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Toddler night waking every 2 hours... nothing working

2 replies

Lauswanny · 29/04/2020 04:24

Hi. Looking for some advice, suggestions, HELP!! My 2 year 8 month old daughter has always been a pretty poor sleeper but recently it has got beyond bad. She’s a really determined kid - a fighter - and particularly towards sleep. She stopped wanting naps about 4 months ago - screams incessantly if I try, so angry, and if I push it I.e leave her any length of time before I go in, she throws all her bed covers, takes her clothes AND nappy off, even takes sheets and mattress protectors off too - and then just goes ballistic - so I have no choice but to go in. I should add that she is still in a cot. I spoke to a sleep consultant who advised to stop trying with the daytime nap as it’s probably creating a sleep pressure/anxiety and affecting nighttime sleep. Cutting the nap completely (not even trying at all) did seem to improve nighttime sleep but now that has got worse than ever!
For the last 2 weeks she is waking every 2 hours, calling out for me, and crying (infact screaming).... if I leave it any length of time, she turns to angry and starts throwing, removing clothes etc (like she did with the naps) so it really doesn’t achieve anything. I’ve been doing the retreat approach - she generally settles quickly when I go in - so I’ve been sitting in her room by the door for 5 mins or so to keep reminding her it’s “sleep time” which keeps her laid down and not crying. I then move to outside the door but with it slightly open - repeating the same phrase every time she calls out, cries or stands up. However I usually need to stay at this point between 45-1 hour (sometimes more) before she goes back to sleep and it’s absolutely exhausting (especially when this is occurring every 2 hours!!!!). Early in the night the process can be quicker and although upset she is still obviously sleepy... but by the time it hits 3/4/5am she is wide awake and just starts to mess around - she knows I’m outside the room so chats, makes silly noises, posts toys through the bars of her cot etc - so at this point it can take way over an hour and on occasion she hasn’t even gone back to sleep before it’s morning sad I honestly don’t know what to do!!!! She has a really calm, consistent bedtime routine (goes to bed at 7pm) and with the retreat approach goes to bed and sleep fine - usually within 5-10mins (I can leave the room straight away but I just sit behind the door until she’s asleep or laying still). Im beyond despair now as totally exhausted... and she is too as she’s barely getting any sleep. Arrrrrrghhhh... any thoughts anyone? Anyone been through similar? Please......

OP posts:
PatricksRum · 29/04/2020 04:51

I would move into her room/ move her into your room.
My dc wakes regularly to breastfeed and then back to sleep which is easier as we bed share.

gingerninja85 · 02/01/2023 02:51

Hi @Lauswanny I know this is an old thread but please please tell me you found a solution! Our 22 month old is going through similar, she had been sleeping well and then we had two full weeks of coughing and illness and it seems to have negatively impacted sleep. She’s feisty (like your DD, though not to the extent of ripping her clothes off, but she’ll scream until she vomits) and is waking roughly every two hours and it takes about two hours to get her back to sleep. I’m pregnant and the two weeks of no sleep is killing me!!! I just lost it on my pillow and pretty sure I’m going to wake up with a stiff neck tomorrow! 😭😭

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