Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Sleep

Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler. Need more advice on your childs development? Sign up to our Ages and Stages newsletter here.

Flip

Original poster

Recommendations for night waking 8 months

13 replies

Emmyjd30 · 03/02/2021 08:15

I know im just another mum on here with a baby who doesn't sleep but I feel like I'm running out of things to try so thought I might get some more ideas. My little boy is 8 months, has never slept through the night and we've only had about 2 nights where he's woken twice. Hes awake anywhere from 4-7 times a night generally. Occasionally we get a good night and its 3. I'm really starting to struggle as also have a 4yo is full on and am setting up a new online business and am just absolutely fried.

Hes very placid in general (nothing like my daughter) and falls alseep quickly and peacefully at bedtime unaided - thank goodness. He wakes at completely random times during the night and cries. We tried for awhile hubby going in and cuddling him and it worked great for a week (I still fed him 1-2 times during the night). After that week he then just cried until I went and fed him. Now we're back to me feeding him 4-7 times a night (but he doesn't fall asleep feeding). I just have no idea how to improve the situation, I don't need him to sleep through but even just one 4hr stretch of sleep I feel would save my sanity...

I should maybe add that he doesn't really eat much at all food wise, we offer stuff every day but he's not bothered, and he also seems to not like breastfeeding (a really strange one), and is very difficult to feed in the day apart from before naps. I'm not sure if it's to do with his tongue tie or what. They decided nothing needed to be done as he was gaining weight fine but feeding was awful for weeks and he's never fed longer than about 5-10 mins (which apparently is also normal).

Does anyone have any words of wisdom or ideas for me? Im so desperate for just a bit of sleep, especially with lockdown its all getting a bit much :-(

OP posts:

Thatwentbadly · 03/02/2021 08:19

What so you mean he doesn’t like to breast feeding? What’s happening during the day? My first was ff and like this, she had undiagnosed CMPA.

There is a big sleep regression from 8/9 months and lots going on developmental.

Waking 4 plus times a night is normal for a bf baby and I would expect a ff baby to be feeding 2/3 times a night at this age.

Have you tried cosleeping?

Original poster

Emmyjd30 · 03/02/2021 08:50

Well its almost like he's just SO distracted he doesn't want to feed. Then he gives in, sucks for a few seconds and pulls off to look around. But its quite extreme...and it's all day. Even at nap times I feel like I'm fighting with him to take his fingers out of his mouth to feed him, but once he starts he won't be too bad. But feeding has never been a great or peaceful experience. It was a BIG struggle the first 6 weeks or so and after that he was still clicking, fussing, gassy etc. It has improved since then but he's always been a bit of a panic feeder, like chug chug gulp as fast as you can to be done kind of style!

Other than a bit of eczema and lots of reflux when he was smaller he doesn't show any other symptoms of CMPA and both have improved massively recently.

I don't expect him to sleep through and don't mind feeding him once or twice but I just feel like being up all night STILL is wearing me down to the point where all of my get up and go has got up and gone.. Co-sleeping never really worked for us as I just never was able to sleep with him next to me.

OP posts:

ShirleyPhallus · 03/02/2021 08:56

He is basically using you as a human dummy and so can’t get back to sleep without a feed. He’s probably taking in more calories than you think during the night which is why he isn’t so hungry during the day.

Look in to sleep training, you need to get him sleeping on his own without needing to be fed to sleep. Lots of gentle methods out there or bit tougher is controlled crying which I did in exactly your situation and DD was night weaned and sleeping through from about night 4. I still have a dream feed for a while but have dropped that now too.

Disagree with PP who says an 8 month FF baby needs to be fed 2/3 times a night also. By this age they’re perfectly able to go for much longer stretches without being fed

Original poster

Emmyjd30 · 03/02/2021 09:02

Well it's a bit of a shocker as my daughter was a great sleeper, slept 8hrs at 6 weeks old... clearly it wasn't my parenting skills 😂😂

I think we'll try again for a bit having hubby go in, I kind of think he may go back to sleep after a few cries and cuddles etc its just not ideal having him cry for long as he wakes my daughter up. We initially tried that as I thought he needed to feed less at night and more in the day, that week where it was better and he only had 1-2 night feeds didn't change his daytime feeds at all..he must be getting enough as he's huge but its like someone is sneaking him in a Mcdoh in the nights or something!!

OP posts:

NeurologicallySpeaking · 03/02/2021 09:37

FF babies definitely don't feed through the night at this age. My FF baby stopped night feeds months ago (coming up to 8 months). However she still wakes up in the night and needs resettling- since the 4 month sleep regression. Sometimes she just wakes up at 4am ready to play 😬

Thatwentbadly · 03/02/2021 10:36

Was he assessed for tongue tie by a lactation consultant? With DD2 I had to sit in a quiet room to feed at that age but with lockdown I doubt you are going any where with many distractions. Does he have any sign of thrush or teething? These can make feeding painful

Thatwentbadly · 03/02/2021 10:38

@ShirleyPhallus

Disagree with PP who says an 8 month FF baby needs to be fed 2/3 times a night also. By this age they’re perfectly able to go for much longer stretches without being fed

Just because your baby does something does not mean it’s the norm. Durham Uni have done a lot of research into what is normal for baby sleep and they have made it available in a very easy to read format if anyone wants to take a look.

Original poster

Emmyjd30 · 03/02/2021 11:19

Yes he was assessed by several midwives, a health visitor specialising in bf, the feeding consultant at the hospital and a tongue tie specialist. They said it was the cause of the clicking, coming off a lot and swallowing lots of air but they didn't feel it was bad enough to do anything about.

I have tried taking him upstairs in a dark ish room to feed in the day and he's still more interested in looking around the room 😖 downstairs with the dog and my daughter etc there's just no chance! Its so alien to me as I fed my daughter for 3yrs and she was always a good feeder (and sleeper) but it just feels like such a struggle this time. I definitely don't feel the same about feeding this time but don't want to stop, especially this soon as it was such a mission getting this far and I know it is better for him. Just very frustrating.

Think I'll send hubby in again for a few nights, last time we made a plan that I'd feed him anytime before midnight or after 5am but in between hubby was going in. It was heavenly the few times it worked as I got a stretch of sleep.

OP posts:

Thatwentbadly · 03/02/2021 11:20

I would consider getting him seen by a private lactation consultant to re assess the tongue tie - it maybe causing him to slip off rather than him pulling away.

TheRev · 03/02/2021 20:09

Please please please book in to see a private lactation consultant. I know a really good one in Wiltshire if you happen to be near.
In the UK midwives, HV and even HV Lactation Consultants aren't trained to diagnose tongue tie sadly.

Mrsstarinthesky · 04/02/2021 07:58

I'm having a similar thing, DS is 7 months old. However he's eating alot of solids in the day. Is up 4-5 times a night for a feed. I might be able to settle him once without it but that's it. I feel your pain, the lack of sleep is real!
It's strange as last week he also only woke 2-3 times and it's just got worse again. Wondering if teething related and living in hope it will pass.
Joining the thread in the hope for some advice too!

FiloPastryMaker · 04/02/2021 13:54

Hi OP, 8 month old here who I think is pretty similar. He gets super distracted feeding during the day, pulling off and looking around, trying to stick his hands in his mouth at the same time as feeding (ouch) and needing a feed about 3 times a night but no pattern to this.

How often is he having the bf during the day? I found that I was offering too much and he feeds better now that I'm only offering 3 times during the day. Getting a bit of a routine with solids and bf has helped slightly. But I think the night time is disrupted as he seems to be developing so much at the moment and never-ending teething.

Mrsstarinthesky · 10/02/2021 07:53

@Emmyjd30 we have had improvement this past week. We've tried to ditch the dummy ( granted have given in a couple of times) with a bit of sleep training, leaving for 6 minutes then going in to comfort. If it goes past the shouting stage to crying we stop, which it rarely does. We have an ollie the owl white noise which we have turned on the cry sensor. He does stir in the night and the cry sensor comes on and he goes been to sleep with the white noise.
It has transformed our nights this week!
Still have had to wake up twice for feeds but twice between 7-6/7 feels like bliss compared to the usual 2hrs we were doing before. I had read that the 2hrs at this age are sleep cycles so the waking every 2hrs is a comfort thing to get back to sleep via being fed. So if they learn to self settle more then they don't wake as often. Good luck!

Flip