At the end of my tether

[tacolove]

22 month old WILL NOT GO TO SLEEP.

He used to self settle but won't anymore, cries all night hysterically until we go to him and then lots of sighs, shouting, tears later (usually 2 hours) he will go to sleep if lying next to us.

We've recently tried him in a toddler bed but it's exactly the same.

Tonight we've put him to bed at 6pm as he had a very early nap and is exhausted but still no luck 1.5 hours later.

I'm pregnant and desperately need him in a good bedtime routine before baby is here. I really am at the end of my tether, I'm tired, I'm fed up and I'm worried because nursery are picking up his lack of sleep. He looks exhausted . When I say we've tried everything I mean literally. I've paid hundreds in blackout blinds, night lights, mattresses, bedding, comforters. Tonight I even gave him a little calpol. NOTHING WILL MAKE HIM GO TO SLEEP.

Would anyone recommend a sleep consultant maybe?

Thanks

I would keep him in a cot.

Also, offer him extra reassurance at bedtime ubtil he is asleep, not less. He sounds like he's feeling scared and insecure. If he's going through a phase if needing the security of you being close until he is asleep, do that. Then have a plan to slowly and gradually reduce his dependence on you.

Sounds like he’s right in the middle of a ‘leap’, having a quick look there seems to be one at 20/21/23 months so could be any or all.

I notice a marked difference in our DC when he’s due to go through one/is going through one. Some notice nothing at all which, I mean is great of course 😬😀 but others need extra reassurance.

Ignore the next bit if you already know: the leaps are when huge cognitive changes happen and they become unsure of their world again, like being a newborn and everything suddenly coming into focus. It’s petrifying for them and they just want you for comfort. Which is annoying for you because you just want sleep 😴 and you know your baby does too.

I don’t really have any decent advice other than when we go through it, I cuddle him/give him what he needs then once I notice him being less clingy/fussy I retreat a bit back to normal mode. We all get sleep that way.

@FTEngineerM thank you that really is helpful and sounds about right.

@FATEdestiny I can't because the baby will be going in the cot I want to transition him in plenty of time. Plus he is exactly the same in the cot so makes so difference.

Xx

We got a double bed and took turns sleeping with the toddler in it. Not ideal because we haven’t slept together for the past two years. But at least we’re not hallucinating and passing out due to lack of sleep.

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