Sleep trained but waking at night

[Goostacean]

I sleep trained my 6.5mo around a month ago and he’s taken to it very well. I breastfeed him, pop him down into his sleeping bag with blackout blinds pulled and white noise on and musical light up bear playing... and he drops off with minimal fuss, usually just whining for a few mins. The bear stops after 30mins and I don’t use the white noise at night.

However... he now wakes at night 3 times! Which isn’t much better than what he was doing before I sleep trained. He went down to 1-2 wakings, and once slept right through 7-7. But now it’s around 12, 3, 6 and then he’ll sleep again til 8am or so. When he wakes I go in, don’t turn the light on or anything, pick him up, feed him again and pop him down ASAP.

Any ideas? Night weaning?

Bump...

How long was he sleeping before this new thing of waking up? Was he sleeping through the night completely? How long has he been waking this frequently?

Babies do go through sleep regressions and also growth spurts which means they need more milk. Has he been feeding well during the day?

Teething?

Totally normal to wake in the night at that age, I wouldn’t change anything. Your routine sounds lovely, night feeds are just normal.

As frustrating as it is, babies sleep isn't linear. This is one of the difficulties with sleep training, it works for a while until something happens. You often need to repeat sleep training after periods of development, travel illness etc. I never sleep trained, but my DS's sleep has dramatically varied over the months and is finally consistently sleeping through now at 10months after I put some time into night weaning. I think that's something you can look at doing a few months down the line, but I think 6.5months May be a little young? I would focus on trying to get as much milk/solids down him during the day, Make sure he isn't distracted during feeds etc. Worth trying other methods during night wakings too, will he go back to sleep if you pat and shush rather then feeding every time?

So, he used to wake I would say 2-3 times a night- he’s never been a good sleeper but we didn’t notice any big changes at the 4 month regression (ie there was no regression). After I trained him at 5.5mo it went down to once a night around 2am and then maybe a second waking at 6, or even 7am in which case I’d just start the day. He has only slept through once ever, 7-7, and that was 2 weeks ago. And then in the last week I would say (and he is now 6 months 3 weeks), it’s become this 12-3-6 pattern. Last night was 1-4.15-5.30... hence me posting, because that’s just exhausting.

I did think teething and he now has 2 bottom teeth that have emerged within the last 3 weeks, but I don’t see a solution- calpol? But the dose will wear off by the early hours and that’s when the waking starts. I don’t want to medicate him for no reason, so not keen to do it in case it’s not teething, I suppose?

I do wonder whether I need to switch to patting/shushing, or maybe DH should be going in and I only offer a feed once a night at a set time? I’d basically like a solid plan to stick to, because I don’t want to wake the whole household (we have a toddler too) if baby is screaming for ages as I’ve gone to him but as refusing to feed him (he’s been breastfed on demand since birth, so it will be a shock!).

Thanks for all your replies, I really appreciate it.

I think you only have a few options really; continue bf to settle him during the night, or go to the whole thing of shushing and patting knowing it may disrupt the house but it may break the cycle of bf to sleep, or go back to sleep training.

I would be inclined to give it a little more time before doing anything different. It may just be a short phase due to a growth spurt and needing more feeding. 6.5 months is pretty young. Routines change. If it does become a longer term thing, and it's clear he just wants comfort from bf, I would go to the patting etc and power through the crying.

I did mean to add, he’s absolutely terrible at focused feeding during the day. He’s very sensitive to noise and wants to look around if he hears a breath of wind or a mouse squeak (metaphors, we don’t live in a field...), let alone the toddler making a racket. So maybe you’re right and I need to wait say 2 weeks, focus on feeding him up during the day, and see if it settles...

Yeah I'd start with trying to sort out the day time feeding. Perhaps you could try and do a couple of feeds in a boring dark room? I've also heard other tricks like "nursing necklaces" and playing white noise whilst feeding to "drown out" his senses with noise. Give that a couple of weeks, and then consider changing up the night feeding. Your idea sounds good - only offering one feed at a certain time and other times your husband can go in and resettles.

Yeah, I think I’ll make a concerted effort with that for a week and see if it helps. At least I’m sure it’ll help my mental state to feel like I’m doing something useful! He’ll feed really well maybe twice a day but other than that the feeds are shorter and even quite “snacky”, so we’ll work on that!

This sounds exactly like us at 5 months and I stopped offering a feed everytime I went in. Instead, I did a dream feed and then another feed any time after 3 and any wake up between 9-3 I'd offer a dummy and patting but no milk. It took 2 nights and she now never has more than one night feed. Only proviso is if she is ill in which case I feed her as much as she wants.

Funnily enough he woke at 10.30pm last night, had a huge feed and then slept til 4.15am. It’s amazing what a 5h block of sleep does for you! What happened when you refused the feed @Bleepers, was there a lot of screaming and crying?

No not really, the first night there was but we went in after 3 mins, 5 mins etc and then the dummy worked a treat. After that we used the dummy and it works 99% of the time. On the odd occasion it doesnt then I feed her because I figure she's hungry and not a robot!

Now, at nearly 8 months, she has naturally stretched the feed to 5am so I might try and drop it completely soon but I'm not really obsessed with sleeping through the night.

You sound like you were in the exact same position as us and I just decided she didnt need to feed that much and it was ridiculous.

Totally normal to wake in the night at that age, I wouldn’t change anything. Your routine sounds lovely, night feeds are just normal

This.

He’s 6 months old. He’s waking for milk at night because he needs milk at night. I would just keep feeding him.

I just do not believe he needs milk 4-5 times between 7pm and 7.30am. He’s snacking on solids 3 times a day now, and having roughly... 6 milk feeds during the day, before and after every nap essentially. He definitely CAN go through the night, and I’m more than happy to get up once for him, or once plus dream feed, but every 3hs is like a newborn! He’s also over 10kgs and in 12-18m clothing so he definitely has enough fat reserves to go for a 7-8h stretch of sleep!

It’s just what breastfed babies do. It’s not just about hunger. Mine woke hourly at that age. Yes I could have shhed and rocked and patted for ages but it was much easier to feed him for 10 mins then go back to bed. Weaned at 13 months and then started sleeping through. It’s not forever, he’s two now and loves his sleep.

I just do not believe he needs milk 4-5 times between 7pm and 7.30am.

But he does. He’s 6 months old. That’s what 6 month old babies do. Breastmilk is different at night to in the day. It’s designed that way. Just feed him.

I do agree with the people on this thread however I had a baby like that and when he got even worse by 10 months I thought I need to do something about it. I noght weaned him and have had full nights sleeps with him sleeping through since. I think your baby is too young for this yet but maybe in a few months?

Also you said you have done controlled crying, what do you mean? For bed time? Because it sounds like you are still feeding to sleep for naps and bed.... so I'm confused.

I’m happy to feed him! But not 3 times a night such that I get 1h then 3hs then 2.5hs of sleep and then I’m awake from 5-6am as I can’t fall back asleep- unlike the baby!!

So no, I feed him before the nap or bedtime, then put him down awake with white noise and blackout blinds, and he falls asleep. In the night I go to him silently, feed and pop him down, but he’s basically asleep by the time I put him down.

Is he in his own room? I would have him in with you - there’s a lot less chance of you waking up so much you cannot get back to sleep when you’re not getting out of bed.

Just be aware that night weaning is also no certainty that he won’t wake in the night. On my small sample of my own 3 breastfed ones, the eldest didn’t sleep through until he was 2.8 (stopped BFeeding at about 17 months) the middle one slept through from 12 months (stopped bfeeding at 16 months - he self weaned as soon as I got pregnant) and the little one has just started sleeping through at 3.4 (he stopped breastfeeding at 2.3 years, probably night weaned at about 18 months).

Yes, he’s in his own room. Or rather, I’ve finally moved out of his room and back into bed with DH, so I’m not keen to give that up! The main problem is the bright sunlight and also the knowledge that I’ll have to be up quite soon due to toddler etc, so I struggle to relax enough. I think some of the issues were caused by the heat last week, so maybe tonight will be better again...