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15 month suddenly screaming for hours at bed time and through night

1 reply

Jks27 · 19/04/2021 21:49

Hi, I’m wondering if anyone has any ideas or tips

My LB is 15 month and had generally been a pretty ok sleeper, we done sleep training controlled crying at 6 months, his bed time has always been around 6.15 and went to sleep fine with no fuss. But for the last two weeks(now going into week 3) he started waking through night screaming for hours, as soon as we go in his room he stops but as soon as we step foot out the door get starts screaming again, the only way we could get him to sleep is by staying in his room until he fell asleep, which we know was creating a rod for our own back but we had work in the morning so needed sleep, we tried a later bed time gradually, we tried night light, comforter, supper, nothing seemed to work. The last maybe 4 days he hasn’t been as bad waking through night but now he will not go down for bed, we decided to stay with 7.30 for bed time and it can take 2 hours of crying with us popping in every few minutes gradually increasing the time left before he will fall asleep. He is getting he canines through but surely they would bother him in the day too? And he has calpol and anbesol but makes no difference so it makes me think it’s not that?

OP posts:
FATEdestiny · 20/04/2021 20:26

If he is anxious when you leave, gradual withdrawal would be a much better option than controlled crying as you are doing now.

The basic premise is you always stay until he is asleep (Then seek out ninja style 10 mins after he falls asleep). But over time you have a plan towards gradually withdrawing how dependant he is on you being there. For example

● stay bent over his cot until asleep, always. After a few days/weeks once he's ok with that...
● Bend over the cot if he is unsettled.
Stand by the cot when calm.
Bend back down to him if upset, stand again when calm.
Stay until 10 mins after going to sleep.
After a few days/weeks once he's ok with that...
● Bend over the cot if he is unsettled.
Stand by the cot facing the door when calm.
Bend back down to him if upset, stand facing the door again when calm.
Stay until 10 mins after going to sleep.
After a few days/weeks once he's ok with that...
● Bend over the cot if he is unsettled.
Stand a step away from the cot facing the door when calm.
Bend back down to him if upset, stand away from cot again when calm.
Stay until 10 mins after going to sleep.
After a few days/weeks once he's ok with that...
● Bend over the cot if he is unsettled.
Stand by the door when calm.
Back to the cot if upset, but always withdraw again when calm.
Stay until 10 mins after going to sleep.
After a few days/weeks once he's ok with that...
● Bend over the cot if he is unsettled.
Stand outside the door when calm.
Back to the cot if upset, but always withdraw again when calm.
Stay until 10 mins after going to sleep.
After a few days/weeks once he's ok with that...
● Bend over the cot if he is unsettled.
Stand by the door for a few mins to make sure he stays calm. Then whisper you're just going to the loo, be right back. Don't be long, 2 or 3 mins then come back and whisper you came back do he trusts you.
Back to the cot if upset, as always. Wait by the door for the rest of the time until 10 mins after going to sleep.
After a few days/weeks once he's ok with that...
● make your "I'm just going to pop to... be right back" longer. Put washing away for example, anything upstairs. Keep your promise though, keep popping back so he knows you are there. Stay upstairs until 10 mins after going to sleep.
● work towards the promise you'll stay upstairs while he goes to sleep. Keep your promise.
● Finally work to the promise you'll always come if he shouts you (even if downstairs). He should now have developed more security when he's alone going to sleep though, by trusting you'll always come and be there if he needs you.

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