes every hour, sometimes for a wee drink and gets snuggled back into me to go back to sleep.

Does anyone have any tips to help get him to stay in his own cot?

Is the cot in your room?

Have you considered a sidecar cot? (One side removed off a normal full-size cot and butted up to your bed)

Yes his cot is in my room at the minute, we live in a one bedroom (hoping to move very soon). He was in the sleep beside me cot until he was 4 months but after bringing him beside me he doesn’t want to sleep on his own.

It’s totally my own fault for starting him with the habit in the first place (my bed is suuuper comfy😂). Kicking the habit is proving to be very hard, hate to see him so upset and it’s so unfair that he can see me from the cot when I’ve tried putting him in it

When he was in the sleep beside me cot he would try to climb over into my bed and would stand up in the cot. He could roll over, crawl and stand by 4.5 months he is one determined little guy

We had an IKEA cot with the mattress high but a side off, butted it up to our bed and cable-tied the frames together so it couldn’t slip away, then push his mattress tight against yours, rolled up towel down the resulting gap, cot sheet over mattress and towel to keep it all neat. Then you can hold hands/cuddle in bed without sacrificing quite so much space.

If he’s really intrepid, bed guard on the far side of your bed so he can’t fall out.

@YoungMummy97

When he was in the sleep beside me cot he would try to climb over into my bed and would stand up in the cot. He could roll over, crawl and stand by 4.5 months he is one determined little guy

The idea is to cuddle him whilst in the cot.

The huge benefit of a full sized cot as a sidecar cot is that you can physically fit your whole torso into the cot with baby. Cuddle him to sleep in there, literally wrapped around him. Then extract yourself back to bed once asleep.

These are a fab ideas I never thought to take the side off his big cot, I’ll give it a go and see how he gets on thanks. Suppose it will get him used to the cot also. Fingers crossed🤞🏼

It’s a game changer. Even if he ends up in the middle you can sleep with your bum in the cot and gain enough space to actually sleep without having to cling to the edge of the bed all night. Total lifesaver in our house.

There are tutorials around if you want to do a fancy job, but as long as there are no gaps for little one to slip into and it’s all stable you’ll be fine.

I certainly wouldn't be going to bed at 7.30 every evening. I'd just keep him downstairs with me and husband until he falls asleep, then carry him up.

I have tried just letting him stay with us in the livingroom until he falls asleep but he will stay awake until we go to bed. Then he is crying constantly because he is over tired.. he fights his sleep to the point of heaving with all the crying, it’s awful.

It’s just easier for me to go to bed with him rather than him staying up until 11/12 and being completely shattered