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Can you help me solve various issues?

2 replies

catpoooffender · 09/05/2020 20:28

Hi all,

We have a few issues with DS' sleep and are not sure how to approach them/in which order.

DS is 25 months. We have co-slept with him almost since birth. He now co-sleeps with DH whilst I sleep alone, which for obvious reasons I do like (ie I get to stretch out and sleep!). However, we feel it's time (probably well past time) he should move to his own bed in how own room. This is complicated by the fact that we are due to move house when lockdown is over, so aren't sure whether to wait until we've done that.

The other issue is that he doesn't go to bed until 10pm. Sometimes he then takes an hour to get to sleep. We know this is too late. He has a 2-3 hour nap in the day. We also know this is too long.

The quid pro quo for DH having him overnight is that he gets a couple of hours to chill in the evening - watch TV, chat to friends, play on the PS, sometimes do some work.

This set-up is somewhat unconventional but in some ways it works well. We all get a good night's sleep. No one has to get up in the night (only exception is if DS is poorly). And it means that on the days I work (in normal life), I get to spend some decent time with DS in the evening.

On the other hand, there are a number of downsides. DH and I don't get to spend the bulk of the evening together, nor do we get much time just the two of us. We don't sleep together. And DS has never had to put himself to sleep.

I think the reason we've resisted addressing it for so long is how well we've been able to sleep at night. We both remember the first few weeks after he was born, before we got into this routine, and how dreadful the lack of sleep was. So we've not wanted to rock the boat. But I think we need to stop putting it off and move towards a more 'normal' evening and nighttime routine.

I know that to resolve the going to bed late issue we need to start reducing the daytime nap. Otherwise I don't really know where to start. Would it be better to concentrate on bedtime first or on the co-sleeping first?

TIA

OP posts:
KarenRogers420 · 09/05/2020 21:37

I hear if you hit a rock hard against your head you will sleep , avoiding all the struggles and advert the stomach pains

grey12 · 10/05/2020 00:58

Advice no1: your health and sanity comes first. My 2yo still sleeps with us (king size bed) and the 3yo is now being trained not to jump in as well in the middle of the night....

There are several techniques, you can try what seems to suit your ideals. These techniques are also bot written in stone, you can change them. I came to a point where sitting in my daughter's bedroom floor for 1-2hr was making me lose my will to live and my temper!!

To get them to sleep earlier, our technique is to get them out of bed earlier! Kids these ages should sleep ~11hr.

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