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9 month old settles by self during day but goes bananas at night. Any ideas?

10 replies

neolara · 29/09/2007 19:43

Just wondering if anyone has any ideas about this one. My DS is just 9 months and has only slept through a handful of times. During the day has has two naps at regular times. I can consistently put him in his bed awake and he rolls over and goes to sleep within a minute or two. I feed him around 6.30 and then put him to bed in the evening. Generally he feeds to sleep, but often he is awake when I put him down. Again, I can just put him in his cot and walk away. He might cry for a minute or two, but then he goes to sleep by himself without any cuddling or rocking. However, in the middle of the night he wakes up and goes bananas.

This all started at about 7 months when he started to crawl and he began to wake up a few times in the night. I tried CC for nearly three weeks but it made no difference at all. In the end I started feeding him again as I reckoned that maybe he was more hungry than previously. His activity levels had massively increased and he was refusing to eat solids. Feeding him back to sleep worked, but then he started to wake a bit more frequently, possibly because he began to like getting food in the middle of the night. So, about 3 weeks ago I thought I'd stop the night feeds and tried CC again. Again, CC hasn't worked, in fact it seems to have made things worse. He doesn't seem to want to eat but he just becomes completely hysterical. He was screaming for an hour and a half most nights, with me going in to check every 5,10, 15 mins. Pretty brutal for him and me. Have now abandoned CC and feel awful for putting him through it. For the last few nights I have just held him until he has nearly gone to sleep and then tried to put him back in his cot. It's taken an hour and a half both nights. So, the question is, does anyone have any ideas what is going on and how I can get him to go to sleep quicker?

Sorry, this has turned into an essay.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
neolara · 30/09/2007 09:00

Bump

OP posts:
neolara · 30/09/2007 15:03

.

OP posts:
puffylovett · 30/09/2007 19:58

bumping for you as i'm having similar probs - sympathy

suwoo · 30/09/2007 20:04

I am having similar problems with DS who has recently started crawling. I remember with DD that she went through a bad phase sleep wise when she started walking, but I don't remember it when she was crawling. Will be watching with interest and hoping for a miracle LOL

neolara · 01/10/2007 10:02

Thanks for the sympathy. Holding him is definitely quieter and last night he was only awake for 40 mins instead of the normal one and a half hours. For the moment, I am just going with cuddling him and then trying to put him down when he is nearly asleep. Will see what happens tonight!

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puffylovett · 02/10/2007 08:01

how did you get on ? we had 3 night feeds, i wound up bringing him in with us at 4am. big mistake i know, but how else can i sleep ? so of course this morning he has decided to get up with daddy at 7am.... matchsticks for eyeballs please !!!

maybe we should start our own sleep is for the weak thread !!

nappyaddict · 02/10/2007 08:18

co-sleep - it's much easier!!

gingerninja · 02/10/2007 14:18

In my experience this is very common. DD settles well in the day but is a different baby at night. Once she could sit, stand, move we can't plonk her down awake but either have to cuddle her or lay next to her holding her tight on the bed and transfer when she's asleep. IMO, It makes no difference to the wakings wether she puts herself to sleep or with our help.

I'd say, wait 'til he's fully asleep before putting him down and respond quickly when he wakes to restore his confidence. (co-sleep if you're happy with that0 Once he's feeling more confident he might start sleeping better. It's a tricky time for seperation anxiety too.

neolara · 02/10/2007 19:48

Blimey Puffy, three night feeds. You must be exhausted. Poor you.

Last night had to hold him for 40 mins again and then plonked him in bed when he was out for the count. I know lots of people swear by co-sleeping and it works brilliantly for them, but it would be my idea of absolute hell. At the end of a long day I really need my child-free time! (Tried it briefly with DD and never again.)

I definitely think holding him has calmed him down and last night his crying seemed more "how dare you put my down", instead of "oh my god, she's gone, she's gone, AHHHHHHH", cue complete hysteria. So having consulted with the local sleep clinic, the plan is to continue doing holding for a few more days and then do a very, very gentle form of CC. Basically, you only leave them for a minute to cry and if they look like they are getting very upset, go in even more frequently than this. When you go in, avoid eye contact, don't touch them and maybe just say a few words such as "It's bed time now, go to sleep". Here's hoping......

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puffylovett · 03/10/2007 22:35

i'm with you on that neolara, we've had him in with us a few times recently and whilst it's lovely waking up to a sunny happy baby sticking his fingers up my nose, i love my bed too much to share !

i only reluctantly share with dp lol !

I'm not sure i could do the cc, have half heartedly tried it a couple of mths ago but gave up (possibly i'm my own worst enemy). i'm sort of making it up as i go along and at the moment danglng over the side of the cot so he can feel i'm there. he's not needed as much support today, so i'm hoping we might be over the worst. just discovered he's cutting 3 teeth as well as trying desperately to crawl so i'd feel really guilty about doing anything other than supporting him really ! he obviously just needs the comfort !

but then i don't have to get up and go to work as i've just quit my job. if i had to work i think i'd go stir crazy and possibly lock him in the shed i don't know how you working mums do it !! hats off and glasses raised, that's for sure

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