Advice for moving 1 year old to own room

[beggingforsleep]

Due to lack of space my 1 year old has been in our room till now. We're moving to a new house in a few weeks and finally we can have our bedroom back - no more stumbling around in the dark!

Sleep has been awful for 6 months or so. He self settles fine at night but is in our bed from around 4am. He has a feed then goes to sleep next to me for another 2-3 hours. The feeding and cosleeping needs to stop.

I want to be gentle but I also need to get a full nights sleep finally. What's the best way of doing this? Does anyone have any experience of moving an older baby in to their own room?

As it's a whole new house, not just room, I was thinking about having him in our room for the first two nights and continuing as we've been. Then in his own room for 3-4 nights still feeding him at 4 but not cosleeping. Then cutting out the night feeds once he's got used to being in his own cot all night.

Does that sound ok? Or should I just move him straight in to his own room and get it over and done with?

We moved DD on her first birthday, in a new house, and bedtime was fine. Just make the change. Keep the routine identical. Enjoy the ability to stare at your phone read in bed!

Can't help on the cosleep and feeding thing as we still do that after 1st/2nd wake-up, which varies from her coming in at 5am or currently, she's there before midnight (but she's poorly and teething molars so waking up allll night).

Your plan sounds quite short and sharp to get a baby used to cosleeping in the early hours to end up sleeping all night in the cot, I would go more slowly. Then again, if 4am is the only wake up, and he goes back down for 2-3 hours, that's... a perfectly normal and good night's sleep for a one year old and I wouldn't attempt to change it.

He might start sleeping through if you night wean from that last feed, but if he doesn't, what's your plan?

I would do the work now, in your current home, rather than once moved when everything is changed.

In the couple of weeks until you move, you could night wean and use an in-cot settling method instead of Cosleeping.

Just wanted to come in on this discussion as we're preparing to move our DS into his own room (he's almost 10 months). For the last few weeks we've stopped his bottle with his dinner (he wasn't having much anyway) and moved his last bottle from around 10.15pm to between 8-8.15pm as part of his new bedtime routine as before he was downstairs with us until he'd had his 10.15pm bottle. So we take him upstairs around 8pm after his bath, feed him, read to him then put him down but still in our room and this side of things is working generally very well however, at least 3 times a week he wakes up in the middle of the night and sometimes won't settle for 2 hours. I don't believe this to be a hungry cry however and at the moment he has his first bottle of the day at around 5am. Anyway I'm a little apprehensive about how he'll be in his own room but i think sometimes you have to follow your instinct as you know your LO best but it's still great to get some advice!

When you move everything will be different and something to get used to, I would include sleeping in own room all night from night 1 with all the other changes rather than get used to new place for a few nights then another change.

@burritofan it's great to hear that the transition worked fine for you, thanks. Sorry that teeth are still keeping you up though!

I mean my plan is clear on paper but in reality I'm putting a single bed in his room so no doubt I'll spend half

@burritofan of the night in my own bed and half with him. Got to start with hope though

@BabySleepTeacherUK thanks for the advice. I had thought of that but his cot is literally a meter away from my bed at the m

Oh my god, fat fingers!

@BabySleepTeacherUK so as I was saying, a meter away from my bed. Everything I've read about changing sleep patterns says putting them in their own room is step 1

@Sally872 you're right. And that will make my DH happier too, he's desperate to have our own bedroom back

@MamaJR2019 sounds like you're getting there! Those long night wakings are the worst though. That's how we ended up cosleeping. I probably should have ridden it out or found another solution. The cuddles are so good though

@beggingforsleep

Oh my god, fat fingers!

@BabySleepTeacherUK so as I was saying, a meter away from my bed. Everything I've read about changing sleep patterns says putting them in their own room is step 1

I wouldn't agree.

It's much easier, you are therefore much more likely to be consistent and stick to The Plan, if you can do the in-cot settling from your bed.

Much more difficult to stick to the best laid plans when it's 3am and you have to get out of bed, walk to another room and stand there in the cold darkness for a longgg time.

IMO I would never suggest moving a baby to own room until sleeping through. I'd suggest doing all sleep training in the parental bedroom.

@beggingforsleep Thanks! Only four teeth to go then it's sleep o'clock! She went from up 5+ times a night to up once of her own accord once she started walking; it's just teeth causing issues now, I think.

The other thing we did was make a celebratory deal of her new bedroom – lots of playing and opened her birthday toys in there, calling it her big girl room, letting her help (well, "help") put clothes away, lots of animal parties in the cot (put toddler in cot, shout "Animal party!" then drop in soft toys while making animal noises). Basically she really likes her room, and her cot, which was key, she was quite happy to be in there for bedtime, didn't bat an eyelid. Made sure the cot sheets were used and smelled familiar; ditto the sleeping bag.

I do also think it depends on your child's temperament and readiness, though, whether you do it now/after move, slowly/all at once. They're all different. Good luck! (And yes to the hope.)

My advice would be to move him straight to his own room when you can, and just make sure the new room is pitch black. We have a blackout blind and blackout curtains.

We did this with DD when we had pretty much the same setup as you, the fact her new room was totally black meant she started sleeping through straight away, I only do night wakings and cosleeping now when she's ill..and now it's just comfort she's after, not milk.