Can I learn to sleep better?

[Isawbumperkissingsantaclaus]

I have never been a good sleeper. I take a long time to get to sleep and once I am awake, usually that's it, I have to get up. I'm an 8+ hours a night girl, not good at napping during the day (makes me feel groggy and by the time I get to sleep it's time to wake up again).

I have a 4 month baby, she is a great little sleeper now, 9-6.30/7ish most nights. But I am still waking periodically in the night and yesterday was awake at 5am and couldn't get back to sleep. Since putting DD in her own room about 2 weeks ago I seem to have woken up just before she does, about 6.30ish. Today was the first time she had to shout for me to wake me up (7.50) and I was knackered when I got up to feed her. Now her and DH are napping in bed together but I can't sleep, despite being tired.

Also, DH sometimes snores. Normally this doesn't wake me (I don't think) but if I am awake in the night and he starts it I just want to smother him. I have bought him some nasal strips to save his shin in the night, but they are a bit hit and miss.

Once I am awake I start thinking about all the things I have to do and then have to get up. Often that is what stops me going to sleep at night too.

Basically, after that disjointed post, my point is I am a crap sleeper. Can I learn to be better? Can anyone recommend and books/treatment? I am horrible when I am tired and sick of looking like death warmed up and right now I feel like I could sleep for a week! Can anyone help?

Same as me. If you find any answers please let me know. That's why I found the first few months so hard because I'd be awake periodically myself then awoken frequently by DD and it takes me ages to get back to sleep if I've been woken. Also once awake in the morning, say after about 5 I cannot do the lay in, doze type thing. I have to be up doing stuff. It's a curse isn't it?and I've only got myself to blame for DD's poor sleep habits!!!

PS, meant to say that I've found it HAS got better since the early months. It used to feel like electricity surging through my body if I woke in the early months but these days it's much less dramatic. I don't think you sleep very deeply in the first few months of motherhood. Do you think it might help if you DD was in your room? Maybe you're anxious and keeping her closer would help you relax.

We've only just put her in her own room, because I think when I was stirring she was too, and having to listen to both her and DH snore was driving me mad. I did suggest DH and DD sleep together and I have my own room - but he wasn't top keen on that .

It is getting better, today for the first time in ages I was sound asleep when DD woke up and could have slept on but had to feed her. DH offers to feed her sometimes, but guaranteed on that morning I will wake up before he does and toss and turn while he goes and feeds her and I think "well that was a waste of EBM"! When he is off they both then have a nap together but I can't sleep once I am awake.

Thanks for the advice - hope we both get some tips!

I don't know how to word this without it coming across as being critical so I want to start by saying it's not.

What you say is interesting because the whole debate about keeping them in your room for the first six months to protect against SIDS is for exactly that reason. Because, by nature, we sleep lighter after having a baby and our babies are roused from deep sleep by shifts in parental sleep patterns. So, it is very natural and healthy for you both to be disturbing one another certainly in the first few months. I know this is probably no help when you feel terrible on no sleep hence trying to rest as much as possible when you can. This stage will pass very quickly.

Don't worry about being critical, I know what you mean and appreciate what you are saying. we did have reservations but she is nearly 5 months and decided that the odds are of me doing more damage through lack of sleep, for example driving without strapping her into her car seat

Any advice for the sonumbalistically challenged?

I have had this problem too. Once I was awake i couldn't re-settle. I moved m DD out of the room and the first week was good, her sleeping improved. Then she got a cold and I dont know what happened but I became very anxious and couldn't get back to sleep from then on. My DH also snores, I tryed earplugs which i found helped.
I looked on youtube for relaxation techniques. I found deep breathing helped me.5 deep breaths in from the stomach and 8 breaths out. Self tapping also helped before going to bed with a hot milky horlicks, hot bath...glass of red wine good before bed.
Hypnotherapy is a powerfull treatment. You can be hypnotised so you can tend to your baby if she wakes in the night and then re settle yourself like switching a light off.
Relaxation through the day is the key and to remain relaxed before bedtime.
good luck, it is a common problem and your not the only one out there.