Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Sleep

Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler. Need more advice on your childs development? Sign up to our Ages and Stages newsletter here.

11 Month Old SO Restless!!

1 reply

sleepsuit · 23/06/2020 07:34

My 11 month old DS has become incredibly restless at nighttime. I'm talking tossing and turning, twitching and wriggling around constantly. It's keeping us both awake and I'm back at work in 2 weeks and losing the will...

His current situation is this: he naps twice a day (9-10am then 2:00 -3:30) and naps well usually. He doesn't wriggle around while napping, although it can sometimes be a challenge to get him down for his second nap.

He goes to bed around 7/7:30pm.
It can take a long time to get him to sleep at night time and I have noticed over the last few weeks he stays awake for four to four and half hours. If I try to put him down for a nap or bed before this time it just won't happen (it's only his morning nap that is easy to get him down for as he is definitely tired at this point!).

He has been in his own room since 9 months, and we were steadily getting to a point where he was doing 8-9 hour long stretches of sleep quite regularly, which was great as he has always been a bit of a crap sleeper. However, more often that not he is asleep for 3, 4 hours and then wakes. At this point he wants BFing (more comforting) so he always comes into bed with me and this is where the restlessness starts. He is constantly on boob, wriggling around. If I remove him myself he wriggles around loads until he wakes up. DH has tried to calmly put him back to sleep but he just gets louder and louder and we give up and put him in bed.

He eats three meals a day, is fed to sleep still. However, DH can often get him to sleep by cuddling, rocking.

He is teething... he is about to start walking (stands up on own and is crawling EVERYWHERE!) so what I want to know is... is it developmental? Teething? Does he need to drop a nap? Is he a terrible sleeper? Do I need to break the feeding/comforting at night habit?? Any help or advice would be very, very much appreciated.

Thank you for bearing with me this far!

OP posts:
BabySleepTeacherUK · 24/06/2020 15:42

OK, so... this is a really common thing that happens when babies move into their own room before fully sleeping through, and parents are (understandably) knackered after many months of broken sleep.

The problem arises because following the path of least resistance involves breastfeeding baby lying down in your bed, so that you can get more sleep. Completely understandable, but by baby not going to sleep in the cot then you create these unwanted sleep associations (ie baby wants to cosleep upon waking). In the longer term this could well end up with baby getting in your bed earlier and earlier and wanting more and mpore comfort feeds.

IT's going to be hard work to break this cosleeping sleep association, but if you want baby sleeping all night in the cot then the longer you go without dealing with it, the harder the habit will be to break.

So solving this, the Number 1 thing to do is consider where the cot is going to live, while you teach baby to sleep through and night wean. Thing about this with your logical and practical head on, not your wishful thinking head on.

It's going to be hard work, youre going to be spending extended amounts of time hanging over the side of the cot getting baby to settle to sleep in there.

So, will you go for the path of least resistance? I did when my children were this age, especially since I have 4 children to consider. The path of least resistance is to do the sleep training with the cot back in your room

(for anyone reading this, I would always recommend keeping baby in the full sized cot in the parental bedroom until consistently sleeping through. If you don't you often end up cosleeping by the backdoor, when you never intended to)

You can do this with the cot in the nursery if you are OK with that. But bear in mind that this wont be solved fully by the time you're back at work and so you will be very, very knackered having to get out of your own bed to deal with baby.

To settle baby, at this age it involves basically being very consistent and keep repeating the same thing over and over again. Keep your tone calm and compassionate, dont lose your cool and get annoyed (even at 3am after 90 minutes next to the cot!)

I'd stay with baby to do the settling. If baby can lie down independently then keep on telling baby to lie down if they stand, or lie baby down if he cant do it himself. Firm hand on the chest to keep him still and reassured. Use your sleep prop to encourage self-settling - so a dummy and/or comforter. Keep your voice low and quiet, nothing stimulating, keep baby lying down and reassurance until quiet.

Stay next to the cot repeating the same thing over until baby is quiet. Once quiet do not make a move to leave (even if it's 3.30am and youre exhausted). Stay reassuring with your hand, stay still without any stimulation and wait. Wait until asleep and then wait another 5-10 minutes after baby is asleep. Then remove your hand from baby's chest and go back to bed yourself.

If baby's cot is next to your bed, this can be done while you are lying in your own bed. If you have short arms (like me!) and have spare cash, a dropside cot makes reaching down to the cot mattress easier while lying in your bed.

Follow the same routines at bedtime and naptime for consistency. Night weaning will probably help and seperating feeding and sleeping and bedtime and naptime.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread