Paranoid

[piperm]

I'm a new parent, since i was pregnant I became paranoid that my son would pass away young , because i felt I didn't deserve him , it was weird and i got over it but became paranoid, when my son was first born I didn't sleep for three days because i was scared of him choking in his sleep or dying, he was 100% healthy, My three month old son is learning to roll, I cannot swaddle him anymore because it's to dangerous and last night i was so scared of him sleeping not swaddled alone in his crib so he slept beside me (beds against wall and I have a bed for him that's made for co sleeping) he was fine but now is the first night he's sleeping alone not swaddled, and I cannot sleep one bit, I'm so scared of him rolling over while I'm asleep and or I don't hear him in time if he cries for me , I know he's going to be fine but- I overthink to much
Any advice? Anything?! I'm desperate

Congratulations on the new arrival.

I've a tendency to worry, ours is 5 months old now fit and well. So I've been through this.

I don't think there's anything wrong with a little over thinking, but you're going to end up exhausted and that might be even worse for you both in the long run.
Know the risks and be comforted that anything going wrong is highly unlikely.

Have you seen this or similar?

www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B07GDQ3FV8/ref=cm_sw_r_apa_i_AbrSEbBBH8VWH?tag=mumsnetforu03-21

We have this one that we put a firmer mattress under on top of our bed. Most nights we take it in turns and sleep in separate rooms. If together he'll be in this, in a cot bed.

This has mesh floor and with breathable blankets it minimises risk.

You're doing a great job and you will relax over the coming weeks 🙂