lack of sleep taking the joy out of life

[nonamex3]

hi all,

I'm a first time mum to a 7 month old. I absolutely adore my child but the last few weeks sleep has gone down the drain. baby has never been the best sleeper anyway but there were nights where I was only being woken up once or twice.

since learning to roll my baby wakes up, and this is no exaggeration, no less than 10 times a night and sometimes more. everytime they rolls it wakes them up crying and it happens five minutes after putting down. I'm not sure there is much I can do about this but please tell me this passes - it's been going on for weeks now and making me feel really really low. I'm anxious about returning to work in a few months incase it's still going on and feel like I'm starting to become an impatient crappy parent - i don't do anything "wrong" so to speak but I feel a lot of the time like I just cant be bothered during the day so just sort of go through the motions rather than put my all into everything like I used to.

I cant remember the last time I got longer than an hour uninterrupted sleep. my baby is also miserable and crying a lot due to lack of sleep where they also dont get very long interrupted at night. makes me furious reading the articles and books that say a 7 month old should be getting 11 hours uninterrupted at night and 2/3 hours during the day. in what world!?

I just feel so irritated and find no joy in the day anymore. I dread going to sleep and have a constant heavy feeling in my stomach. I get irritated by everything.

I just need to know this passes - well until they learn to do the next thing!

Yes. It passes. I know that desperate feeling very well! I’ll be honest (& go against the guidelines), when my baby started rolling, I put them down to sleep on their front. It really revolutionised sleep for us. Started on a nap when I could be watching but i have never been worried about my baby’s airways as they have always been strong in the neck etc. Not giving you advice, just sharing my story. Hang in there!

It passes, it's a tough stage.

Get your partner to do some nights, assuming you have one. 'Work' is not an excuse to opt out of sleep deprivation

I second what a PP said - I have an 8 month old who could roll at about 4 months. As soon as she could roll both ways well I let her sleep on her front and she does this most of the time now - I think it’s just comfortable!

As PP my 10 month old always sleeps on her front now, must be more comfortable x

OP I have an 11 month old and he wakes every hour, sometimes multiple times an hour. It's exhausting, I can't give my all throughout the day.. to anything. And I have a 3 year old to contend with. Also working full time from home. I see an actual mental breakdown coming...

So no advice.. just solidarity and sympathy

We had this with DC1. We did shifts, DH would take her until the first feed (I was breastfeeding, assuming you are too or it's even easier to split the load) and I'd go to bed at 9. I might get 3-4 hours unbroken sleep, which was enough to survive.

Assuming you have a partner, they really have to step up. It's hell, it really is, and it really doesn't last forever even though it feels like it.

OP I completely know how you’re feeling. My 7.5 month old wakes constantly through the night and is upset for ages. Like you, I can’t remember when I had more than 2.5-3 hours of uninterrupted sleep. It’s making me feel so low and I have no energy to do anything during the day. We have two other children as well and I just feel rubbish for them. One of them is a really bad sleeper too, so DH tends to deal with her overnight so can’t help as much with the baby. We’ve followed all the advice and have worked so hard to set a good routine, started to get him to learn to get himself to sleep rather than being fed to sleep etc and nothing seems to help all these overnight wakings .

It’s a tough stage. It does get better - my DD was appalling in the run up to learning to walk, but then there was a big improvement.

Make sure you are getting an uninterrupted chunk of sleep each night. Your DP can take either the early night shift and stay up late on duty, or get up early and do the early shift, whichever works best, but make sure you are getting a block of 4 hours somewhere where you are sleeping PROPERLY. It makes such a difference to getting through the day.

last night was marginally better (she went 10pm - 2am) but after 2 was the same as before pretty much every hour or so. I've resigned myself to the fact that its going to be pretty rough for the first year (or few) and that co sleeping is going to have to be a real possibility in the near future. when she naps next to me (I'm awake) and she stirs in her sleep she settles back immediately when she realises I'm next to her and doesnt roll because shes right next to me. I'm so nervous about it still though but I cant carry on with such little sleep, not with returning to work soon! ;(

I had this until we paid for a sleep consultant at 12 months. Best thing we ever did. My son sleeps like a dream and it's transformed our lives. I feel like that was the right time for us as it meant dropping all night feeds, I couldn't have done that at 6 month.

My advice is get some support if it continues