2 y/o sleep issues, suggestions please :)

[Mh16c]

Hi everyone,

Like most mums on these threads I am desperate for sleep. My son is 2, well just about to turn 2 in a couple of weeks and he has never slept through the night since he was born. The longest stint has been 3 hours as a record.
I am finding myself really struggling now, with nearly 2 years of continuously broken sleep I am starting to lose my patience wondering when this will ever end.
We paid for a sleep consultant which actually ended up making things worse for us. We’ve never done the cry it out but I’m starting to think this may be the only option. How would that even work with a 2 y/o though?!
His current bedtime and nap routine have been pretty stable we never really deviate. he’s also down to just his one nap a day. We’ve tried letting him sleep on his nap as long as he wants, capping the nap and even no nap which results in him sleep walking. I feel there may be some underlying issues as to why but no HV or doctor takes me seriously.
I am still breastfeeding him as this settles him quickly most nights, but I don’t give in to milk every time and he will settle for a cuddle, shh too etc. Some nights like last night we were up from 12-4, then he was so hard to get down for his nap today. He sleeps in his own room, in a double bed as some nights I end up in there with him through desperation. We could never get him in a cot from when he was born.
I just want to hear other mums stories who have been in a similar boat. Did you just leave it to ride out, how old were they before they’d finally just sleep. Or did anyone end up getting so desperate for sleep what worked for them?

Thank you :)

👋 hi

I know you said you couldn't get him in cot but have you tried recently?
Also - you say he's in a double bed - does he sleep in a sleeping bag or have a duvet?
I ask as my DD now 2.5 years - since newborn days has been in a sleeping bag with a blanket over of needs be. In warmer weather she has a lower tog. She won't sleep in anything else it's like she has to feel 'wrapped' up - although she's not really

I think if you don't want to sleep train (Which will be very distressing at this age) then you would be better embracing full time cosleeping for the longer term.

Your problem now seems to be you are half doing it, and that inconsistency is making matters harder and your toddler has no clear idea of expectations. Sometimes you breastfeed, sometimes you don't.

Sometimes you cosleep, sometimes you don't. This, precisely this, is the central key to your problem. Be consistent. Either teach independant sleep. Or practice attachment parenting (cosleeping and breastfeeding for comfort). You're being half-ass and by doing both, you are achieving nothing.