'EXTENDED' non-sleepers. Join me for some moral support.

[popsycal]

I have given up.
Ds2 is 2 years 8 months and has never Slept Through. He has rarely slept more than 3 consecutive hours. A normal night - he will wake around 5 times, be in our bed around 2ish and be an absolute menace throughout.

It is not just is, is it?

Wow, that's tough.
I keep being made to feel bad because my 10 month old likes a bit of a drink in the night. I hope the Health Worker Bods don't give you such a hard time.
Does he want milk each time, or just a cuddle?

He wants in the snuggly bed for cuddles....

We have had invesigations/overnight sleepclinic stuff to no avail. I have developed a chronic medical condition at least in part due to this.

I know there are more Non-Sleeping Mums ofToddlers here. Butcan'trememver who

the sleep clinic thing didn't help then?

poor you.

ds2 has never slept through either, but he's only 14 months, so not the same thing at all really. is he knackered in the day too?

x-posted.

I assume you've tried giving him all the kinds of comforters there are then?

or, you could get yourself a spiky set of pyjamas so cuddling wasn't such a nice option? I think there's a gap in the market. we could go on dragon's den and everything.

We have the added complicationof ds1 (5) being an early riser. before 5am for the last frotnight.
ds2 has beenill recently. Better now.BUt doestr sleepin theday. but he was so fed up of early waking thAT he fell asleep in the caron the way homefromthe school run today at 9:15 anf i couldnt wake him til11:30.
this is the oy who rarely sleepsin the day

sorry fo crap typing. bizaarre replacementworklaptop

x posts here too"
spiky pyjamas soudn good.though i amsure he would develop one of his bizarre likings for them,

i was putting himto bed tongiht and in desperatin i said he could havea milky way if he stayed in his ow roomall night.

he said,
no mummy-mecuddleyou MORE than milky way
and[sad}

oh what a sweety. you know my older two would probably agree to my leaving for a week if there was a milky way in it for them.

at spiky PJs/dragons den!

My DS is 3.3, slept through the night like an angel when very young (was very low on 02, so always floppy and sleepy) but now is a complete scamp!

He goes off at 7.30, some nights he is awake again by 8.30 for up to 3 hrs. He used to be awake every night from 2-4. His condition causes the sleep problems and his learning difficulties mean it is hard for him to understand - so different reasons to you, but the same long term sleep deprivation for us both.

Melatonin doesn't work for him, too higher dose can cause diturbed sleep/nightmares and I give him half a 3mg tablet, he goes off brilliantly but still wakes regularly. Community Paed told us to sedate him every 4th night so whole family could get a nights sleep - even that has worn off now.

It has got so bad that my DH sleeps in the spare room every night as he has to leave for work at 6am and it disturbs him if I'm getting up and down all night.

Yours sleepily.....

Poor you Popsy, you're hard core. What did they say at the sleep clinic?

Maybe he likes the feeling of being really snuggled in - perhaps you could work out some way to make him snuggled in tight in his own bed. We used to get away with moving him into his own bed once he was well asleep so that at least he was used to waking in his own bed - maybe that would save him waking when Dad gets up too.

I wish I could offer a crumb of comfort, but mine's 5.5 yo now and she still can't/won't sleep through every night - she was awake at 0045hrs and came into us at 0430. She does it just often enough that we aren't on the verge of nervous breakdowns, but it isn't easy at all. Fortunately (or not, I'm not sure) she gets a lot of it from me, as I don't sleep well either, so I'm often awake anyway. She invariably wants a cuddle and, though I tell her that isn't really a good reason to keep us awake, I don't really think that it's fair to expect a 5 yo to just get on with it. Sleep deprivation might be making me confused though - what do others think?

Everhopeful, I think you sound lovely. If you're happy to cope with it then I don't think it's a problem. Popsy sounds like she's got a live wire though and is suffering. Popsy, I'm sure i've asked you this before but does he sleep when he gets into bed with you?

just signing in so you don't feel alone. DS (20 mnths), never slept through, generally sleeps 2-3 hour stretches, 4-5 if we are amazingly lucky. Tried cc, outright failure. Tried other methods, nothing, nada, zilch. Night weaned, no change. Feed nice stodgy supper, no change. Remove milk and wheat from diet, no change. We count ourselves very lucky if he sleeps through the evening and we get some grown up time. Used to be on the sleep boards as Bikebug, but stopped as concentrating on the problem was not helping me to cope!

Greengoblin - sounds the same as ds2.

we end up co-sleeping every night and he is dreadful. wakes constantly.but neither of us can summon the energy to get him back in his own bed
~

popsycal, yes, sounds very similar. DH or I tend to co-sleep with DS seperately in the spare room as there is no space in our bed. To be honest, mostly we cope, but I find it very, very hard sometimes, especially when I realise how different friends' experience is...

OMG popsy, you certainly are hardcore. My DD2 is 17 months and she has only slept through 4 times. She can wake 6 to 7 times a night although recently I have been having (yet another) attempt at not feeding her and it does seem to be helping.

I am knackered and I suspect slightly depressed due to the sleep depravation/frustration. Normally am happy normal sort of person but recently seem to be cracking up and becoming shouty impatient mother from hell. Doesn't help that DD1 is 4 going on 14 and is all back chat and obstination (sp) at the moment.

I take my wrath out on the cat so as not to do something I'd regret!!

Popsy, we've got DD her own double bed (well matress) and take it in turns to sleep with her in her room. Is that something you could consider? That way you get alternative nights off and it's a bit more manageable. If he's still waking when in bed with you it suggests to me it's not especially a comfort thing but why he wakes so frequently? Can you hazard any guesses?

Oh bless Popsy - I'm sorry that you are having such a hard time - sleep deprivaion is awful isn't it? My lo is crying at the moment but it's dh's turn to go up and sort her out.... Sje's now 11 months old and has never slept through. I like you have tried everything to try and get her to sleep...nothing has worked. I've now come to terms with the fact that if you have a poor sleeper it's because they are poor sleepers. It's nothing we have done and nothing we will do will make a difference. It will pass but until then we just have to go into survival techniques.

I started ignoring all the advice and things have improved to about 4 wakings a night - although 3 teeth emerging at once plus a chest infection/cold has raised that significantly!!!!! More like 7 to 9 at the mo!! I now co-sleep, breast feed or rock/pat to sleep. I'm much happier and rested. However, she still starts her day from 5.30 onwards..... and never naps for more than 30mins. I have acted on advice to try and improve things but it only has ever seem to make things worse.

I did try cc once as I was desperate (when she was waking hourly) but she cried for 2 1/2 hours which wasn't healthy for me or her, I won't go down that road again. I'm a really mellow person usually - but this sleep thing has really tested me.

Howver, it will pass, my dh and I can't wait until she's 15 and we will have the pleasure of running into her bedroom at 5.15 one morning and waking her up!!!!!!! hen I hear of mums complaining that their 3 min old baby won;t drop their 10pm feed, yak, yak yak. I want to sob in depair. My friends brand new 3 day old baby is sleeping better than my 11 month old...

Popsycal - I also just wanted to say that he's a poor sleeper because he's so intelligent - I'm sure I read that it's a link somewhere... When he's a gorgeous young man with 4 A* A levels and off to Oxford to study Law/medicine/architecture - it'll all be worth it!!!!!!

I can hear him stirrng now
it is driving me mad

I'll join you for moral support! Poor you. My ds is only 5 months but is also up every hour, sometimes every 20 mins. I have also tried cluster feeds/dreamfeeds / weaning/co-sleeping/rocking etc. etc. He still keeps waking. Which is why I'm on here in desperation at 2:30am!

Popsycal - this non sleeping won't be helping your Fibromyalgia either. poor you

Hi there.

My son didn't start sleeping through until some time after his second birthday, so ok, I'm not in 'the club' anymore (he is sleeping quite well at the moment, she says tentatively for fear of jinxing it!), but I completely relate with the sheer hell of extended sleep deprivation and the horror of hearing about 3 month olds that sleep 12 hours a night! . Interestingly, I have two friends who have 'bad sleepers' - a 3 yr old who wakes several times a night and a 3 yr old who will only sleep with her mum...which leads me to believe that it is much more common (and infact, 'normal') than we are led to believe by all these bloody parenting guides.

saltire - I ampretty sure that the nonsleeping thingis the cause of my fibromyalgia