Dilemma about where 3 month old DD should sleep

[naturelover]

Till now she's been in pram downstairs for daytime and evening naps, and moses basket in same room as me at night. Problem is, she's about to outgrow both pram and moses basket, so I suppose logically she should move into cot upstairs for her daytime and evening naps as well as at night. But I can't bear the thought of her being alone in a room as she's never been apart from me, and 3 months is still so young. She would still be in same room as me at night, but not for daytime or evening naps. The cot death suggestions are to be in same room for first 6 months, is that right? Presumably cot death could occur during the day as well as at night?

A couple of weeks ago DH suggested we put her upstairs in the evenings so she could "get used to having a regular bedtime" however she wouldn't settle, I couldn't relax, and we spent the whole evening up and down stairs trying to soothe her. She would only settle when we were with her. I insisted we let her nap in the pram in the evenings. Anyway, she was, and is, cluster feeding (exclusively bf) so to be honest evenings are pretty taken up with that.

I'd appreciate any comments, suggestions, advice based on your experiences. Thanks.

I'd keep her in the same room as you. You will sleep better knowing she is near...

My DD slept in her cot in het own room when she was 2 months old. and she was born 5 weeks early.
to prevent cotdeath, you put her down with her feet touching the base of the cot.
Get a monitor, so you can hear her.
I think it is best for babies to go into their own room. Mine has slept right throuh since then and both DH[ and I have a good nights rest. But not everyone does this. it is what makes you feel comfortable.
The first 4 months I got up most nights just to go and look if she is ok and if no one has stolen her.
It gets better

She will still sleep in same room as me. The dilemma is where to put her for daytime and evening naps once she's outgrown her pram. She's on 90th centile for her age and is very long! I really thought the pram was supposed to last first 6 months but she has maybe a few more weeks left in it!

First of all, she's not going to have a cot death just through being in a separate room. It's quite possible that she couldn't settle partly because you couldn't relax.

Is she really outgrowing the pram already? My ds2 is very big, but even he was still able to nap in the carrycot until 6m. They don't move about much at this age, and don't need much space - not like we adults needing more than a few inches at head and foot ends.

There is no rush yet to get her into the cot, nor does she have to have all her naps in the same place. If you think she needs to get used to her cot, you could put the moses basket or carrycot inside her cot for naps for a week or so, before putting her down in the cot itself.

She will be all right, you will see .

she is still young to be going up at "bed time" (7pm ish I'm guessing?).

Do you have a little chair that she sits in during the day? All of ours have slept in that during the day and also in the evenings - when they fell alsepp in that earlier we started thiking about outting them to bed.

DS3 is 9 months now and it's only been in te last 3 months that he has been going to bed in his cot at 7pm

sorry about all the typos!

please keep her in your own room your baby is twice as likely to die from cot death if they are put in their own room before 6 months and posters who give advice contarary to this need to think very carefully about this
you are right that there has been evidence to show that babies who die of cot death in the day were on their own so the advice is to keep them in the same room as you during the day as well. This is quite difficult to do so what I do is pram sleep my lo in the hall during the day mostly but sometimes in his cot if I am upstairs doing stuff. My lo is also on 91st and he still fits in the pram he is almost 5 months

Will she nap on your lap, next to you on the sofa, on a cushion etc etc? My DD slept in the main part of the house for ages during the day. Occasionally still does. I think we started putting her upstairs in the evening at about the four month mark because she was getting increasingly disturbed by us. I wouldn't worry too much about routines at this age, you can go through the motions of bath feed etc etc and then put her to sleep where you're happy.

Have you got a soft mat? - changing mat with blanket on the top would do - then she could sleep on the floor.

My 5mo sleeps on the sofa during the day, head nestled in a v-shaped cushion, not that she shows any inclination to roll. I prefer keeping her downstairs during the day for the cot death reasons cited by previous posters. I might let her nap upstairs once she gets to 6 months though.

On the other hand she has been put upstairs at 8pm then 7pm from about 8 weeks because she made it very clear that we were annoying her in the evenings and she wanted some peace and a big sleep.

Sympathies on the growing out of the pram/moses basket. My DD has sailed past the 99.6th percentile and had to leave the moses basket behind at 6 weeks. If you;re worried about the safety of the sofa, could you try one of those flat bean bag thingies downstairs?

Thanks everyone.
My instinct tells me to keep her with me 24/7 where possible, so I will endeavour to find a sleeping arrangement downstairs for the daytime once she grows out of her pram.
I'm not at all bothered about the lack of routine till she is much older, but DH is a little more pro-routine! The fact is that she is breastfed on demand and has fallen into a pretty predictible pattern all alone, and sleeps for longish periods at night now too.

well done, sounds like you're doing just fine

I know someone who used a travel cot downstairs during the day and then later on it became a playpen for when the mum needed to do something that could have been dangerous for the LO. If you have the room it might be a compromise.

My DD is long as well. She sleeps in a cot in our room at night and goes there after her bath and milk at 7pm. We have the baby monitor on and do check on her.
During the day she still fits in her Moses basket so sleeps there or in her cot upstairs, Mothercare have a nice Spot Beanbag for babies that you could use dowstairs - or a travel cot.

As DD struggled with sleeping at night I was actually advised to keep DD's day time naps downstairs, where there was light and some level of noise around her - so she knew how to distinguish between day and night more.

DD would sleep in her reclining chair during the day - it laid down flat. When she was too big for that she slept on her play mat, on the floor or our big floor beanbag. We tried a travel cot but she hated it and wouldn't sleep at all in it.

In the evenings we had her in the living room with us until after her later evening feed at about 10ish. Then she went to bed in her cot, which was in our room. We weren't long in following.