Overtired toddler following 2to1tansition how to help?

[Stacii]

Hi all

My almost 18 month old ds has successfully been on 1 nap for a couple of weeks now. Initially it was going really well, he fell naturally into:

6.20 wake
11-1.30 nap
7.30 bed

But, the last few days its going horribly wrong. He has started only taking 1hour30-45 nap. I have tried putting him to bed earlier, but he doesn't fall asleep until 7.30. He wakes crying after about an hour. He also has started waking at 5am ish. Yesterday I gave him a bottle (he always has a morning bottle usually on wake though) around 6 and left him to it, he dropped back off 6.30-7.15. Today he kicked up a fuss but I'm currently sat watching the monitor and can see that he's shattered, but he's fighting harder so will probably just end up getting him up soon.

I should also mention he has stopped self settling since dropping the nap too, he's gone back to being held in the baby carrier. Although he can also go to sleep with me next to him. But leaving the room (as we had been doing for over a month pre transition) just leaves him upset. if he wakes between cycles when napping he rolls back over and goes to sleep. I'm not sure if this plays a park in all this.

Until the last few days he had been getting over an extra hour per 24, going down with out a fuss, generally so much better on the new routine, I don't know what went wrong

So, please MN'ers, if you found yourself in this situation, what did you do? I don't know how to 'fix' it...

I should also mention he has been a proper little moaner in this time, whinging and crying which is really unlike him. He's usually super happy and content. He is going through a leap atm and has got a snotty nose too so whether these are factors, I'm not sure.

I think i might try for 2 naps today, which will mean late to bed. And hopefully a lie in tomorrow. Reset everything crosses fingers

My DCs always kept loose sleep schedules (eg fell asleep between 7 and 7.30pm, woke at some point between 6 and 7am), so this sounds very normal to me - it's all fairly small shifts in timings. Both went to 1 nap of around 1.5-2hrs at around 12mo, so I'm not seeing what the problem is there either?
I definitely wouldn't be doing 2 naps today. Personally, a slightly grumpy DC during the day is a better prospect than one that is still awake at 10pm tonight (energised from the extra nap), and then overtired the following day due to the late bedtime. On tired grumpy days I used to have a quiet hour - either reading books or putting the TV/a film on and snuggling on the sofa.

It took me 2 months to transition from 2 naps to 1 nap with my youngest child. I would do it along the lines of:

• After a good night, go for a single 1- nap day, whereby for the whole of the rest of the week it's "normal" 2- nap days.
• Have stand-alone 1- nap days a little more frequently. Say a 1- nap day followed by 3 or 4 days of 2-nap days, then another 1- nap day and so on
• After a run of non over-tired few days, have two 1- nap days back to back, then back to 2-nap days for catch-up.
• Move towards 1- nap days as "normal" and 2- nap days as only occasional when needed. For example:
• Two or three 1- nap days back to back, followed by a day or two of 2- nap days as catch up. Then...
• A row of two or three 1- nap days, with a single 1- nap day in between. So that there are only one or two 2- nap days in the week.
• A row of four or seven 1- nap days with a single 2- nap day for catch up in between as needed.
• Progress until over tired days when 2-nap are needed are less and less frequent until not at all.

My youngest daughter made this change between 20 and 22 months. So at 20 months all days were 2 naps and by 22 months all days were 1 nap.

If you have made this transition too suddenly, that may be the problem.

(Also, an aside to your question, going backwards on self settling at this age is not a good idea. It will become harder to undo as baby gets older)

Thanks both, interesting to see 2 different opinions.

Skanking - it's not slightly grumpy, he's literally crying and whinging constantly. Won't let me put him down at all. Completely out of character for him, these last 3-4 days you can see he's just knackered, and it's gotten progressively worse so I think he needs a good catch up.

FATE I was able to hold onto his 2 naps for another 4-6 based on your advice last time but bedtime just got so late, he was only having 8 hours over night, 2.5-3 during the day. In those weeks we probably had a 1 nap day each week, so it was similar to your suggestion. I also threw in a few 2 nap days over the 2-3 weeks of 1 nap days. It has been a couple of weeks of only 1 nap though so I think perhaps it has caught up with him. I had a gardener in for a couple of days banging away and I think that's what caused him to wake early from nap those couple of days.

Interestingly I put him down at 9.10 this morning and he is still sleeping, 2 hours 10 so far. Depending on when he wakes I could do ebt or 2nd nap, I'm a bit apprehensive about the ebt though as he's never done more than 11 hours straight through, and that is only recent (since dropping to 1 nap) prior to this it ranged 8-10 hours, so I'm scared that if I put him down at 6pm he'll be up at 4

I also did think that about the self settling, although it wasn't planned or pushed by me. 1 day he decided he didn't want to cuddle anymore so I went with it. I have found with the longer wake windows he struggles to get himself off as is too tired. I don't mind as it takes 5 minutes in the carrier,when I have tried laying next to him (since transition) it has taken over an hour, so I figured I'd wait for him to adjust to the new schedule and then work on the self settling again

He woke at 11.30 so had 2 hours 20 and has woke filled with joy, my happy little fellow is back so I definately think putting him down early was a good shout.

Now though I'm not sure whether to power through to an early night or give a quick power nap this afternoon. He probably won't sleep until around 5 now, so even if I woke him after 15 minutes were probably looking at 10 the earliest to bed.

Any thoughts? I wouldn't mind a later night to hopefully get him back to waking after 6 but I'm so exhausted after the last few days

Quick update for anyone searching similar threads, yesterday went like this:

5am wake
9.10-11.30 nap
4-4.20 nap (was woken)
9.20 sleep.

He is still currently asleep, he's never slept past 7.30 before. Anyway, we are back on track for 1 nap today. I feel so much less stressed knowing we can flick back to 2 naps when needed and reset things

Thats great news!

Sure is. Thanks for the advice

I did have to resettle him in yesterday's nap so I think you may also be right on the self settling front. What interesting is on the 2 nap day, after 20 minutes of laying with him on the night, I left the room. He went to sleep about 10 minutes later. When I have tried to do that one 1 nap days he gets upset