Early riser!!

[0MrsT]

Is there anything I can do to encourage my 18 month old to sleep later?? He wakes at 5.20 every day.. sometimes earlier but 5.20 is pretty consistent, twice this week it has been 4.30

I have tried EVERYTHING l

• changing nap times and lengths, earlier, later, longer, shorter
• no nap at all
• changed bed times earlier and later
• I have completely blacked out the room with layers of blinds/curtains/sheets.
• white noise
• I've tried food before bed
• I've refused to allow him out of the dark room until a more reasonable time
• I've sat and comforted him to encourage hint back to sleep
• I've spent the hour and half going in and out and putting him back to bed relentlessly
• moved him from a cot to a bed.. this worked for 3 days.. he slept until 7.30 I thought I'd cracked it!
• I've got into bed with him
• I've had him in my bed
• I've looked for reasons he's waking.. I even asked next door if they have an alarm set for 5.20 which he may hear.. they don't there's nothing I can notice

Nothing I do will get him back to sleep again he's wide awake and chatting away

I'm 36 weeks with my second and I'd love to get him sleeping longer.. is there anything I can try?? Or am I destined for early mornings forever??

He's not in a bed is he?! That's going to make the issue a million times harder. Can you put him back in a cot? He's far too young to not need the security of the cot bars.

What's his current, usual routine?

By that I mean wakes, bedtimes, naptimes, nap lengths, when does he eat, when does he have milk? what is his bedtime routine and what happens to get him to go from awake to asleep at bedtime and naptime?

He is in a cot bed.. he sleeps much better, he was waking through night several times but he's slept through since taking the sides off, he seems to prefer the bed.

He wakes at 5.20 but he stays in his room until 6.30. Sometimes I have to keep sending him back to bed, sometimes he lays talking to himself.. sometimes he's hysterical and screams so I sit in there, he's in his bed and I sit the other side of the room, I don't speak to him.

We go downstairs at 6.30

He has milk and some fruit at 7.

Then around 9 he has breakfast, cereal/toast

Snack at 11ish.

He goes for his nap at 12. He has a small amount of milk, I sing to him and he goes into bed. Usually pretty straight forward. We have the odd battle but I just keep putting him back to bed and leaving the room and he does eventually remain in bed and go to sleep.

I don't allow him to sleep past 3pm, he usually has about 2 hours.

He gets up and is offered lunch but he often refuses it.

He has dinner at 5, sometimes he refuses this too.

If he hasn't eaten much in the day I offer him some weetabix or porridge around 6.45.

At 7 we go upstairs, he has a bath/shower then 8oz milk before bed. I sing to him and he gets into bed and mostly lays there babbling for upto 30 mins and falls asleep.. as with nap times we don't often have issues with him going down.

His room is blacked out, he goes to sleep with a star protector and white noise, I turn the light off when I go to bed, white noise stays on.

He wakes several times in the night to find his dummy, I only have to go in if he can't find it himself.. I give it him and he settles straight away.

He is too young to be in a bed, from an emotional regulation point of view. He needs to be in a cot, which may make for trickier parenting as you deal with sleep issues but will be much better for his sleep hygiene long term.

By leaving him in his bed hysterical and uncomforted (and ignored) in the mornings, you are creating very negative associations with his bed. In particular negative associations when he wakes up in his bed - which will give you a very difficult situation when he next wakes in the night for teething / illness / general nothingness that periodically do cause night wake ups.

You get the best results with baby sleep if you set your own emotional response as a positive one. I would aim to be kind, compassionate, caring but firm.

Make it as easy as possible for him to go back to sleep, or at least be relaxed and calm. That might mean bringing him into your bed, so that he gets used to 6.30am being his wake up time. If you dont want him in your bed, then you could lie down next to his. Snuggle and be loving with him, not cold and stand-offish. Help him feel comforted and soothed enough to relax.

Maybe he wont drop back to sleep but you want that morning time to be relaxed, still in sleep mode even if not asleep. So cuddled, slumbering, relaxed. It needs to be quite opposed to when you do get up at 6.30am - when be full of energy and ready to go. Do everything you can to keep high energy (ie crying or playing) out of any time before 6.30am.

At bedtime and naptime, try to keep those quiet and calm too. So not getting up or sitting up, not crying or being loud. Keep all associations with being in the cot (bed) positive, calm and relaxing. He should be expected to lie down, lie still and be quiet from as soon as he goes to bed, until its wake up time (6.30)

When he wakes, keep everything quiet and calm. It's OK if he doesnt go back to sleep, relaxing in bed can be just as good for him, but it does need to be a calm and non-stimulating time. His body clock will move to waking later if his body gets used to staying in a relaxed state until get up time (ie 6.30am). If he's used to waking up and facing a battle of wills from 5am (or whatever), that battle of wills is only reaffirming and worsening the early rising in his body clock.

I never leave him hysterical in bed.. sometimes I put him into bed and he's ok.. sometimes I put him into bed and he starts screaming the second I shut the door.. I never leave him like that, I'll go and sit in there and he won't be upset then. when I say I ignore him I mean I ignore his babbling and chatting. If I'm sat in his room he'll lay in his bed calmly and just talk to himself, I meant I just don't engage with that chatting.

I understand what you're saying about the cot and feeling contained. But I do think he prefers his bed to his cot. He used to get frustrated in his cot, he'd wake 2/3 times a night crying because he moves a lot and he'd get his arms/legs stuck.. since being in his bed I never have to go comfort him in the night.. even if he wakes he'll settle himself again, he never done that in his cot. I don't think he has any negative associations with his bed.. if we're upstairs in the day time he'll take himself to sit/lay in his bed. At night time I feed him in the rocker in his room as soon as he's drank his milk he gets down and gets in bed himself. It's not often we have issues going to bed. I do understand what you're saying about battle of wills though on the occasions we do have issues.

I dont mind him being in my bed that used to be the routine, he'd wake early and get into bed with me and we'd cuddle and sleep until 7.30-8. But he just will not settle at all in my bed now, he's much worse in my room. I'd love him to come into my bed and settle for another hour or so but for some reason if we come out of his room he seems to think it's playtime and just won't stay still. If I take him back to his room he will stay in his bed for another 10/15 minutes then he gets back out again. Some days when I do that he does get upset which is when I'd sit in his room with him. Some days I can take him back 3/4 times without causing any upset. Again if I try and get into his bed, or sit by his bed, which I cant physically do anymore being so heavily pregnant, he won't stay calm he thinks it's playtime. Depending on his mood he's better alone or with me there at a distance.

Perfect solution would be to come into my bed and sleep a little longer.. but as I say that's the most difficult for some reason.

Your mealtime routine sounds quite odd to me. Lunch is extremely late and very rapidly followed by tea, with not much in the morning. I would give a proper breakfast first thing, lunch about 11:30 before nap and tea about 4:30/5pm with a small snack before bed if needed. I know you’re asking about sleep not good but its all so tied up together at that age!

I have two early risers as well and have tried everything. Unfortunately I’ve come to the conclusion we just have to ride it out. I’ve seen lots of posts from people saying they ‘just wouldn’t tolerate that’ and so their kids sleep until 8am but I’m yet to hear any detail of how one achieves results by ‘not tolerating’ We did weeks of refusing to get toddler out of bed before 6:30 and she just continued screeching the entire time so no one slept. Now we take it in turns to get up and let the other one ‘lie in’ until 6am.

I am in the exact same situation op with my son who is almost 2. We had a lie in today until 5:52! It’s exhausting isn’t it. I go to bed at 9pm these days 😂

We went through this with DD1. From about 15months - 22 months.

What finally worked was the grow clock (putting it back 10 minutes at a time until we got to 0630) however, she needed the understanding for it (wouldn't have worked at 18months).

Until that point I just went to bed at about 9pm and did what I had to to get though the day.

@Rainycloudyday yep his eating is awful and I do wonder if it's linked!
He will refuse breakfast first thing, will only eat a banana or some apple. He needs to be awake a few hours before he'll eat anything significant.
He often refuses lunch, I've tried all kinds of times to offer it him but he never wants it. I've offered it at 11.30 but he just throws it or feeds it to the dog. He won't touch it when he's just woke from a nap.
He's such a Terrible eater he has very few foods he will eat.. he won't eat anything I cook, his main meal is those 12mnth old pre made meals. if I try and fool him and blend food myself he will not touch it. We're under a dietician as he had a milk allergy and we were doing so well but then he had tonsillitis and since then food had been a huge issue. He wont even try foods.. if I offer him something he won't touch it, or pick it up just pushes it away.
He's just a complete nightmare

I had an early riser and I actually found it was worse if I put her to bed late.

Around this age she's sleep a good 11hrs a night, so I'd put her to bed about 6.30 and she'd be up about 5.30. If I tried putting her to bed later she'd still wake at 5.30 and be grumpy all day as she was tired. I just had to ride it out.

She's 12 now and can still be up at 6am, but at least now she can amuse herself in her bedroom.