No sleep for me tonight!

[happyface42]

4.30am and my oh is due back to work tomorrow (today now) after his paternity leave. My nearly 4 week old has been up every hour, she has reflux so after every feed I have to keep her upright for 20 mins and she won't stop feeding and then I've found we are in a vicious wind cycle which I'm struggling to get out of her because she falls asleep until I put her down and she's up again!

I could cry. My DD1 will be up in an hour and a half she was a good sleeper so I'm not used to this and praying that it will end soon! Anyone having a similar night? Or had similar nights that are out of the other side? It's nights like this I feel my PND coming back

Oh OP it's so hard. My baby had reflux too so we had to do this, it's so frustrating when you know other people just pop their babies back down after feeding. It's a bit of a blur now (and mine is only six months!) and the thought of the nights in the early days makes me shudder a bit, but it definitely gets better and you will get through it, even if sometimes it doesn't feel like you will. I really do know how you feel.

Oh god it's horrible feeling I promise it does get better, my baby had this when newborn, it wore off at about 4 months and now coming up to 5 months still windy day and night but sleeps so much better most of the night now! Newborn baby's can be very overwhelming at first. You will get though it op.💐

I feel for you op, it’s tough when baby has reflux.
My DC has autism so doesn’t sleep much anyway but currently has a tummy bug so I’ve been cleaning up lots of sick all night and trying to keep him in one area. Lots of washing and cleaning to crack on with as my house is sticking.

Stinking

My husband went back to work today too! He decided at 2am to sleep on the sofa with the cat. I struggled to settle my two week old last night.

My first sounds more like yours though. She would never go in her bed and co-sleeping didn't work well as feeding lying down wasn't good as she had reflux. I tried to keep her upright for 30 minutes after a feed but she fed constantly. I got barely any sleep. But I surprised myself at how well I could function on barely any sleep and it only lasted a few weeks. The reflux improved and I could feed lying down and sleep at the same time. She was usually very good sleeper as a toddler.

Thank you for all the reassuring comments.
Last night was tougher than usual I just hope tonight is better.

@AegonT did you medicate your Dd reflux? I'm in two minds whether to call the gp today or just ride it out with her as I know it can be common in newborns. It's just I don't think I can ride it out with her for months but it sounds positive your LOs didn't last too long. She's coming up to be a month old this week so I'm also considering gripe water to see if that helps.

Is medication is an option then I would really advocate for it. My DD is on omeprazole and it's changed my life.
I dread to think the position I would be in if we didn't Medicate. My nights were like yours. With other kids to look after too. Plus seeing them in pain is heartbreaking.

It does get better I promise. DD3 is only 8 weeks old and we are down to one night feed and she goes back down after feeds.

@zippityzip

Is medication is an option then I would really advocate for it. My DD is on omeprazole and it's changed my life. I dread to think the position I would be in if we didn't Medicate. My nights were like yours. With other kids to look after too. Plus seeing them in pain is heartbreaking.

It does get better I promise. DD3 is only 8 weeks old and we are down to one night feed and she goes back down after feeds.

I've been considering asking my gp for the same as I've read lots about it but I wasn't sure if her reflux is classed as bad enough to medicate as she is still gaining weight and having plenty of dirty and wet nappies?

My DD has silent reflux so she's never sick but in constant pain.
Don't get me wrong it was a battle to get the omeprazole and I was told, try the expensive formula (that makes them constipated) or but infant Gaviscon (that also makes them constipated).
I pointed out to the GP that if there was an adult asking for help for reflux they would be medicated immediately so they didn't live in constant pain. Like yours she's gaining feeding and doing dirty/wet nappies but I couldn't sleep for more than 20 mins at a time and never put her down. The omep changed all that and I could finally enjoy my baby. You're at real risk of PND when that exhausted so it's definitely worth a shot.

You need to make sure you dh helps with sleep even if he is back at work. He will get less sleep and work fine, but you can’t get virtually zero sleep and look after baby and toddler (work) all day.

What time does he have to leave the house for work? Can he take over at say 5-7am, so you feed baby at 5am ish and then he takes downstairs to hold, and entertains toddler if they are awake before 7am. That way you get 2 ish hour nap to at least start the day on a tad more sleep.

@happyface42 Sorry you’re having a tough time 😓 I’ve been there and it’s awful! DS is now 6months and while his reflux is causing issues during the day, for some reason night is better 🤞🏼 I can now feed him and put him back down. He’s always been a gassy baby too! We tried Infacol before he was a month old but it made his gas worse. At about 6 weeks he started on Gripe Water. Definitely helped him to pass the gas easier so he wasn’t getting a sore tummy!

I would go to the GP about the reflux and see what they say. Mine was still gaining weight and having plenty wet and dirty nappies too but he was clearly uncomfortable! I was still breastfeeding when I originally went to the GP about it and they gave Infant Gaviscon which was horrendous. PITA to administer as it has to be freshly made up at each feed and administered with a syringe if you’re breastfeeding and DS wouldn’t take the syringe 🙄 it also made him really constipated which just added to his problem!

Mine suddenly developed complete breast refusal one day because he was uncomfortable when feeding. I had to switch to expressing every 2 hours day and night (😐) to express enough for him 😓 obviously with the constant feeding, expressing, having to hold him upright, washing/sterilising breast pumps I was getting about 15 mins sleep every 2 hours through the night if I was lucky and my milk supply tanked 😓 I was absolutely ruined so had to transition him to formula!

If you’re formula feeding then personally I would try the Anti-Reflux milk before any medication. Run it past your GP or HV first. It worked wonders for my DS and hasn’t caused any constipation! The only thing I was advised was to stick to the same brand that he was on and just change to the anti reflux version.

Oh I feel for you! Reflux is the worst! My DD had it and she was given infant gaviscon which sorted her out really well. I don't think GPs like to prescribe the 'proper medication' too early on so will ask you to try everything else first, then they'll suggest gaviscon and then the proper meds as a last resort. This is what I was told at least.

My DD is 8.5 months and still has reflux. Nights are better but we have unsettled evenings and early mornings. Naps got better but are currently going through a 'short' phase! 🙈

My daughter is on both gaviscon and Omeprazole as they do different things - she's still not perfect but much better than what she would be without them.

Reflux is really crappy and really affects your experience of being a mum. It doesn't last forever (usually) but it can drag on so I would advise finding ways to manage it if poss.

Join a reflux FB group as there is loads of advice on there (although obv use your common sense).

Thank you guys for all of your comments and suggestions I really appreciate them. I have taken the plung this morning after another hard night of trying to settle her back to sleep after her first wake up and called the gp (currently waiting for them to call me back).
She sounds in so much pain and discomfort I really feel for her. And I have a migraine which I find so difficult to shift even with medication (I think caused by the lack of sleep!)
I tried gripe water last night for the first time to see if it helped and she was so sick afterwards, it was quite scary just kept coming out of her and so much of it so I'm too scared to try that again now. Just praying that if the gp prescribes omeparzole that it works and her little tummy takes it ok. I really don't want to medicate her when she's still so young but feel like I don't have much of an option with her being so uncomfortable and it just seems to be getting worse the older she's getting.

@happyface42 oh bless her 😓 it’s awful to see them uncomfortable!! Have you had any luck with the GP?