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HELP losing my mind :(

7 replies

AmieB · 11/03/2021 08:31

So up until a few weeks ago our 4 month old was sleeping 7pm - 3am, having a quick feed then sleeping until 7am. He would have I'd say 4 naps a day totalling about 4.5hrs and this was perfect! All of a sudden he's taken a u-turn and is now just horrible. Most nights he sleeps fine 7pm - 3am, has his feed but then refuses to go back to sleep, I spend until about 5am trying to resettle him when I eventually give up and bring him into our bed. Other nights he will go back to sleep but wake every hour so 4am 5am 6am 7am. Daytime naps have also gone to pot, usually because he will be up at 5am so by 7am is screaming the house down wanting a nap then throwing the rest of the day out of sync. Not only that but he is waking our 2 year old so she is now up at 5/6am when she used to sleep until sometimes 8am, so I feel awful for her as she is so knackered all day long. Losing my mind here and really struggling. I don't care if he doesn't sleep through the night but the awful nights, stupidly early mornings, stressful erratic daytime naps and an unhappy tired baby + toddler are bringing me down, constantly finding myself in tears just feeling like everything is crumbling around me, I'm totally losing control of it all. Can anyone help try and get my baby back on track? I'm struggling with what to do if he wakes at 5 and by 630/7 wants a nap as some say hold out until 830/9 - well this is insane he would make himself sick with exhaustion. He does self settle but has a dummy so when he won't resettle after his night time feed I tend to make sure he's got his dummy, white noise playing and I pat ssh then sit on his bedroom floor. I repeat this until I'm confident he's asleep.
Sorry for the long post, trying to make sure I've explained everything in the hope someone can help me :(

OP posts:
eve80 · 11/03/2021 08:37

It's sleep regression...will be better soon

AmieB · 11/03/2021 08:52

I did think this but I'm just at my wits end on how to help him, do i just muddle through this hell until it's over or is there something I can do? Feel like I can't carry on like this :(

OP posts:
AmieB · 11/03/2021 08:56

Sometimes I also find he's desperate for a nap at about 5/5:30pm but he goes to bed at 7pm (has done consistently since a few weeks old) so I struggle with either letting him nap and putting him to bed later, or keeping him up until his bedtime but then he's just so difficult to get to sleep and is awful all night long x

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ChocFondant · 11/03/2021 09:53

Hi,

Feel your pain! My 5 month old has been doing all sorts in terms of sleep in the last few weeks and I'm totally exhausted. Well done you for getting on as best as you can with a toddler too! It must be so hard.

I had a thought with your 5/5:30 nap. Dd has an 8pm bedtime and also sometimes wants a nap at 6. I let her have 45 mins then if she's not awake (she often is at the moment) I wake her for a feed/ bath/ bedtime routine and even though that awake window is short if it's not too short she'll go back down. Would a cat nap at 5 still enable bedtime? It's just a thought and I'm definitely making it up as I go with dd!

ChocFondant · 11/03/2021 09:54

I just saw a 4 month sleep regression support post in this section as well. In case it helps to know you're not alone!

SassyPants87 · 11/03/2021 09:57

@AmieB sounds like sleep regression my baby went through this for a few weeks but is much better now! I mainly had to ride it out but also I didn't realise she was ready for more development advances. E.g she would really fight her naps and scream her head off when o tried putting her down. So I just started to put her down when I knew she was tired and she would drift off herself. This never used to happen mind you! So not sure why I thought I'd give it a go again but she was ready to do it and when she woke in the middle of the night she was able to put herself back to sleep. Also around this time is when I really started to establish day time routine. 3 naps all around the same time and if she just wouldn't sleep I would just take her out in the pram and let her have her nap in there. I quickly figured out the day time naps affected the night time sleep!

I hope you crack it soon x

AmieB · 11/03/2021 10:45

Thanks so much guys, feel tearful just reading your lovely replies.
@ChocFondant yes i think I might try this as I've found he usually wakes from his 3rd nap at 4pm after I've done the nursery run so by 6pm when we start bedtime I'm tearing my hair out and he's just inconsolable. Thank you - will give this a go tonight!
It's hard as with our daughter there was nobody for her to wake so if we needed to leave her to cry for a few minutes it was no bother and she quickly learnt to self settle and sleep better. This time around I'm so scared of him waking our daughter that I probably go to him too quickly but I definitely can't let him cry like I did before. Just such a shame as I feel like it's spoiling things, I'm really not enjoying it at the moment and dread the days/nights at the moment :(

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