3 year old doesn't nap wakes 4.45am

[Cbd333]

Please help! DS hasn't napped for a few months but last few months on and off has woken up extremely early. Last few nights she has woken 4.30/45. She's been so tired and cranky during the day we've had to give her 30mjns sleep so we're locked in a vicious circle.

Last couple of mornings tried putting her back to bed (she gets up and stands at her door with has a child gate on) and told her we won't get her until 6am but she just cries and whines abs won't go back to sleep.

Any help would be so appreciated, I start back at work tomorrow following the death of my mum and I just can't go back so exhausted.

Firstly 💐 for your DM passing

Secondly, can you go to bed a bit earlier for a few nights to catch back up. Three year olds are stubborn creations are stubborn so anything you out in place is going to take a few days/nights to work

Is DS brewing any illnesses? Is there any noises or lights that are waking him up, is he getting hungry, thirsty, needs a wee, nappy is wet?

Depending upon what you think, some things to try are

An extra snack at bedtime, maybe weetabix with milk
Extra covers, maybe he is getting cold
Check that street lights arent shining in around his curtains
Just leave him, if he is whining it doesnt matter and after a few nights he will get bored and go back to bed or play with his toys
Try a groclock and sticker chart for not waking you up

We got a gro clock and put some books by DDs bed and said that she could look at the books but she wasn’t getting up until the sun comes up on her clock. I made quite a fuss about wow the suns up now you can get up, what a big girl etc and lots of praise. It took a week or so for her to understand that she definitely wasn’t getting up but after a while she did and now she often doesn’t wake up until later. I think it’s hard to get them to go back to sleep but I settled for her just doing something quietly.

What time does she go to bed?

4.30 is night time so I would never get a child up at that time. If my 3 year old wakes in the night I either put her back to bed or let her get into our bed, but no lights on or toys out.

I would ignore any whinging, and give rewards for staying in bed til 7.

Maybe music or an audiobook for her to listen to in bed?

I remember how hard this was with my DS2 at 3. Does nursery/pre school tire your little one out? I found my DS sleep patterns all over the place when he wasn't at pre school, but straight after pre school finished at midday I would encourage him to nap for an hour, I mean we never have managed a 7pm bedtime for our boys even now they're school age but usually they are tired enough to sleep at 8pm/8:30. DS2 is 5 now and he still falls asleep straight after school at 3:30 for a little nap

Thank you for your replies, I actually have a DD not a DS, clearly overtired 😂

She goes for bath at about 6.45pm after milk then has two stories and is usually asleep at 7.30pm. She goes to bed like a dream and very rarely wakes during the night.

We don't get her up at 4.30 but my husband tends to relent and gets up with her at about 5.45/6am.

I've previously bought a gro-clock but it freaks her out and she just refuses to have it in her room.

We lived with my mum and I did wonder whether the last 11 months (she was diagnosed with her leukaemia in February and died just after Christmas) have affected her but we have been so careful to maintain normality for her abs she otherwise seems fine.

She goes to nursery Monday, Tuesday, Friday and doesn't seem to be any more tired on those days.

I seem to have birthed Gazza - she just keeps
going 😩

Desperate bump before my inevitable wake up call in 6 hours! Thank you 🤞🏻

I always find if my LO is overtired we get an early morning wake up. I know you said she no longer naps but could a nap help her? Especially as you said she falls straight to sleep at night - sounds like she could be overtired? Perhaps a short cat nap? I always find it takes a good week or so of implementing a change to notice any changes so perhaps reinstate a nap for a week or so?

@SarahDay1990 When she has more then half an hour she wakes at around 4am 😩

Bizarrely this morning (her third birthday) she slept in until 6.30am. She was bombing around in the snow all day yesterday though so I wonder if she just needs to be exercised more!

@Cbd333 we are also in a similar situation!

My partners daughter is 2 1/2 and has started waking up between 4.30-5.00am, she will start shouting Daddy continuously until he goes in, we have tried ignoring her and she just carries on and gets louder. We have tried giving her some milk which does stop the shouting but then she starts up again when it is finished.

My 6 year old is in the room next door and it’s not fair on her to be woken at that time plus I am 32 weeks pregnant and not sleeping as it is.

Any advice on how to stop this shouting so early?

@pinklady1207 does she still nap during the day?

This is really easy to fix

She is waking up out of habit. Set your alarm for 15 mins before she is due to wake up and gentle disturb her - not enough to wake her up. She will go in to another sleep cycle. It takes three or four times to work. Sounds like a PITA but it really does work

Keep her up a bit later.

@Seasaltyhair wake up times have been all over the place last three days - 4.45am, 6.30am and then 5.45am this morning. Not sure when I would set my alarm for!?

This morning I put her back to bed and then firmly said it's nighttime, mummy and daddy will get you when it's morning, then reinforced that by saying the same thing down the baby monitor (she likes the monitor, knows we're always there!)

Cue screaming, heaving to try and make herself sick, saying she'd banged her head on the baby gate (I went to check and she hadn't) and 'I've done a wee in my nappy.' I then, perhaps Meanly, said, 'if you don't stop crying you won't have the rest of your birthday presents in the morning.' She then stopped immediately and just stayed quietly until we got her at 6.45.

She is mostly a really placid, sweet-natured child but the hours of 4.30ish to whenever she gets up is like a scene from the Exorcist. I think she is probably just manipulating us she we need to stay firm but by nature we're pushovers easy-going so finding that, and the sleep deprivation, really hard!