Sharing a room

[Angelfish]

Our 2 ds (almost 1 & almost 3) have just started sharing a room. We wanted this to happen, as everyone we know who shared a room as a child said it was great. Neither dh or I did, so we're a bit unsure how to manage bedtimes. What do other people do? Do you put them down at the same time or stagger. We tried the latter last night but younger ds wouldn't go to sleep and kept crying and waking older ds. In the end we left both of them crying for about 6 mins and then they dropped off, exhausted.
DS2 then woke at 5.30 this am extrememly excited and I eneded up taking him into my bed so ds1 could get a bit more sleep.
DS2 has always been a good sleeper but just wouldn't settle last night.
All adive appreciated, as DH is away with work all week and I'm not sure how I'll cope on my own if tonight is like last night!!!!

When I first put my two ds in the same room, my partner put the younger one down whilst I sat in our bedroom and read a story to our eldest. Now they are 4 and 6 the eldest comes down and reads his homework whilst I or my partner put the other to bed (with a story and cuddle) my youngest is brill about bed times and is usually asleep within 5 to 10 minutes, but he always slept as a baby whereas my eldest (bless him) can be a pain in the bum about bedtimes, he was a very collicky baby, but they are usually both asleep by 8 at the latest.

Could you let ds2 sit downstairs or in your bedroom with a toy or book whilst you settle ds1?

Oooooh Angelfish! Wait till dh is back!

Our two started sharing a room when ds was just over 3 and dd 1yo. We sometimes stagger nap times, but always put them to bed at the same time. From what you say (cryin for only 6m) they will probably learn to go to sleep together very quickly. It is, after all, very exciting to be sleeping in your borther's room. Ds has always been an excellent sleeper, but dd took a while to get the hang of it, which was the reason we delayed moving her out of our room and into ds's. At first they woke early, but we made it a policy never to go in to them until 6am unless she was crying hard, and gradually moved that time onwards. Now they sleep until 6.45-7.15ish and keep each other entertained once they wake.

Be consistent, let your manner show your dss that you don't expect anything to be different to how it was before the move, and you will find that they will soon settle down again.

BTW if you do decide to stagger bedtimes, I would always put the one who goes to sleep faster and more easily down first. That way there is less hassle and waiting, and less likelihood of disturbing him when the other goes to bed. Once things are working well and both are used to falling asleep in that room, then you could start putting them down together.

my ds and dd shred a room for the last two years and I always put them to bed at the same time although she is 7 and he is 3. They had two stories together then light off. We have just moved and now he is at 7.30 and she is at 8pm. All this means is that he gets a story first on his own and she gets to play in her room for a bit, then gets her story afterwards. She is delighted by the priviledge, but actually quite bored by the extra half an hour!!!!!still she will soon figure out how to use it, because she is certainly not going to give it up. I miss them sharing a room as its only been two weeks and we are already getting - you can't come in my room- which drives me mad.... (wish I had my own room)

angelfish - my two are the same age and share a room. They have the same bedtime (7), and are read a couple of stories and then left.

You may find that the novelty of it will make them play up for a couple of days but then this will settle down.

prettycandles your experience is interesting. We tried room sharing earlier in the summer but gave up after a few weeks because it seemed to spark of a new bout of sleep disruption in ds1 (now nearly 3) - if ds2 cried he would start screaming at him and it would just go haywire..... We've now sorted out ds1 again and we're on a good phase, but he doesn't want ds2 (now 10months) back in his room, and I also think afternoon naps would be difficult to manage - ds1 often resists his but still needs naptime to be enforced.
I'm just so loathe to do anything that would cause sleep disruption again - but perhaps next time we try we should just sit it out and make clear we won't go in if they disturb each other.

Sorry for slight hijack angelfish - I guess I'd echo pc and say that if one of them settles quickly I'd put them down first (don't know how you manage that if you're on your own though!) but that basically they probably need the same bedtime at that age (mine do anyway).

Thanks for all the tips and support. Night 2 has so far gone a bit better than night 1 - ds 2 has been playing up for 30 mins. I've just put ds1 down and ds2 is still crying - but its getting less (or maybe that's just wishful thinking :-) )
At least ds1 isn't wailing or crying (unlike last night). Think maybe ds2 is teething or something, as he's normally a really good sleeper. Also as the builders are in everything's a bit disturbed, which probably doesn't help.... Ho hum, fingers crossed he stops soon....
THanks again for all the advice...