7 week old just will not sleep

[Whydoireadthis]

Hi, I have a 7 week old DD who has never taken more than an hour or so nap in the day. I’m fairly happy with her night sleeping, recently got into a bath, feed, bed routine in which she’s down for 7pm in the Moses basket downstairs until we go to bed whenever she next wakes up which is usually about 10:30. The past two nights I’ve had to wake her as we’ve wanted to go to bed, i suppose I gave her an accidental dream feed as she didn’t wake fully and went straight back down until 3:30. She had her feed and I changed her but then she didn’t go back to sleep until 6:30 and that was in the swing! She’ll usually wake for the day at 5 and I bring her into bed to feed as that normally sends her back on and off until I get up properly about 8. She’ll really fight her daytime naps, sometimes having 10 mins here and there all day. Sometimes she can seem quite mellow, sometime she’ll be fussier but I know she must be tired. Tried making the room dark, white noise, holding her etc but she can be there for an hour just looking round or eventually crying for a feed. Do all overtired babies cry? I’m also trying to get her on a bottle which up to a month old, she was taking once a day. Just stopped suddenly. Can this be normal for this age? How do I force a baby to sleep even when she she’s happy enough?? Any advice appreciated!! X

At that age, she definitely needs more than an hour day time sleep.
What are you doing to settle her? It doesn’t sound like feeding is working, so what other settling methods have you tried; rocking, swaddling, bouncer etc?
If she’s massively over tired she’ll be wired from cortisol and will find it difficult to go to sleep. A lot (most/all) babies need encouraging to sleep at that age as they need to feel secure and like they can sleep, IYSWIM?
At that age she really shouldn’t be awake more than an hour MAX and that includes settling time, so you’d be basically on a constant eat, change, sleep repeat cycle.
Google wake times and also if highly recommend the Huckleberry app although again at this age she really shouldn’t be awake longer than 30-60 mins.

Hi, yes we’ve tried the swing, shhhing, swaddle bag etc, she does fall asleep on my shoulder quite often but again that’s after a while of having her eyes wide open. She doesn’t always cry but I am aware that she’s been awake for too long so do try to have quiet dark time in order to get her down for a nap. I’ve got the Huckleberry app- the free version just to see if there’s any pattern and I can see one just about, ie mid morning nap, lunchtime nap and two in the afternoon. I’m worried so much about her being overtired that I’m now concerned that she’ll be under tired if I put her down too early? She’s just had a 1hr 20 mins in the pram to be fair so maybe yesterday is catching up with her!

@Whydoireadthis - ah so is she having 1h20 per nap or that total time in a day?
If it makes you feel any better, DS would go for periods like that too at that age. I worried myself sick and got into a Google black hole, but with some encouragement (I tried every settling technique under the sun) we eventually found a rhythm.
I remember I could put him in his Snuzpod at night and he’d fall asleep when he was ‘ready’ no tears or anything.
Now though (at 16 weeks) god help us if he goes 10 mins past nap time 😂 it all changes frequently and so quickly.

This is the longest nap she’s had, it’s usually 20-50 mins or so once she’s down. She’s slept again today so I think she’s on some kind of catch up! I’m quite active during the day so I think I’m gonna have to stay in more just to figure her out. There can be times when I pop her down and she’ll suddenly be asleep and others when it takes ages. It’s the inconsistency I’m struggling with😂

@Whydoireadthis - I think the inconsistency is quite normal depending on environment etc!
You’ll get it figured out...then it’ll change again 😂

Think Monday was a fluke! She’s now started waking up after about 30 minutes when we put her down at night and there doesn’t seem to be anything that sends her back to sleep. She used to go down after a feed and that was it until 11ish when we went to bed. Like I said before I’ve done the shhhing, patting, rocking etc. The room is as dark as it can be- blackout stuff is being delivered this weekend- but I just don’t know how to force her to sleep! Shes napped a total of 2hrs today, I took her on a 2 hour walk in the pram and she only slept 20 mins of it! We had white noise on earlier and she woke after about 10 mins. She didn’t even fall asleep on my shoulder after a feed which she normally does. I know she’s massively overtired and it follows into the next day etc but I’m at a complete loss as to what to do!??

@Whydoireadthis - at this point, it’s any sleep, anyhow and I know you’re trying everything.
So she’s not feeding or sucking to sleep?
Does rocking at all send her off? It may be a case of continually rocking so she stays asleep.
How much is she getting in total over 24 hours?

She’s having an average of 12 hours a day Which I know isn’t horrendous but the past few days, she’s fussed at bedtime which she doesn’t normally do. This means her actual sleep time is getting later, and then she’s waking at 5 which is something we’re trying to sort(waiting on blackout blind) x

@Whydoireadthis - that sounds really tough. When is her last feed before bed and how do you try to get her down now for bed? Sorry if you’ve already answered that; I’m juggling DS as I respond!
DS went through an awful phase of something very similar at that age (just checked again on my app) and at one point he’d gone for 6 hours and I couldn’t get him down. 12 hours was about his max too and the NHS guidance said that babies at that age can be between 8-18 hours a day.
I basically held him and fed him to sleep for 3 days straight to try and break the cycle. Then one night he was screaming (over tired) and he was hit so I ended up rocking him beside a fan and he was out in seconds. From there I was able to rock him to sleep. After that, he wanted fed back to sleep and eventually would take a dummy.
Now he’s gone back to being a nightmare and as I’ve stopped swaddling him, I have to pin him down to stop his arms flailing. Everything changes constantly with them and it’s a nightmare to try and figure them out.
I’ll help as much as I can, hang in there! X

We do bath, book/ feed then bed for 7ish but she generally falls asleep on the boob and I can pop her in the Moses basket in living room with us. That used to be fine and we’d take her up to bed about 11 but the past few nights, she’s been waking about 8 and just not going back down, resulting in her eventually dropping off again about 10! I think it’s because she’s not sleeping enough during the day- sleep promotes sleep and all that jazz. She’ll doze on and off during the day on me on some days, then others her eyes are just wide open and don’t shut!😂 I wasn’t too worried until it started affecting her night sleep, and then when she’s whingy when we’re out and about, I can’t stand people thinking she’s ‘a baby that cries’ as she really isnt. In the mornings she wakes up really happy. I love the snuggles but I really need to do some kind of housework too! I have a sling but to be honest I find them uncomfortable as I have a bad back and I don’t find she sleeps any more in it.

@Whydoireadthis - don’t worry about anyone else, do what’s right for you and her. I know it’s tough as you’ve got things to be getting on with but DS sleeps fine in his crib now after napping on me forever.
If you can get her caught up via the sling (and without hurting yourself!) I’d do it for a few days so she’s back on an even keel and take it from there.
There’s a LOT to be said for the fourth trimester too and she really might not feel comfortable sleeping without contact?

Hi @Whydoireadthis. How have your last few days been? I also have a 7 week old DS and really struggling to get him to have decent naps. He will conk out for ages sometimes, but usually only after being awake for ages which doesn't seem right. Like your DD he's pretty cheery so it doesn't feel like he's overtired but he must be. And we have a terrible unsettled witching 'hour' from 7pm - 10pm although I remember my daughter did that to and just grew out of it suddenly.

It's so hard - I feel like I dedicate my entire life to making him go to sleep and keeping him asleep. I have an older daughter to so I feel like I don't get proper time with her. He doesn't reliably feed to sleep, and doesn't sleep that well in the sling unless we go for a walk. And like you it hurts my back.

So no advice but solidarity! I hope you have had a better few days!

Hi, sounds awful but I’m glad to know I’m not the only one! The last couple of days have been better actually, she slept a lot more yesterday, although I’d been out in the morning and just left her with my husband- she’s not taking a bottle so I was trying a ‘she’ll take it because there’s nothing else’ approach(it didn’t work!). I think she wore herself out with the whinging and crying while I was out. Today’s been better still though, I think I’ve realised she has a smaller wake window than I thought. She’ll maybe have time for a feed, a change and about 10 mins play before I need to start cuddles with the curtains closed and getting to sleep. I know what you mean about you just spending all day trying to get them to sleep. I can’t imagine what it’s like with another one. She got herself off to sleep in her crib last night, later than usual but all on her own which I’m happy with but she did wake up more in the night. She has her jabs tomorrow though so I’m not expecting this to last! I’ve not Googled this kind of stuff for a couple of days which I think has helped me stress less about it all!!

Glad you have had a better couple of days and hope jabs went OK. We had a pretty tough day for naps today. We went out in the car and he had a couple of cat naps which I think threw everything off. How quickly are you now trying to get your DD to sleep? And how long does she sleep for?

You are totally right about Google - I think I do maybe need to step away from the Internet! I don't even know why I get so stressed about it because he is generally pretty chilled apart from a couple of hours on an evening.

It’s definitely worse to Google everything!
The cat napping is the worst- always seems to happen because I squeeze too much into one day, I then plan a ‘stay at home’ day to make up for it though. I’m alright with that for now, I think when she’s older and has more structure to her naps then I’ll plan around them.
The time it takes to get her to sleep depends on where we are in the house, I’m not bothered about her sleeping in certain places but I find it easier to put her in her nighttime crib in the dark, with a Ewan and some white noise and she can be gone in 5 minutes if I’ve caught her cues on time. Sometimes I have to rock the Moses basket downstairs for about 10 minutes or she can be in the swing for a while before dropping off. My sister and my mum have managed to rock her to sleep before but I don’t have the back and arm strength! I’ve tried shush and pat but she just cries and can’t hear me over her cries 😂 There’s no definite method that works every time but I do know it’s getting easier now I’ve spent the time watching her like a hawk and timing the wake windows using the free Huckleberry app.
Jabs went alright by the way- I cried which I expected, I just didn’t expect her to go from calm to red face in an instant!!