18 month old and dummy!

[Rachel1210]

Hi all
My LO is 18 months and has a dummy for naps and night time sleep. He doesn’t have it during the day. I’m thinking whilst on lockdown we’d try and get rid of it altogether - as we’ve got a good chunk of time at home with no disruptions. Anyone successfully gone cold turkey at 18 months? Do they sleep terribly afterwards? My LO is a good sleeper so I’m worried this will impact his sleep long term. Also for those that have kicked the dummy habit - what happens now when your LO sees another child with a dummy? When my LO goes back to nursery id be worried all our good work would be undone if he manages to get hold of another child’s dummy! Or maybe will cry if he sees one?!

Daytime naps become significantly more difficult after you get rid of dummy, because of the calming, soothing, settling effect the dummy has.

There's a thing called 'sleep pressure' - it means to what extent the child's body is put under pressure to go to sleep. It's natural that sleep pressure is greatest in the evening, at bedtime.

Sleep pressure is lower at lunchtime or very early morning. So while LO might still need to sleep at lunchtime (Or go back to sleep at 4.30am) they will find it more of a struggle to drop off because sleep pressure is lower.

It is these times when sleep pressure is low that the child (and you!) is likely to need the extra help a dummy gives them in order to go to sleep.

Baby probably would cope without dummy at bedtime at this age (after a couple of days anyway). But the effect of dropping the dummy is often that it is the trigger for dropping lunchtime naps. And can also result in early waking for some - although daytime naps would be the first and primary area to suffer.

That all explained, I'd suggest that 18m is too young to risk losing the daytime nap. For that reason I wouldn't drop the dummy completely in your position.

I would, however, ensure that dummy only ever lives inside the cot and is never, ever used outside of the cot.

Thank you so much for your reply! Yes the dummy stays in his bedroom and never leaves! The moment it’s nap or bed time we give it to him and it instantly calms him for sleep. I just heard the older they get the more difficult to get rid of it....

I don't think it is more difficult when older.

Dropping the dummy is never easy. You're likely to have a few days of difficulty but that's the same whether the child is 18m or 3y, or whatever.

In my experience (I have 4 children) it's easier to drop dummy when toddler is older because they have a better understanding when you negotiate with them (if you don't have a dummy, you can have this amazing toy). Also the older toddler will better understand the passage of time needed to use sticker charts (as in, get 1 sticker per day and when you fill in the whole week you can have your present). It's less likely that an 18m old will have the cognitive ability to understand that level of negotiation.

Having said that, lockdown does offer a unique opportunity for this kind of thing. I can see why you're thinking about it. Personally I wouldn't, but then I'm biased because I think dummies solve many more problems than they create and so am never in a rush to get rid. I use dropping daytime naps as the trigger for it being time to drop the dummy.

I've always heard the easiest times to get rid of a dummy are before 6 months, or when they understand. We got rid of our oldest's at age 3, literally just after his birthday. We wrapped them up for the dummy fairy and when she came, she left a gift (pyjamas and slippers). It was super easy, only a couple of nights asking for them and that was that. We'll be doing the same with number 2 in September.