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Am so p****ed off, needing some reassurance that this will get better!!!!!

6 replies

pevie · 12/11/2007 19:56

Sorry here I go having a moan again. Was on last week about trying sleep training with my 6 and a half month old and some of you were kind enough to share your thoughts. As it happens was doing softly, softly approach, picking her up as needed to be reassured that she wasnt in pain, etc. Was also feeding her once or twice a night so knew it might not kick in very easily. However, other night she screamed blue murder after having being picked up a few times and so I caved and brought her into bed. Bizarelly the night after that she only woke once, bliss. But has now gone back last few nights to waking more and more and not letting me put her back down at all so that I ended up propped up on pillows trying to sleep at about 5 this morning!!!! This has now been going on for last 4 or 5 months (first few months were okay). We dont know if shes sore (she is on medication for reflux and is better in day) or has wind or sore tummy or what or is just bloody pissed that we dare to put her down sometimes. Please share any experiences of these very unsettled babies who eventually settled as need to feel there is hope!!! Am due back to work in January and I am so worried about it as dont know how we'll cope if its still the same. Also DD1 suffering from having very grumpy, pissed off parents. Please help!!!!

OP posts:
whomovedmychocolate · 12/11/2007 20:05

Oh dear. I feel for you - DD is just over one and has never slept through. You do get through it and you adapt so you are less, well psychotic, by the time they are a year old.

They do get better when they get to nine months, normally. So that's just about ten weeks to go.

Are you sure she's not teething though?

gingerninja · 12/11/2007 20:12

Pevie it does get better I can assure you. You've got a couple of choices I guess. Sleep training or managing the impact on you and your family. We chose the latter approach and co-sleep (these days taking it in turns in DD's room, she has a double matress on the floor at 14 months I ask you Anyway, even with doing nothing it's a million times better than at 6 months. Co-sleeping successfully takes some getting used to but once you've mastered it and more importantly, accepted it. It works a dream. I found the more I fought it the worse it got and the more cheesed off with each other we got. After I just accpeted that this is the way it is we all got more sleep oddly.

Good luck

pevie · 12/11/2007 20:50

I guess thats what I really struggle with - managing the impact on my family - it feels like a huge price to pay, especially when we didnt have these problems with DD1 (well not to the same extent anyway) We do a little cosleeping but its difficult as I have very weak bladder and am constantly up and down to the toilet. Also it doesnt seem fair to DD1 who never really did this. She asks sometimes but she doesnt sleep very well in our bed!!! Maybe we do have to take the pressure off ourselves for it to get better quickly and go with flow a bit with view to trying sleep training when shes more settled!!

OP posts:
gingerninja · 13/11/2007 13:13

Yeah, it must be awful if your first was a sleeper. Lulls you into a false sense of security. I deserve a sleeper with my second! Don't know what to suggest really. I don't know much about CC as never really wanted to do it but I've tried all those other more gentle methods and they didn't really do anything other than make me obsess about how little sleep I was getting. Age certainly plays a part and things do get better naturally. I don't know much about reflux but is she more settled when upright? If that's the case maybe that's why she is happier during the day. Can you prop her cot at an angle or anything?

I don't know if there is anyway you could reason with DD1 suggest weekend mornings you all snuggle up together for half an hour before you get up or something. Or even read books at night in your bed, just you two. Maybe that would take the pressure off. I'm still looking for the miracle sleep inducing solution though

FluffyGiraffe · 15/11/2007 20:43

Letting DD1 in for a snuggle at weekends sounds a great idea. Can't think of anything nicer than just dozing back off to sleep for an hour or two snuggled in with Mum & Dad.
My little one slept in our bed most of the time for the first 6 months and he then decided himself that he was OK on his own - didn't actually take any help from us. Most of the things I've worried over, he's just got on with OK when the time was right for him.
Hope all goes well.

DaddyJ · 15/11/2007 20:52

hey pevie, sorry to hear things have not improved

Given that the sleep consultant's training
has failed why not give the softly-softly
co-sleeping approach a chance?

Out of interest, why did the sleep-training not work? What happened in the end?

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