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Baby wakes up every 40 minutes during the night

27 replies

Ardnaxelah · 06/08/2020 14:37

Hi all

I'm writing this thread because I am desperate! My almost 5 month old boy doesn't sleep anymore. He used to do 3-4 hour stretches at night, woke up just to feed but for a month or so he wakes up every 40 minutes and takes hours to go back to sleep. He doesn't nap anymore, as well... I don't know what to do, tried fixed schedule, more naps during the day, less naps during the day, nothing seems to be working. He looks happy and healthy, I don't know what's the deal with him. Until a few days ago he has been sleeping from bedtime 9 pm to around 11-12 pm and after that time he usually woke up every 40 mins, but now he doesn't sleep from 9 to 12 either. I'm desperate and sleep deprived, I find myself crying in the night, trying to put him down again. I usually bring him in bed with us when he is hard to settle, which used to work but not anymore... Please help, I need some real life advice or info on what this is. I just can't take it anymore, my immune system is going down, during the day I don't have the energy to do anything...My husband and I hit a rough patch because we are both sleep deprived and he is working as well, it's not easy. Please anyone could tell me what's the cause of this and some advice of any kind? 🙏

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LouiseTrees · 06/08/2020 18:21

How’s he fed/burped etc? How often too? Does he maybe look like he’s getting towards weaning onto food? Reflux was another thought.

Ardnaxelah · 06/08/2020 19:18

Hi Louise

He is refusing to feed, to be fair, not completely but he is feeding way less than he used to, maybe 4-5 times a day and two times during the night (that's full feeds, he's snacking and comfort feeding during the night as well). He can't sit without help yet so I'm guessing he's not yet ready for weaning.
I try to burp him after every feed, but doesn't always work. In regards to reflux, I thought so too but he doesn't really show signs that something is bothering him. He wakes up babbling and in the mood for play...

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Ardnaxelah · 06/08/2020 19:19

Forgot to mention that I'm exclusively breastfeeding.

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2155User · 06/08/2020 19:22

DS went through a phase like this.
Absolute hell.
I remember I would fall asleep making a coffee some days.
It passed, eventually.
I know that doesn't really help, but please don't feel alone.

Redwinestillfine · 06/08/2020 19:22

Assuming he is getting enough food, have you tried a dummy to cut out the comfort feeding?

MajorFaffington · 06/08/2020 19:24

It sounds like the 4 month sleep regression. My now 3.5 year old daughter did the same and it was horrific but it did pass eventually. Hang in there!

ihoeihoeihoe · 06/08/2020 19:29

Definitely sounds like a sleep regression to me. If it’s not something like teething, hunger etc. Can you feel his gums see if there is any sore areas for him, or a teether. My son cut two teeth in the 4 month regression and still wasn’t as bad as yours sounds so I really feel for you. I agree with PP about maybe trying a dummy or something to comfort him?

It does get better. Hang in there OP!

Fizzingsherbert · 06/08/2020 19:31

Oh I feel your pain, both my children were exactly the same and it is relentless. I'm afraid I have no magic answers, they just eventually went longer between wakings. I would definitely aim to get at least one burp after each feed, sometimes it can take a while. My midwife told me breastfed babies burp twice so wait for the second burp before continuing the feed or laying them down. Try and lower all expectations of your day while you're this sleep deprived, cosy cuddles on the sofa, easy dinners and minimal housework. Be kind to yourself, it's so bloody hard but it won't be forever, promise Flowers

Tr1skel1on · 06/08/2020 19:35

It's truly awful isn't it 😭 my DD is 13 soon and I still clearly remember how I felt when she went through this phase.

I tried everything. The only thing that worked for us was stopping bf when she was 10 months old.

Hang in there. It will get better eventually

Megan2018 · 06/08/2020 19:35

It is entirely normal and it will pass but there is nothing you can do other than go back to the newborn life and nap when he does and don’t try to plan or do anything else.
There’s a few phases like this, it seems to last forever but it does end. Hang on!

Crimblecrumble1990 · 06/08/2020 20:08

I almost wrote a similar post at 4am this morning. My nearly 5 month baby has never been an amazing sleeper but I used to get 5-6 hours in a row out of him in a good night and a few day time naps. All I needed was a swaddle, dummy and some white noise and he was off.

The last week, he barely naps and if he does it is after a 30 min wrestle with him to do so. Awake around every 45 mins in the night, can't get him to sleep. I'm sure it's the sleep regression but I'm actually starting to dread the new few weeks if it doesn't improve. I was really enjoying him and now feel tired, stressed and angry most of the day.

Following this thread for the advice you receive!

Ardnaxelah · 06/08/2020 21:05

I totally get you, Crimblecrumble... Sometimes I feel so angry with myself and the baby and everything around us, it gets really frustrating and you can't think straight. I was almost positive that it was the sleep regression, I just needed some reassurance.

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2155User · 06/08/2020 21:06

@Ardnaxelah

Whatever happens, know that you are not alone. We have all been there and we all know exactly how you are feeling x

Ardnaxelah · 06/08/2020 21:07

Gums look fine, no redness or swelling whatsoever. He does put everything in his mouth and has excess saliva so maybe it's teething, too. I'm not sure about that one...

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Ardnaxelah · 06/08/2020 21:09

I am using a dummy, he spits it out sometimes, other times he loves it depending on his mood. Sometimes he just wants to be near me, which is great but would be greater if he and I would get some sleep.

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Ardnaxelah · 06/08/2020 21:10

Thanks everybody, I really appreciate your sympathy and support, it really helps to be told that it will pass...

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JosephineDeBeauharnais · 06/08/2020 21:16

My DS2 (now 27) fed every 45 mins round the clock for 27 months (I counted every minute ☹️). Also EBF. In between times he mostly cried. Nothing worked, nothing changed until he was weaned and in his own bed. Never had a broken night with him after that (not counting coming in pissed at 3am 🤣).
It was utter unrelenting hell, total misery. The exhaustion was unbelievable and I struggled to cope. I hope this is just a phase as yours has previously slept ok. Big hugs.

Shayisgreat · 06/08/2020 21:20

Yes my DS did this at 4/5 months. It was the worst 6/7 weeks I've ever had! I promise it gets better.

ihoeihoeihoe · 06/08/2020 22:17

It does sound like teething could be playing a part, maybe try some bonjela. When he is 5 months you can use ambesol (I think that’s what it’s called) it worked a treat with my LB. It’s really hard when you just need a good rest, but hugs Flowers

mycupofstars · 07/08/2020 09:26

It's the 4 month sleep regression, entirely normal

jamsandwich1 · 07/08/2020 09:51

I promise it passes! It lasted about 2 months with my little boy and suddenly it stopped and he started sleeping and napping really well. It was the hardest time I've ever had and I felt so alone but I promise it will pass. You can do it.

Temple29 · 07/08/2020 10:00

Sounds like a sleep regression. My DS is 16 months now and the 4 month sleep regression has been the hardest part so far. We started using a sleeping bag around that time and giving him a comforter/security blanket when we put him down to sleep and it was a game changer for us. He just needed something but didn’t really want us to comfort him so that did the trick.

It will pass and could just be a matter of time unfortunately.

Temple29 · 07/08/2020 10:00

I should add it lasted around 4 weeks for us.

Ardnaxelah · 07/08/2020 10:57

@Temple29 I still swaddle and was wondering how am I gonna do the transition. That seems like a good way to go, thanks for the tips!

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Ardnaxelah · 07/08/2020 10:59

@JosephineDeBeauharnais You poor soul, I don't even want to imagine how that must have felt for you... Hopefully he does a lot of dishes now 😅 Mine definitely will!

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