New baby due - terrace

[KinderWild]

Second baby due April. We live in a Victorian terrace. Walls a bit thin, in places it sounds like the neighbours are in the house with us!

Neighbours on both sides are pretty noisy and have disturbed my son's bedtime every night for 3 years either through their extremely loud arguing (neighbour a) or their children shouting/crying/ them shouting at their children (neighbour b). Neighbour b children are 9 and 12.

We have never complained about noise, see it as part and parcel of living in a terrace.

New baby due in April and will likely be in with us for at least a year as that's what I think is needed and spare bedroom that baby will go into is right at the other end of house. So thinking waking baby, crying and delay in me getting there will cause some disruption.

In our room the only real place for the crib to go is in the alcove bedside the chimney breast. But this wall is shared with our neighbours bedroom wall. I have looked at whether we can move the furniture around in our room to make another space for baby, but doing so wouldnt leave enough room for the crib (one side of room) and on the other side of the room, the baby would be directly next to a massive radiator and window. Not advised.

I am worried that our neighbours are going to be woken by the baby crying. As they will cry! I don't have the option to put furniture between the wall and the crib as a screen as it will use up the space for the baby! My husband thinks it's part and parcel of living in a terrace and it'll be fine but I remember when dc1 was tiny and neighbours banging on walls whether he cried (bedroom didn't back onto any shared walls) and the added stress this gave me.

Any thoughts?!

We are in the same boat. Mid terrace, Victorian house, 2nd baby due any day now. When DS was born his room was on the same wall as neighbours bathroom so was only a problem when he was really kicking up a fuss with teething or whatever. This time baby will be in with us for at least a year and like you the crib will be on their wall. They’ve only been in their since last June and are the noisiest people I’ve come across in my life, (I’ve posted about them on here before) have woken us or my DS on more occasions than I care to remember. I hate to say it but I don’t care. It’s a baby. They cry. What are you meant to do?

Why don't you look into soundproofing the shared wall? It shouldn't be that expensive if it's just a wall. There are some special plasterboard panels that are between 2 and 3cm thick. I'm considering this too for our flat but we have a problem that's two fold... neighbour next door and neighbour below 🙈. Anyway I'll probably go with the Soundproofing store as they seem to have good materials. Good luck

Honestly I think you're overthinking it. People have been having babies in terraces since you know, Victorian times. It's amazing how you can sleep through the sound of a child that's not yours!

Maybe I’m an arsehole neighbour but I don’t give two shits if next door hears the baby cry, life is noisy sometimes whether that’s builders, arguments or babies just move on.

As an aside: I hate my neighbour for other reasons that may skew my opinion.

I think it’s only a problem if you’re leaving your baby to cry for ages, which I’m sure you won’t be especially with them in the same room!

Quick cry which is then attended to - normal part of life in a terrace.

Please don't feel anxious and stop stressing yourself out.
It is a baby and everyone that's expecting complete silence from neighbors must be an utter a*hole.
You were so patient and understanding towards your neighbors and now it is their turn.
Honestly,enjoy your new arrival and if anyone complains,offer them some earplugs.

I think when you live in a terrace you accept that there will sometimes be noise. I never heard our neighbours newborn cry in the night. I do hear my new neighbours 4 year old running around (during the day thankfully).

Op I live in a terrace. Next door have 5 children and I've only ever heard the youngest.
He wakes every night at 1.47 am. Has done for 3 years.
Parents must be exhausted.'I hear him, roll over and go back asleep.

Thanks everyone. My DH thinks I am overthinking it also! TBH it is quite a relief that the majority of you agree! I did a little looking into sound proofing and don't think we could manage the extra DIY right now with work, home schooling, knackered third trimester and all the other baby prep.

I'm not going to leave baby to cry so will take your advice and see how things go.

Thanks all!

Your neighbours used to bang on the walls when your baby cries? Chris, that sounds like harassment and if it were possible I'd be trying to move elsewhere from such awful people. However I'm assuming it is not possible hence why you're still there.

Not about your baby crying but to minimise disturbance from your neighbours, have you tried background noise for your DC and/or yourselves. Either quiet lullabies or white noise? And ear plugs for yourself and/or DH? Can take turns so one person can hear the monitor/DC clearly and the other person won't be as disturbed by noise.

Ah I wasn't clear @MeadowHay, that was in a previous house. Neighbours were in their 20s and super intolerant of others noise but also super noisy

Thank you for the suggestions . Yes we have used lullabies for bedtime for a while and that has worked well. I should start that again. And that's a good shout about taking turns on the monitor. We'll have a chat about that. Could definately reduce some stress.