5 month old stopped sleeping

[magda3]

My baby, currently 5.5 month old was a fairly good sleeper at 3 months (sleeping in her cot for up to 6h at a time). When 4 month sleep regression hit she basically returned to newborn stage and started waking up every 2-3h. At 4.5 months we moved her to her own bedroom which initially improved her sleep but after a good week or so she started waking more and more and at the moment needs me so frequently that I ended up sleeping with her through the night, otherwise I get no sleep at all. I wouldn’t even mind that if it wasn’t for the fact that the sleep quality I get is quite bad as she’s obviously a little baby so she’s making noises and is fidgeting especially energetically in early morning.

Any advice on how to get out of this?
My husband insists we should try some version of CIO but my eyes tear up even thinking about it...

Just to add, she’s very jolly and happy otherwise, almost never cries. A couple of times on suspicion of teething pain I gave her calpol and it didn’t do anything to her sleep...

Help!

No advice but in exactly the same situation! My son was a terrible sleeper as a newborn, then improved so much and was sleeping for 6/7 hours in his cot, it was bliss. The 4 month regression hit 6 weeks ago and no sign of things improving. I'm also bedsharing after the first wake up but often I barely get anymore sleep doing that as he is feeding and thrashing around. If he would sleep deeply with me I would just sidecar the cot and accept he needs to be close! I am at my wits end with it. I won't do CIO, I can't bear the idea that I'm training him not to cry because nobody comes, at the moment I'm trying the possums approach of extending his wake windows to build sleep pressure, we've had some nights where he's done 3/4 hours before first wake up which was a big improvement, but the last few nights have been awful. I would be willing to try gradual retreat with him when he's a bit bigger, I know some people say there is no such thing as gentle sleep training and it's all awful but the sleep deprivation is really affecting my mental health which isn't good for him either! I can't imagine it actually working for him though, at the moment I feel I'll never sleep well again!

Thank you for your message, it’s good to know I’m not alone in the same struggle!
I just spoke to a friend, mother of three and all she said was: “babies come in sleeping and non sleeping varieties”

Hope you get some sleep soon!

Sounds really difficult! How are you currently getting her to sleep when she wakes in the night? And how is her daytime sleep?

I start the night off by stroking her head but the third time I get up I just get in with her for the rest of the night and nurse to sleep every time she wakes up.
Daytime is fine, she’s got 3 fairly short naps of about an hour, at least one of those is in the pram during our walk.

I think you've probably got a couple of options depending on what you personally want to do! 1) commit to safely cosleeping 2) do some very gentle sleep coaching to reduce how much intervention you have on getting her to sleep. You know she can fall asleep with you stroking her head so I would try doing that gradually less and less until she falls asleep with you resting your hand on her head. And then keep removing your input like that until she is falling asleep lying next to you, then with you sat by the cot etc. It's a lot slower than CIO but gentler in the long run.

Yes, thank you. I sort of thought of a similar plan over the course of the day (I mean option 2). I wouldn’t mind cosleeping if she was giving me a good night sleep but unfortunately she’s too wriggly of a baby to allow me to get good rest and when I’m tired I’m not a very good human unfortunately

Yeah I couldn't cosleep with my son either, I don't believe he would actually sleep - would just bounce all over me all night worth a try with option 2 to see if you can wean her off needing you as much. Good luck!