Anyone sleep trained for the first time at 18 months or thereabouts?

[Swaddleblanket]

In 18 months we have had maybe 3 nights where our little one has slept through - and by that I mean slept til 4.30-5 when he wakes for the day!

I am now so tired I need to do something as I can’t enjoy the days whilst being so tired.

My little one is very sensitive I would say and although plays well on his own, always needs to make sure we are near by and does not like being held by other people, even family.

We still rock him to sleep and it takes up to an hour and we have tried sleep training where we put him down and stay with him but what he’s now learnt is to cry when we put him down so that we pick him up again. So it’s almost made it worse as he’s gone from being calm being rocked to now gets hysterical if we put him down.

Anyone have any advice on where I can go from here?

I am worried if I do any sort of cry it out he will be so aware that we are just leaving him to cry because he’s now old enough to understand we’re not coming back to pick him up etc.

Ours isn’t that age so can’t offer advice other than have you tried the Millpond book? It’s got some great tips in to choosing a method based on age.
Didn’t want to read and run!

I did it around 14 months with my first and probably a bit older with my second (who was a much better sleeper in general so it wasn't such a big issue). The advantage of an older child is precisely that they DO understand. Play some games together where you put a doll or teddy to bed, say night night and then walk away. Your son will know that you have gone, but he also knows that you will come back again too!

Also, it was absolutely the best thing I did with my very poor sleeping 1st child, it totally saved my mental health. I did the whole wait two minutes, go in and say good night, then 4 minutes etc. Don't pick them up but stay calm and breezy. The first night it took 8 minutes for her to fall asleep and I felt so ridiculous that I had waited that long to do something about it!

Yes, or a version of it around 15 months. Now sleeps beautifully.

We did big drama out of it. Lots of time in her room. Your bed. Mummy's bed. Etc. New pyjamas. Special teddy.

Along to bed, as we call the night night show. Night night dogs, pictures, toys, daddy etc.

Then roughly followed Ferber minute chart but slightly reduced it. Our main bathroom is next door so I went there after story and did the waits. First night worst, think we got to 10 minutes. Then she slept. Woke a couple of times but cried for only a minute or two.

For me the penny drop was behaviour consistent. I learnt difference between angry tantrum shouty cry and distress cry. Bed time was angry cry.

Twice since she has woken and distress cried, both times something was wrong, nappy explosion and unwell.

Sleeps now 730 to 630/7. Plus nap.

@Clarabellawilliamson yes!! Just ridiculous I felt. Plus the change in her for getting some sleep made those initial cries fade straight away.

@Swaddleblanket The gentle way to deal with this would involve the first step of moving from rocking to sleep to stationary cuddling to sleep. It rather depends on your parenting style, because this way is a slowly-slowly approach. It will take a long time to get to independent sleep, but with minimal distress. Is this the sort of thing you mean?