Sleep training

[LL1998]

Sleep training! (Just looking for some advice)
My 6 month old baby so good as gold sleeping though the night I got to be honest, he will have a bottle any time between 10pm - 12am but will then stay there until 4am (I just give him his dummy) then will wake up about 8am - 9am.
I just want some advice about getting him settled at bed time though. At the moment he wants to go to sleep about 7pm / 8pm but every time I put him in his cot he wakes up instantly. I have tried getting out of the routine of rocking him to sleep as I don’t want him to be reliant on this but he will not settle in his cot and if I let him fall asleep on my bed he will stay asleep once picked up and then wake straight up as soon as he’s put in his cot.
I know this is my own fault for cwtching him to sleep but just as my first baby I couldn’t help myself 🤭
I am not desperate as like I mentioned he does sleep a nice big chunk but I just was looking for some advice on maybe how to get a bit of a better routine when he first goes down (to self soothe)

Cuddle him and don't feel like you need to sleep train. They change and adapt as they get older. My DS is now 23 months and we sit beside him whilst he falls asleep.

Keep rocking him to sleep. They are only babies once. Sleep training is cruel.

They change all the f'ing time! Sleep traing tends not to stick apparently

I used to be able to pat DD to sleep, doesn't work anymore.

Rocking/jiggling in the pram stopped working again too but I think that would work again now but don't need it.

Carrier to sleep worked then didn't then did then she hated the carrier now she loves it again.

Boobing to sleep works more of the time, failing that I just bore her to sleep by falling asleep myself 😅

Transferring to her cot/bed had got harder because she's heavier but also her bed is cold and she feels it so I lie in it before moving her or put a hot water bottle in for a bit.

She's 2 and still wakes at least 3 times a night if not more (every 3 hours max usually, 4-5 is rare, 1-2 isn't uncommon) and she is normal AF. Wanting to be close to you is normal and waking in the night is normal, it's survival because evolution hasn't caught up with modern life yet.

Thank you guys. I feel like passing comments recently have made me feel like I need some sort of sleep training routine but knowing that just cuddling him to sleep every night and letting him know I am there works for other people and isn’t frowned upon has put me much more at ease 🙂

Thank you 🙂

Thanks for advice 🙂

Thank you for the advice 🙂

I do love a cuddle before bed as I think this won’t be forever and before I know it he’ll be moving out. Thank you

Babies are designed to be fed or cuddled to sleep. You’re doing a brilliant job and being what your baby needs! If he wakes as soon as you try and move him you could try lying with him for longer. Think how you sleep, if something disturbs you within 10 minutes of nodding off you’re more likely to take up than say 15 or 20 minutes. Have a play with your timings. It’s exhausting but better for you and him if he stays asleep once you move him and all your cuddling work pays off. When you move him, try and get his feet to touch the mattress before the rest of him. He might wake because he feels like he’s falling which would freak anyone out.

He’s so little, he won’t learn to self settle at 6 months. It sounds like he’s sleeping well. It’s completely normal for babies to stir and wake. Have a look up at biologically normal sleep and you’ll feel better. If you’re on Facebook the beyond sleep training group is very informative and supportive.

Honestly, trust your motherly instincts. You want to do what’s best for your baby and that’s what you’re doing. He’s a lucky baby. Anyone who makes you doubt yourself, talks about making a rod for your back, encourages you to doubt your instincts to be there for your child needs to keep their mouth shut and fuck off. Mothers have kept their babies close to them, cuddled to sleep, sung to them, rocked them since the dawn of time. It’s normal, natural, what’s best for babies.

Thank you so much 🙂

People will always bring up the sleep training, CIO and all sorts of other methods. They will literally pass judgement on everything you do as a parent but I say you pick something you're comfortable with and roll with it. When my DS was about a year I moved him back into my room and set up his cot as an extension of our bed because he literally got up every 2 hours on the dot and would sleep in 40 minute windows past 4 as people told us they should be moved into their own room at 6 months. So for a long while I dragged myself out of bed multiple times a night until I'd finally had enough(my poor wife got serious rejection if she tried). He spent the next 6 months sleeping right beside us and he never slept better. I only wish that I hadn't moved him in the first place as he clearly wasn't happy there but we got judged royally about it.

Absolute opposite to everyone else here, when i was in a similar position with DD at the same age (though waking a lot more in the night) for bedtime we did a mix of shhhpat and CC - I'd put her down in her cot, shhhpat until she was nice and calm, then leave. If she got upset, I'd count to 10, then go back, shhpat, leave. Next time count to 20, shhhpat, leave. V small intervals, because she was v small! I very quickly learnt the difference between WAHHHH I HAVE BEEN LEFT ALONE AND AM SO UNHAPPY and waaaaahhhhh I'm tirrrrrred and don't know how to sleeeeeeeeeep and only went in for the first one. Took about 20 minutes the first night and i felt like a freaking yoyo. But within a handful of days she was self settling at bedtime.

For the overnight wakes, we did proper CC at 10 months.

I firmly believe that independent sleep is a skill that can be taught. I think if your baby is developmentally ready to sleep by themselves, giving them the chance to do so is the best thing for them. If they're not ready, it won't work. Simple as that, to my mind.

I'm probably somewhere in the middle of these views.

My DS is 11 months and we sleep trained him at 6 months. However, we did a very gentle method of staying next to the cot and comforting when he needed it and then gradual retreat. This worked well for him and he now naps well and sleeps through.

So sleep training worked for us. BUT I do miss the cuddles to sleep. Especially as he's now on the move so bats me away every time I try for a cuddle as he just wants to get moving. If I still held him to sleep at least I'd get my cuddles back!

It's a balance for me: I now get a good 2.5 hours a day to myself as sleep training has also led to good nap habits but I've lost the bedtime and nap time cuddles 🤷🏻‍♀️

I cuddled my eldest to sleep every single night right up until he got his big boy bed then he didn't want it anymore. Gets in bed himself, asks for a hug and that's it. I was heartbroken he grew up so fast.
I've just had my second and I shall cuddle him to sleep too. Honestly if you're happy cuddling him to sleep do it and savour every moment because very soon he won't want it anymore and you'll miss it.
My eldest is 2 soon and sleeps 7.30-8.30 and rarely wakes in the night it really doesn't do them any harm. If changing the bedtime routine is something you want to do for you then fair enough but don't do it because other people make you think you should.