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Please help me sort out this 9mo sleep routine

2 replies

HerculesMulligan · 26/05/2020 06:34

9mo DD is running me and DH ragged. Context which may be/not be relevant:

  • she was tiny and frail at birth as I'd been very ill but slept brilliantly without much encouragement from us, has caught up fast and is now on the 25th centile for weight and in 12-18m clothes. Formula-fed throughout.

  • Our family is 'shielding' - we are getting her (and her brother) outdoors for at least a couple of hours a day but we aren't seeing anyone or going anywhere at all.

  • she has a 6yo brother, whose day runs 6.30am-8pm pretty reliably. DH is homeschooling and doing daytime childcare of both kids, I'm doing a phased return to work after maternity leave and the serious illness.

  • this pattern began at about 7.5/8 months. DH and I are not quite on our last legs but we are finding the early starts really tough. I am already in bed by about 9.30pm so we get very little downtime or time together. He does the late bottles so either comes to bed with me and tries to get some sleep or rest in before the late bottles, or stays up until she needs the late bottle if he's feeling less knackered.

  • no sign of teeth though she's been getting intermittent red cheeks/drooling/gnawing since she was about 4mo. Her brother had 5+ teeth by now. She's rolling and can sit reliably for 30 mins but isn't yet crawling.

  • She's in our room still; we can't physically get her cot into any other room while I'm working from home. If her sleep was better she could potentially share with DS for a while but clearly I'm not going to disrupt his sleep as many times each night as ours is disrupted.

Her pattern at the moment is very reliable and looks like this:

4am - wake up for the day. Shrieks in her cot, shrieks marginally less if allowed into our bed to avoid waking her brother, but doesn't return to sleep and we will usually crack and get up with her before 5am

9am - 25 min nap, usually in her cot but occasionally on someone's lap in which case it'll be nearer 45 mins

12.30pm - falls asleep in the pushchair as we do laps of the road behind our house. Will often wake as soon as we stop so we have to set off again, but can then sleep for up to 2.5 hrs if undisturbed

6pm onwards - slowly becomes grouchy and tired, has a clear bedtime routine and is usually asleep by 7pm

8pm - will sometimes wake for more milk

10.30pm - always wakes for more milk

3am - will sometimes wake for more milk

and so on....

I know there's a way to fix this, but I'm too groggy to work out what it is. Thank God for Chris and Pui doing my early-morning parenting for me through the medium of CBeebies.

OP posts:
LTP2020 · 26/05/2020 13:09

Hello

I got given a plan someone purchased and had some great results with it, but then our son had to spend the night in hospital and it has messed it rite up. It's wake 6/7am, bottle first thing, breakfast 7:30am. Nap at 9am, no more than 30mins. Snack at 10 am, lunch 11:30/11:45. Nap at 12:30, no more than 2 hours. Wake at 2:30 if not awake. Bottle , snack at 3:00, dinner at 5:pm. Bath and 6:15, relax time at 6:30, sleep by 7 with bottle. It also says to try get them sleepy then place them in cot until they fall asleep on there own, this can take some perseverance first few days but he did eventually get it. He slept amazing for 2/3weeks, some times going right through other times only waking once. And was so easy to get back down to sleep. But like I said he spent a night in hospital and now his sleep is terrible. Waking up to 8 times a night. Could be sleep regression as he is 1 week of 10months. Hope this helps?

FATEdestiny · 26/05/2020 13:36

How do you get her to sleep at bedtime?

What happens between being fully awake to being fully asleep, and how long does that take?

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