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Sleep

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Help with toddler sleep

2 replies

KFleming · 22/05/2021 20:41

DD is 23 months and for the past couple of months it’s been an absolute nightmare getting her to sleep.
I have absolutely no problem sitting in her room, or at the door, with her while she falls asleep. The problem is she doesn’t fall asleep for hours. She constantly grins at us, chats to us, asks for things, tells us she’s done a poo (she hasn’t, but she knows we’ll check her and she thinks this is funny) etc, we ignore most of this but it makes no difference to her. It’s taking about 4 hours+ to get her to go to sleep, and she wakes at 6am, so she’s constantly miserable because she’s having about 7 hours sleep.
But if we try to leave, she cries, really horrible distraught sobbing. But she does go to sleep (i’d guess in under 10 mins, we’ve only done it a couple of times out of sheer desperation), she doesn’t get out of bed. It feels horrible but is this better?? She’ll then have 11ish hours sleep and is happier in the day time. 2 months of 7 hours sleep a night almost every night must be taking its toll on her (it’s taking its toll on me!). She doesn’t nap much either, it’s about 15 mins a day at nursery, a bit longer on the weekends as we push her in the pram, and she’s just constantly exhausted and miserable.
Will this pass? It’s been 2 months and if anything it’s getting worse, not improving.

OP posts:
PaleGreenAndBrightOrange · 22/05/2021 20:45

She is definitely old enough for you to leave her crying. She’s old enough to know that you’re still in the house. If you’re not convinced, you could reassure her by going in and saying “go to sleep” in a soothing way every 5 mins.

I did the same with DD at 15 months. She started as a nightmare child at night and in 3 days was sleeping all night long ana taking 10 mins to get to sleep. She now is 3 and can’t wait for bedtime, never wants to sleep in our bed etc. I don’t believe any trauma has happened as a result of being left crying for 10 mins. Actually at the start it was more like 30.

Winkywonkydonkey · 22/05/2021 20:50

My 23 month old can be like this. The keyworker at nursery just said to be firm and consistent when the rolling around and kicking starts. So I just say no, go to sleep. If it goes on for more than a few minutes then I leave the room, he instantly cries so I return in about 30 secs but I say that if he doesn't go to sleep I will go downstairs and leave him to it, at which point he settles down. Being very straight faced and avoiding eye contact is the key. Dead pan "no, it's bed time" first few mins and then silence.

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