9 month bay waking at 4am!!!!!

[purplehaze]

Hi

Please help so tired and stressed!!!!

My little boy did'nt start sleeping through untill he was 6 months as he's never been good with his milk and only ever drunk it in the night and not in the day. Well we finally sorted that out when he started solids and he was sleeping 7pm to 7am just waking a few times for dummy. But over the past couple of weeks he's been going down fine at 7pm , but as soon as it gets to 1am from every hour he is waking and I just know that if iwas to give him a bottle he would drink it. It takes about 15mins to settle him again for him to wake 30 mins later. when it gets to 4am he dos'nt settle at all so I end up feeding him and he goes to sleep. I just don't understand why this has started to happen when for the past4 months he's never woken up for food. He has 3 good meals day and yoghurts in between. and has about 1and a half hours sleep in the day.

Sorry for going on,but was just hoping for some advice.

Thanks
XXX

oh dear, PH. you must be on your knees.

from what you've said, this sounds like a sleep rather than a hunger problem. He's got into the habit of night-waking because basically there's something in it for him. Attention, and milk, and the dummy. He needs to learn to sleep without these, if YOU want a decent uninterrupted night's sleep.

However, if you give him milk you will perpetuate the problem, ie he will not be so hungry in the day and so by night he may start to need it. How about a compromise, offer him some water in the night, don't talk to him, keep lights off, no eye contact, no nappy change, leave quickly. It will be so boring for him that soon he'll work out there's nothing to be gained from shouting for you at night. It's bound to be quite horrid while he gets his head around it, but i promise it will work in the end. it's what i would do/have done

wishing you some sleep in the near future

Yeah ph echo potato's thoughts.
You must be shattered but if you try to nip this in the bud it will be better in the long run.
A lot of babies start waking when they realise they are separate from mummy and can get her attention - ie about this age.
The answer may be a controlled crying routine - pop in, settle him, no eye contact, just "shh, bedtime now" type noises, no food or drink, no songs or play...
then go in at longer intervals ie 2 mins, 3 mins, or how long you can stand it!
You may have a few nights of grim hell but he will get the idea.
IMHO a 9m-old shouldn't need food or drink in the night so don't let him think he does!
good luck and hth

Really does work, my ds was very collicky until 8 months and so had no bed time routine, I started tea, bath, book and bed, would put him down awake, god did he scream! took five nights of hell ( first night he screamed from when I put him dow at 7pm until 9.30pm, I would time it and go in every 3 mins, he would stand straight back up and start screaming before I got out of the door, then two and a half hours later he would sleep through sheer exaustion, I felt terrible (bad mother) but on night no 5 he looked up at me, then turned onto his side and went to sleep without a murmer, I couldn't believe it, he woke in the night occasionally and I would go in every 5 - 10 mins, but it worked!

Hi

Thanks all for your advice. I'm going to go for it tonight and just offer water. I don't expect I will get much sleep tonight so I better go and buy a large jar of coffee.

thanks again most of my friends seem to have these perfect little angels, so it's nice to read that i'm not the only one with a little cheeky monkey.

XX

My ds is like this too, ph (though he has never slept through the night).

I was all set to do the controlled crying thing, but now he's poorly. Plus he seems to have developed "separation anxiety" all of a sudden. Does anyone know how long that lasts? Dd didn't seem to have it - at least, I never noticed, but then she was well settled at night by 9 months and got more attention generally.

Oh sounds all so familiar!! DS is 9mths and continues to wake up few times at night, do offer him water and he takes a few sips and settles back to sleep.. but have been doin this for bout 2 mths now and he still wakes up.....
only for few mins tho... cant seem to find his dummy himself even tho its clipped on to his pj's Good luck with your venture!!

purplehaze, i have a problem of ds waking at night, only once, but i am sure he is hungry. (i have a thread on this in food section, 9mth old and tea). what does your ds have for his meals and bottles, and amounts? ds has been waking anything from 3am till 6am, and will not settle until he's had some milk. i am sure he is not having enough to eat at teatime; don't want to give him something too filling, as then he refuses bedtime milk??!

my ds sometimes wakes at 4am ish too - but he is hungry - and I do give him milk - I couldn't bear to hear him cry knowing he was hungry. He doesn't eat that many solids during the day and so I expect him not to be able to sleep right through yet.
But yesterday I got a shock when I noticed his upper gums - he has 4 teeth at various stages of coming through - so no wonder he has been knocking the spoon away from his mouth.
Once they're all through properly I shall persist on the solids front.

hi tracyk, what does your ds eat at the moment then??

Some days are hit and miss really.
He only takes 1 or 2 spoonfuls of savouries (although till the cows come home with pudding on a spoon).
He really want to finger feed himself - which is fine - but I don't think he gets that much into his tummy.
I've been giving him salmon flakes, broccoli florets, pasta in cheese and broccoli sauce, little tiny squares of sandwiches, tuna and mayo, mashed potato (shaped into little balls), scrambled egg and cheese.
He's really gone off the jars - which he loved a month ago - so I haven't a clue if he's eating enough/the right things.
I'm going to invest in a steamer and sit down and plan some menus (one day!)
What's you lo up to these days?

ok, last night was a b**y nightmare!! he woke at 3.45am ish and winged on and off till 4.45 am. eventually got him up and offered him water which he drunk 3oz of. gave him some nurofen. back down for 5am, wouldn't go back off to sleep, so up agian and offered some milk, by this time it was nearly 6am. only offered him 4oz bottle, which he drunk. went back to sleep, we think(?) at 6.15am and then at 6.45am was screaming! drunk another 3oz milk but didn't want any more. back down at 7am, but wouldn't go back to sleep, so got him up and gave him som breakfast at 8am. so, was he hungry initially, was he hungry as he'd been awake that long, or ttething, and just had the milk as it was there?? am too tired to think at the moment. any ideas!??

purplhaze, how are you getting on?

have you tried a little calpol or ashton & parsons?

tried everything, calpol, nurofen, teetha powders, a+p powders, anbesol, bonjela, calgel....! the only thing that has helped is medised, which he has been having at night for this bug/bad cold that he's had. cold seemed to have cleared up yesterday, so didn't give him any calpol or medised. the powders don't seem to do anything anymore.