3 month old naps

[DorothyWasRightTho]

Up until now, my 3 month old has been falling asleep feeding and when he does I try and put him down for a nap. I used to bring his basket downstairs but recently have been using the pram so I can rock him back to sleep. He never sleeps for more than about 45 mins like this. I have been reading guides that say not to do this (feeding and rocking to sleep) and to set up a good routine eg dark room, lullaby etc to help them self settle but then surely I will have to leave him alone in his or my room, which goes against the advice of them always being in the same room as you. Not sure what to do for the best really if anyone has any advice it would be much appreciated!

Do what works for you and your baby ❤️

Please don’t change what you’re doing because something in a book or the internet says you should. If you and baby are happy, healthy and rested then you’re absolutely nailing it!

My LO sleeps in his next to me at night and in his sling on me for every nap in the day. Is it convenient? No. Is it what’s best for him? Yes! He sleeps for hours in the sling but only minutes if I put him down. So the answer is obvious.

Of course this goes against loads of guidelines! But why on earth would I distress my baby and myself whilst making him overtired on purpose because a stranger says that me cuddling him and carrying him around when he’s sleeping is wrong? I’d be mad to!

Yes, I accept that the consequence of this may be that he wants to be cuddled to sleep for a long time. I don’t see any problem with this consequence - he is my baby, why wouldn’t I want to cuddle him to sleep?! Plus I’m in my 30s and don’t sleep well when DH is away and I’m alone in the bed - so how can I expect a little baby to sleep well on their own in a cot?!

If feeding to sleep works for you; then you do it! As long as baby is not in any danger, you do what works. You know your baby better than anyone in the world, guidelines are not gospel 😘

On a side note - I’ve never actually met anyone who’s baby just goes down for naps and self soothes without issue. I’m starting to think it’s all a fantasy 😉

Babies can't self soothe at that age.

Do what you're doing and what works for your baby.

Thank you so much @Eggcellent29 you are absolutely right. It is so easy to get bogged down in advice and what you ‘should’ be doing. Also so much time to just sit around and think about it these days!

No problem @DorothyWasRightTho :)

I totally understand! I tortured myself for hours over guidelines and felt like the shittest mum in the world. Then my Mum told me that she used to put me to bed on my front, in a separate room, with cot bumpers and a blanket because that was what the guidelines and her HV told her to do at the time. It made me realise how things change and ultimately my instinct is the biggest protective factor he has!

Lockdown doesn’t help!! I’m really missing out on groups - I think it would help a lot to have other mums around so you can hear how other people do things, that other people make mistakes, etc!

God yes missing groups so much! Thank you for your advice