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Do I wait or do I go to her?

10 replies

110APiccadilly · 09/04/2021 11:15

DD is 4 months. She's generally a good sleeper (normal is one wake up, but we might get two, or sometimes she goes through).

She's been waking in the night and not crying. I can hear she's awake as she moves around and sometimes chats to herself and as she's in our room that does wake me. I normally end up picking her up and feeding her to get her back to sleep even though she's not upset, but should I?

For instance, last night she was awake from about 3, completely happy but awake - I fed her at about 3:30 and she was back asleep by about 4. I don't know if I should leave her longer and see if she settles herself (even though that would keep me awake!)

Any thoughts? I'd go to her if she was upset, but I have no idea what you're meant to do with a happy baby in the middle of the night!

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FortunesFave · 09/04/2021 11:42

No! You definitely shouldn't. At 4 months she can go all night without food.

I wouldn't anyway. I remember it was about this point that I put my DD1 into her own room because it was keeping me awake.

But I know many people aren't comfortable with that so young.

110APiccadilly · 09/04/2021 12:14

I'm not happy to move her into her own room yet (no judgement on those who did, I'm just a bit extra cautious as there has been a SIDS death in our extended family). I have moved her from right by my side of the bed to the other side of the room, but she still wakes me.

It's a shame I'm a light sleeper, she never wakes DH unless she cries.

I agree she can go all night without feeding, firstly because if she was hungry she'd cry, and secondly because sometimes she does sleep through. I'm more concerned about her getting into a habit of being awake for ages in the middle of the night. (And the fact I get woken - there may not be a solution to that one until she's 6 months when I won't be concerned about moving her to her own room.)

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FortunesFave · 09/04/2021 12:25

I don't see why she'd get into the habit of it. She's obviously just experiencing a natural blip in her sleep pattern if she's not crying.

Poppet12345 · 09/04/2021 15:43

Sounds like 4 month sleep regression. I'd try and leave her to resettle as constant feeding back to sleep will create a habit and as you said she's not hungry. It'll pass, try leaving her so she can learn to resettle

110APiccadilly · 09/04/2021 19:17

Ok, I'll stick my headphones in and try to get back to sleep if she wakes tonight as that seems to be the consensus! I guess eventually she'll either go back to sleep or cry - and I always go to her if she cries.

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Vicky1989x · 09/04/2021 19:23

I used to feed my DD every time she woke like that, then when she got to 6 months I realised she was waking out of habit not hunger so I just left her to it and she’d eventually go back to sleep.

110APiccadilly · 10/04/2021 04:05

And of course tonight she woke up crying, which she hasn't done in a while. That'll teach me. Oh well, will see what happens tomorrow.

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OnlyFoolsnMothers · 10/04/2021 04:32

At 4 months I’d offer a feed, if she wants it she will take it if she doesn’t she won’t.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 10/04/2021 04:33

At 4 months she can go all night without food not sure what 4 month olds you’ve encountered but babies this young do feed at night

ManicPixie · 10/04/2021 07:05

If she’s not crying count it as a blessing and leave her be. If she eventually goes back to sleep then she’s learning to self-sooth.

And no, 4 MOs don’t need a feed at night assuming they’ve had a good feed before bed - many only want one because they’re used it and know no different.

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